Readers' Submissions

The Story – Happy , Sad, and Without Ego

  • Written by Anonymous
  • August 19th, 2011
  • 3 min read


Black Pagoda Patpong Bangkok

Why would an “old guy” think he is going to meet a young lady ½ to 1/3 his age and think it will work out? To this day it amazes me. Yes – you may have a few one night stands but for the most part if you plan on keeping a woman of this age you are treading towards failure.

You have nothing in common physically, mentally, or in terms of life experience. Why would one think it will work out? I would love to have a woman half my age but I am realistic. Of course, you may have a better chance if you “look”, “act”, and live younger than your age. Further, if you are retired (at a young age) and you reside in Asia the chances are much greater for success but those chances are very slim in my opinion.

I wish they sold a “get real pill”. Maybe with this there would be a whole lot less broken hearts. There are some circumstances that you will be able to hang out with the “younger” woman but it is based purely on finances. You buy her a car, a condo, and frequent all the finest bars, nightclubs, restaurants but she is a bought woman; once she finds a man closer to her age and the lucky “young” man has a decent job , you will be history.

I like to think I am the exception but in reality I am not. I look at the old farts in Singapore at the Long Bar surrounded by half a dozen models and know at least one is a bought woman. I will spill my beans just to put things in perspective. I am 49 years old but look 45 or even less, not fat at all, great physical shape, and been told by many I look like Richard Gere. I own a factory manufacturing high tech military products, make over 5K$ per week (after taxes), bonuses every 2 – 3 months in the 50-100K$ USD range, and my retirement fund has climbed well beyond 10 million US. That does not include the value of my company, the building, my homes, or my multi-million dollar car collection.

I am married to a Thai lady who is 8 years my junior. She is very well-educated, strikingly beautiful, and very intelligent. I could have married a younger lady but decided I wanted someone to spend the rest of my life with, someone I could always trust, and trust around my now grown children from a previous marriage. I look at myself as a realist. What are the chances this marriage would survive if she was 20 (maybe) to 25 years (probably not) my junior. If she was 25 years my junior I don’t know if I would want it to last, her immaturity would probably drive me crazy.

Let us go back to your home country. Would you marry a woman 25 years or even 20 years your junior? I think not. If you want a successful relationship you must find a lady with whom you have something in common.

I understand these type of relationships sometimes work out but in the vast amount of cases they will NOT. Why break your own heart and take a chance of giving up half of what you have worked for in a divorce (with or without a pre-nup). And let's remember, prenups are not rock solid either.

Think with your head and then your heart. Do not think with the head that swings between your legs. Do not allow foolish pride to place you with a woman half your age even if you could afford it. What kind of life do you want? My marriage is not perfect but certainly better than most. The choice, of course, is yours but IMO reality and foolish pride are separated by a very fine line. I didn’t allow my ego to push me in the wrong direction but the choice is yours.


Stickman's thoughts:

Very sensible advice indeed. What I often say is that we should not do things in Thailand that we would not do at home. Follow that rule and things generally don't come unstuck.