Stickman Readers' Submissions July 26th, 2011

A Sex Tourist in The Ukraine

Yes. The Ukraine. We've all heard about it. I had heard about it and read a few articles. I had heard that with the fall of communism and the low wages over there, that many women had turned to prostitution to make ends meet. I heard that even many housewives were getting in on the act. So, using Thailand as a reference point, I thought it would be very much the same. I figured that if I just did a little investigating and found out where to go, that I would have countless women to choose from. I couldn't have been more wrong.

Were the women over there beautiful like I'd heard? Yes. Beyond belief. Especially at my first stopping off point, Lviv, Ukraine. I walked out on the main square in front of my hotel, (which was The Grand Hotel. My homework paid off. It was the coolest old hotel with the ultimate prime location.) Anyway, I walked out on the sidewalk in front of the hotel, and there they were. Women that were so beautiful, I couldn't believe it. I kept looking and kept repeating to myself. Oh my God. Oh my God. These women were right up there in the super model and beyond category. The were dressed as sexy as you possibly imagine. I'm thinking to myself. Wow, have I got some good times ahead. I kept looking at the men near these women and wondering why they weren't going as nuts as me. It's because, this is just the way it is over there and this is the way they all dress. Nobody even seemed to look twice. That alone blew me away. I'm thinking, Well… I'll just have to figure out where to pick them up, and I've got it made. Only problem was, none of these women were prostitutes. I couldn't believe it. They sure as hell dressed like it. Also, none of them spoke English. I found the local strip club near main street called Split. That was a dead end. Just a small strip club. Hey. I can get that back home. I don't want to just look at women. I'm there to rack up some serious numbers and memories. All those beautiful women and no way to hook up with them. Very disappointing. I was just totally blown away and impressed with Lviv. It was like stepping back into the 16th century. It was like a fairy tale. The architecture was over the top. Just type Lviv into YouTube and you can get an idea of what it looks like.

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It was funny. I did a lot of walking. I thought, I wonder if they have a Thai massage place here. I'll go get a foot massage. Sure enough, they had one right next to the big fountain in the square. I walked in and asked for a foot massage. I paid the money and was lead back to meet the cute Thai massage girl. There were two working in the place. She told me to take my pants off and lay down on my back. I never really thought about that till later. I should've picked up on that clue. Pants off and lay down on my back for a foot massage?? Ok, well, you can guess the rest. She leaned next to my ear and whispered, "You tip?" I'm like sure…. She provided oral and the whole works. Come to think of it, I don't know if she ever got around to my feet or not. She was off the next day. I had the other girl give me a "foot massage" and sure enough, it also came with the extras. I'm thinking to myself. I don't know if the next two stops in the Ukraine will pan out, but I've gained a new appreciation for Thai massage girls.

I had read on the internet that the bars in all the hotels would have girls. Not in Lviv. Things did get better at my next Ukraine stop…… Kiev.

Kiev. I took a private guided tour of all the sights. That was just great. I went down to Independence Square. It was just ok. They had a giant underground shopping mall beneath the streets. There were some nice women, but they were fewer in over all numbers than in Lviv. Later that evening, I came downstairs in my hotel (The President) and sure enough there were about 4 hookers. They were very fine. Not sleazy at all. They arrive about 10 PM. every night. I picked a nice one. The most awesome looking sexy thing you can imagine. She was so great, I was with her two more times. Then, my last night I was with a dark black haired sexy thing with very nice white skin. I was surprised how nice the girls were once you got talking with them. I couldn't believe the statement the dark haired girl made to me. She said, "Ya know, I just want one good man."

I said, "Yeah, you might hook up with some rich guy!"

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She said, "Hey, he doesn't even have to be rich. I just want one good man to be with!"

I thought, gee, if this girl was back in the U.S., guys would be stepping all over themselves trying to get to her. Wow. There's a lot of unfairness out there in the world.

The girls charged $150 U.S. and were very firm on the price. They insisted on condoms for everything including oral.

On to Odessa. My hotel was one of the top in Odessa, but it was very, very old and run down. Once again, where were the women? Not at my hotel. Not downtown on the streets. I could've stayed up till 11 PM when the discos get going but I didn't see the point in it not knowing if that would pan out. It was nice to stroll downtown at night with all the open air restaurants. I still was like the only American over there. No one seemed to speak any English. I had heard that the big soccer cup was coming to Poland and Kiev, Ukraine in 2012 and that the police were really cracking down on the hookers etc. That might have explained things.

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I don't for a minute regret going to the Ukraine. I have a much better understanding of that part of the world now. I suggest Bangkok for the nightlife and if you want a Ukraine woman, just go to the CM2 disco under the Novotel Hotel. Sure, they will quote you a super high price, but it's usually worth it for the experience. They can be stunningly beautiful. Mmmmm, I'm looking forward to sampling a few in January when I return to Bangkok.

14 days in the Ukraine and 7 sexual encounters in total. Not a total washout. If I was in Thailand……..well. if you're on this site, I don't have to explain.

Stickman's thoughts:

An interesting report for sure, and Googling that city sure showed one pretty place.

I was of the understanding that the Ukraine is more the sort of place to go to find a wife, than to be a naughty boy.

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