Down on the Farm, A Response
“ Down on the Farm” By Soi “Hair of the dog” was a well written interesting story. I am going to attempt to answer his question. “Driving back to my office, I ponder Duncan’s dilemma. Duncan is uneducated, unsophisticated and unworldly. It is perhaps unsurprising that he cannot see the elephant in the room. But why I ask myself, do men who are none of these things continually put themselves in exactly the same position following a brief romantic encounter with a Thai bargirl?” This is simply my opinion and I really have no idea if it is accurate or has any merit at all.
The deal with the Thai bar girls has always been business. You pay and they perform. In many ways they are no different than the prostitutes of the West. It is what they do for a living. The money they earn usually provides a source of income for their poverty stricken families and allows them an income that would be impossible under any other occupation. At the very least, that is what we hope to believe. However, there is simply no equal with their Western peers. These lovely ladies create a marvelous experience for most that purchase their services. There is a perception of a romantic experience when you engage these bar girls that may be perhaps unique to Thailand. My only other experience has been in the Philippines, where I found the bar girls real slutty and quite crude. Just my experience.
My experience with them over the years beginning in 1966 through 2008 has largely been very positive. Sure, I have had a few lame bar girls but that is going to happen in any country at least some of the time. The Thai bar girl experience is really quite different than what you will likely find in the US or perhaps other Western countries. They will offer the ultimate “girl friend” experience unlike the prostitutes of the West who are likely to be very hardened drug addicts with a poison attitude.
There is much written, recorded and posted about the Thai bar girls due to the interests of both Western males that travel to Thailand for sex and the media's that are interested in reporting it. What many men don't seem to realize is that before bar girls entered their occupation they were Thai women and remain so. As a result much of what you see in them is the same as a typical Thai woman. Sure, some will very likely change to fit their profession but at the core they are very much Thai.
As a result they want to take care of “their” man. As small children they saw their mothers coddling their husbands, waiting on them and catering to them. This becomes a part of who they are. I have had bar girls neatly press my clothes, hand wash them, pick up my hotel room, and neatly pack my clothes in my suitcase. Once, a bar girl went out in the pouring rain to get me some medicine when I was ill. Do you get this from a Western whore?
Still, I have read and heard many reports of bad attitudes, ripoffs, and other sorted behavior from Thai bar girls. I have to say after countless excursions in the world of pay for play in Thailand I have had few bad experiences and those were never outright ripoffs but rather just a few that did not meet my expectations.
I have enjoyed Thai bar girls immeasurably, with their very demure, feminine and sexy nature they have taken care of me so completely. They can be a sexual powerhouse. At times I think they enjoyed sex more than me, with high levels of passion. This experience differs remarkably from the very few Western prostitutes I have experienced. In some of these encounters I expected to hear them ask, “are you done yet?” Thai bar girls have been an exhilarating experience for me, although now married to a Thai woman I am finished with that chapter in my life.
Many Western men will fall deeply in love with these bar girls with a wanton abandonment. Not understanding that this is simply a business arrangement. It is a fantasy created simply by the bar girl being part of what she is, a Thai woman. These Westerners mean well in the belief that they can offer a better life to these lovely creatures only to later discover that they have no intention of being reformed, and they are quite pleased with their lot in life. It is so easy to fall deeply in love with a Thai bar girl. I have been tempted many times. I always came to the realization that this was a fantasy available to me only based on the thickness of my wallet.
If you refuse to realize this you and the bar girl will be willing participants in the creation of an illusion. The experienced bar girl will likely play the hand you dealt with skill, extracting as much money from you as she can. She may have more than one Westerner deeply involved in this illusion and a Thai boy friend that benefits from her new found wealth as well. For Western men that get caught up in this illusion they have not been able to see it for what it is. I have known men that have had this experienced and it is very sad.
The only reference point they have is with Western women so when they indulge themselves with a Thai BG they confuse the cultural issue. These lovelies treat them as they would a man in their world. The Western man then confuses a cultural behavior with
love and from a Western view it damn well feels like it! Perhaps better stated as a melding of cultures the creates the illusion.