Readers' Submissions

Anyone For A Massage?



Black Pagoda Patpong Bangkok


Much has been written in submissions here about Thai bar girls – good, bad, warnings, etc. While I admit I have been to more than a few bars while living here over the past year in Bangkok, this submission will cover a few experiences with the ladies in the wonderful institutions of health resuscitation known as Thai massage parlours.

First, who the heck am I – a retired 62 year old (in a few days) American gentleman living in Bangkok who decided to lose a little weight late last year. I'm neither rich nor poor in the greater scheme of things (living on 200K Bt/month). My second wife is Korean and I have no intention to look for a third. Thus I always make a point of showing my wedding ring whenever asked about what I am doing in Thailand.

One of my many many weaknesses is Thai Massage – so marvelous to have someone half my age rubbing oil over tensed muscles at $10USD/hour.

After I first arrived here, I tried many different places in the general Sukhumvit area finding that nearly all offer a "happy ending" of some sort for additional monetary reimbursement.

I should add here that I am a fairly cheap Charlie type of person who lives to save a few baht on any endeavor (e.g. I get senior tickets at Major Cinemas, President discount cards at the Soi 11 restaurants, etc.). I buy produce at the local Carrefour (now Big C) and wine and imported beef at Foodland – wherever the prices are best.

Thanks to my dearly departed father I have a full head of hair with only a little grey. Given another weakness as a Narcissist, I tweeze a few of the grey hairs out each morning – I know I am a bad person for doing this, but please forgive an old man his sins. On the good side I spend about an hour each day in the exercise room at my condo and have lost 10 kilos in the last six months – so I am now about 85 kilos and 185cm.

On to Story 1:

I am always on the lookout for massage places that are less than 200Bt/hour for a Thai massage or 300Bt/hour for a oil massage – Tough to find in the pricy Sukhumvit area. I found one near the Soi Cowboy area late last year and went a few times before finding N. I came for a standard Thai massage and while it started in the standard way with all the usual questions "Where you from?", "You work here?", it veered into unknown territory with "you beautiful" after she took off my massage shirt. Later she pushed me to take off the pants and continued ogle my body which may be ok but is not Tom Cruise by any means. Later I found out she was the typical Isaan ex-wife of some Thai guy with a kid or two, late 30's who hadn't had sex in over a year.

We didn't have sex there – she just wanted to hold and be close to someone. N is no beauty, but she is doing the best she can in a very difficult environment and we remain friends whenever I stop by. She has incredibly strong hands and is one of the best kissers I have ever known. I am complete putty in her hands whenever I am in her charge.

Story 2

Sukhumvit Soi 18 has a lot of low cost massage places back from the main road, but there was one that was 150Bt/hour for Thai massages (250Bt for oil) along this way. Alas, they have raised their prices in the last few weeks, so what I report now is history. After a few visits early this year I met N2 who surprised me during an oil massage with a sudden urgent kissing session. I gave her the standard "I'm married" warning along with the how-old-I-am warning, but this didn't seem to deter her. This place had fairly large rooms with lockable doors which she knew how to use. Sparing the details, she took full advantage of me several times and this became my more or less regular massage place. But a month ago she told me she was going back to Korat to study Dutch prior to joining a married sister/friend of hers opening a massage place in Amsterdam. I wish her well and sincerely hope she can make a better life for herself there.

Story 3

I spend time around Soi 22 for the better pricing you find in the few remaining Washington Square bars and the Queen's Park Plaza bar area. Can you believe 60Bt for a lady drink? Sadly I was there on the last night of the Texas Lone Star closing last week bidding farewell to an icon while hooking up with A who has since moved to another bar in the area. The Soi 22 massage places pretty much all follow the standard 200Bt/hr/300Bt/hr Thai/Oil massage pricing that is becoming the low end norm for Sukhumvit now and after an exercise walk from my condo nearby, I thought I would just go for one of these places. Here I met B.

Again it started as the standard oil massage which I love, because for me there is nothing like a woman's hands rubbing oil all over your body. When we got to the typical happy ending part, again it veered off into ker kissing me and went much further than any real massage is supposed to go. This place was so low end, there were just curtains around each booth, so there was the added excitement of being "caught in the act" if someone checked up on what was going on.

I'll probably return here, but there is always the siren call of searching for a new place and a new experience.

What I find fascinating is that since there seems to be no standard way to do a massage, every masseuse does it a little differently – and I love the surprise of a different way.

So in summary I find the massage ladies to be slightly different than the bar ladies. They (may?) have some actual training. They are often a little older which is fine for an old F#rt like me. And they can see my poor body in all its infamy and then decide if they want to do anything outside of the ordinary with it. There are no bar fines and the worst that can happen is you only get someone to lay their soft hands on you for an hour or two. Yes – there is no alcohol, but at my age that is more a blessing than anything else.

I should add that the above adventures all happened after my exercise regime where I lost weight and the associated belly that went with it. Prior to this I had more standard experiences. Hence I now have the incentive to keep myself in better shape – at least as long as I stay in Thailand.


Stickman's thoughts:

Nice report!

It seems to me that there is more intimacy and tenderness in a massage that goes on to be something more than there is with what you get with a bargirl and as such I am surprised more guys don't go to massage venues.