Stickman Readers' Submissions June 26th, 2010

My Life with My Wonderful Wife

I was married back 5-6 years ago to a young lady whom had the drive to receive her MBA from a large school in the US. After dating many woman in Thailand I was certain my ship had finally rolled in and I had found the perfect woman – beautiful, smart,
sincere, etc. She had quite a resume having graduated from Chulalongkorn University and then worked saving money to attend school in the US. I found her to have a great amount of drive having devised a plan to reach her dream (she did receive some
help from her parents, she worked in a restaurant while in the US attending school). Of course she now sends her money to her parents in Thailand.

She returned from the US and worked for several multinationals before we finally met. Funny thing is my (standard) hotel was adjacent to her most recent place of employment and we had probably walked by each other several times not knowing in a few months
fate would bring us together. We finally met through a well known dating service (SS) after my interviewing at least 50 young ladies that just did not anything for me or had attitudes not to my liking. I am considered wealthy by any standard (something
I never divulged until she visited me in the US via a business visa).

He Clinic Bangkok

We have had our ups and downs (mostly up) but she is definitely Thai with perspectives that enlighten my way of thinking on a daily basis. I say this because she simply does not think like an American woman. (And I guess I hope she never does). She works
at my business and with this we are together 24 hours per day. The funny thing is I have yet to grow tired of her or second-guess my decision. She is the love of my life and even the thought of being without her is extremely painful – I did not
know love until I met her.

I have found she loathes my first (American) wife with whom I have two wonderful, trouble free boys. They love her but do not regard her as a mother but rather a friend or maybe even the woman that Dad married. This in itself is our biggest
source of disagreement. She does not always agree with the way I handle their upbringing (BTW: they live with their mother) but she can’t deny they are fine young men being straight ““ students and will obviously grow to become
men of integrity. My eldest was accepted to West Point on a full scholarship but opted to attend a large university having received a 4 year full scholarship from the USAF freeing him from his obligation to the USAF after a short 3 years versus
the eight years West Point would have required. The younger son has just joined the JR ROTC and has aspirations to join the USMC (to my total disagreement); I would rather see him in the USAF as his brother has. One problem being they do not send
her Mothers Day cards which hurts her a bit. There is no doubt they love her and she them but for all the things she does for them a card would be a nice gesture (this is probably my fault).

The only other problem we have ever had is money and specifically that associated with alimony; something she does not understand nor does she believe in. I finally grew tired of the complaints and we now have separate bank accounts except for a joint
savings account to which we both contribute.

CBD bangkok

I write this letter to expose what one might expect marrying a Thai lady with the same credentials. She has been with me through the good and bad. She is definitely my best friend and she is a great wife even after 6 years and I see nothing changing.
Yes – things have changed a bit since the first few years, particularly me – I am growing older, very stressed with my business, but she stands by me whatever the circumstance. Sex is not on the top of the hit parade but never lacking. We have
dreams of retiring when I turn 50 and split our time between traveling (via Motor home and Airplane), living in Thailand, and the US. We will also start a small, low-pressure business just to stay busy without killing ourselves (we plan on using the
profit money for traveling only). The motor home was a joint decision but not carved in stone quite yet; it sounds like fun and her and I would love to travel the US coast to coast and in between.

She is now part of me and my life and I would not give it up for anything. Retirement is 1-1.5 years away and our new adventures will start. Life is good with my Thai wife, my lover, and best friend although I wish, some day, she would approve
of a one night fling for me (she has promised I can at age 85, yes 85???, I will probably be dead by then)

I see many negative posts and I thought I would add a boring yet pleasant look into a Thai – American marriage. I would not think twice but about doing it all again and hope we have another 30+ years together before one of us kicks the bucket.
BTW: I am 48 YO while she is 42 but looks maybe 35. I think the strength of our marriage is in part due to our small age difference.

Stickman's thoughts:

It would have been nice to hear more details about why you think your marriage is so good. Often people say it is good but they're unable to articulate just why that is.

nana plaza