I’ve been meaning to make this point for ages but now have a reason to write. Firstly, we are so wrong to come here as old, ugly men and take on young Thai women. Do you know the story about the two boys playing football… one gets filthy dirty
on the face, the other is spotless. The dirty boy doesn’t wash himself, the pristine one goes and has a shower. Why? It is called ‘inversion’. We come to Thailand through a similar inversion – we look at them when they
are pretty, slim and appealing and our minds treat them as our own image, as in a mirror.
Equally, the age thing is not as bad as some might say or suggest. Human nature is such that we seek the positives always and tend to ignore the negatives. There are three certainties in life… birth, death and taxation. My point is that we all die. Instead of counting years lived and highlighting the gap between say a 50 year old Western guy and a 30 year old Thai lady, look at the likely life span that these people have left. Both have probably thirty to forty years of viable life based on current statistics. It is all a numbers game.
Anyway, this story has no happy ending. No sympathy sought but I do hope that the warning contained herein will help some others after me.
I’m sat in the hotel where I first stayed with her, it's three months to the day from when I arrived. I’ve seen many, many beautiful parts of Thailand and toured round as I’ve never done in twenty plus years of travel here before as I had a real companion and partner for the first time, not a bar girl. I’ve been looked after as a king, cooked for, washed and scrubbed and been sexed to exhaustion the whole three months. I came here to meet her after having seen her on a dating site and fell straight in love, reluctantly going back at the end of October. I came back urgently at the start of November as she was in trouble and went to Bang Rak to get legally married.
I’ve no idea where she is now though… and I am rather lucky not to be married I suspect but even luckier still to be alive. It’d help me to write it all out but that would bore you. So here’s the synthesis… I have a niggly, Asperger’s type of character and won’t let things end. When I foolishly typed my new wife – well wife-to-be’s – name into the internet just before Xmas I fell off my chair when I saw her wedding photos online! Stickman knows this is true as I asked him if he knew the guy since he was a fellow Kiwi; he also suggested that everyone has a past.
The only issue is that the chap was not the past… he was / is her present and was very taken aback to find out that I, and several others it might seem, were on the scene. Finding her mentioned on the internet as a scammer should have alerted me further but try as I might I could not get confirmation e-mails back from the people listed in her profile, just to be sure. I wonder where they are now… There are some golden rules and one is not to share one’s password, but strangely she did this for me and I used it to full effect. She also kept all her papers in the car – she was one of those Thai girls who seem to live in their car rather than a home.
I’ll summarise the scam – she is a registered nurse but seems to be out of work. She never did a day with me these last three months apart from some back street Botox jabs for a bunch of very strange Thai folk. She is (was) stunningly pretty but in a cute rather than a bar girl kind of way. She was a virgin, I was her first… at least that is what I was told although I doubt many virgins swallow on their first night. Her field was haemodialysis and the plan was to set up a private clinic in that line. She claims to be an Army colonel working on special missions (OK, I know how that reads but you had to be there and I drove to Cambodia one day just to check this piece out, I am that stupid). The lines were brilliant, super-fast and could be tested just so far. Good sex does this to us, it dulls our logic. Be warned. This girl was the smartest and most plausible confidence trickster I have ever encountered.
And she is still out there somewhere. The guy who’s lost his sin sot won’t press the button with the authorities. Be warned. I was lucky – the next guy may not be so fortunate.
As an aside, it was a post on here about driving in Thailand and corrupt police officers that kind of prompted me getting in this mess in the first place but I have no-one to blame but myself. Don’t tell me that the Thai legal system is broken, that their administration doesn’t work or that the police are all the devils there are. I’ve driven thousands of kilometres around the country and never been stopped once, despite the odd period of driving too fast or the wrong way.
The Thai computer systems had blocked us getting married due to a ‘technical hitch’ with her paperwork, not mine. Now I know she had a Thai husband originally and who knows, may still have a husband but I suspect now it is a falang. Their systems saved me and I was stupid enough to have signed away my life without a pre-nuptial agreement. How long do you think it would have taken for me to learn to fly in Pattaya? I have a picture of her and the name of a South African guy is on her uniform lapel… what has happened to him I wonder?
The police in Chumphon were heroically supportive when it all blew up and, as far as their non-existent English would allow, were trying to help me get out. I had blown my top when I found out about the NZ guy and there was an ‘affray’. In the UK it’d have been a huge thing… here I just showed them the pictures of her at her ‘other’ wedding ceremony and they understood. A Thai Tourist Police guy in Hua Hin – who was quite senior – took me to one side and advised me to walk away as he could spot that the girl in question was not well in the head. I have.
What does sex in Thailand cost? I had the best three months of my life with her. She took a chunk of THB from my ATM card when the marriage did not go through. I got some back from selling her gold. I had to pay a chunk to clear up with the police in Chumphon but do the maths. Ninety days, every day, lots of times a day, for 40,000 baht means maybe 450 baht a day. Less than a girl from the Beach Road in Pattaya. I made that point to her as I said goodbye two days ago.
I am heading out of Thailand, three months to the day after arriving. I’ll post this through to Stickman when I am out of the Thai jurisdiction just in case. Three months is up now. I already know that I have acquired an illness. Her ‘husband’ who was here in the gap time when I went back to the UK, will have to wait to find out if he has a gift too or something more long-term. And the baby she was carrying would have been three months grown by the time this is posted but has already, I suspect, been added to the list of her victims.
Welcome to Thailand.
Very nasty business indeed. Unfortunately this girl has probably left a trail of destruction – and I bet there are many more out there just like her.
The writer supplied the lady's name and photo but even though I don't doubt everything he has said is true I won't post such details as a matter of policy.