Readers' Submissions

A Happy Ending in Thailand

  • Written by Expat-Matt
  • March 18th, 2010
  • 5 min read


At long last, I have witnessed a "happy ending" in the story of a bar girl/bartender here in Thailand, and it wasn't the type offered by a massage parlor. My last submission was about my meeting "Noi" and the rather whirlwind few nights we spent together. Those few nights turned into a few weeks, and we had a wonderful time just being together outside of the bar scene where we both work. This was a true "no money" relationship that developed and had a rather unexpected ending.

As with many ladies in the bar scene, she left a family back home on the farm a few months ago, and she is constantly looking at pictures of them on her cell phone. Conflicts with her boss and co-workers were getting to her and she stated on many occasions that she does not like working in the bar. Her family also disapproves of her choice to move to the city and work in the "nightlife" industry. We talked at length into the early hours of the morning on many occasions about this and many other things. I was admittedly smitten with her, and she expressed similar feelings for me. She always wanted to be reassured that she was "number one" in my life, and without a doubt she was. She kept telling me that I was her "number one", but I always disagreed. I kept telling her that her family was "number one" and that I was simply a close second. This was a constant issue of debate, and always made for interesting conversation.

It took a while for this to set in for her, but it eventually did. She had been planning a trip to go see her family and son in Nong Khai for some time, and had tried to get me to go along. My work here in the city was not going to allow that, and I had to decline. I had told her that I may be able to get her a better job when she returned, but she was concerned about her English skills working in an expat nightclub. She is constantly learning via books and what I have been able to help her with, but she is very self conscious about her English speaking abilities.

A few days ago, Noi finalized her travel plans to go back to the village outside Nong Khai, and I was shocked to hear that she did not plan to return. The reality of the nightlife scene here in the city was not working for her, and she missed her family very much. She expressed a deep affection for me, but realized that her family ties were much more important. The funniest thing she ever said to me in English was "I stupid….love stupid no-money farang" followed by "I don't care" and a big hug. I had to agree, and we both got a few good laughs out of that one.

Today, I helped her pack her things and close out her apartment before seeing her off to the bus station. I must admit that I was sad to see her go, but the knowledge that she has made a good life choice warms my heart. Before leaving my apartment today, she washed all my clothes, did the dishes and all around tidied up before making me dinner. I tried to give her some travel money, but she refused saying that she had enough. A final embrace was made and the promise of no tears was kept. Not an easy task for either of us, but we both managed to do it without losing face. Watching that bus leave the station was a bittersweet moment and one that I'll never forget.

I've seen so many of these girls "crash and burn" and for once it was nice to meet one with a good head on her shoulders who knows when to get out and has not had her priorities completely screwed up by the scene. Granted, I will be going it alone for the time being, but happy in the knowledge that she will be headed back to a life much simpler and void of all the insanity. I told her many times leading up to her departure of how lucky she was to have a family and a home to return to. Even I don't have that luxury.

I will always remember her fondly, and maybe someday I'll pick up some work in Nong Khai and see her again. For now, you can donate to the "Move Matt to Nong Khai Foundation" at blah blah blah dot who gives a rat's @ss dot com. Just joking, and wishful thinking on my part, but given the opportunity I would probably do it. It's not often that you find a good one here. I wasn't able to keep her, but I am happy that I was at least able to point her in the right direction when she left. I am incredibly thankful for the time we had together, and will treasure it for a lifetime.

Mongers beware!! There are a few of us out to ruin your fun!! I'm joking of course, but then again it's not like you are in short supply of entertainment. I may have been able to keep her here if I had some money to throw around, but then the whole experience would have been meaningless and superficial as opposed to an interesting life experience with a "real" happy ending.

Once again, yet another thing off my list.

"Rescue a bar girl and get nothing but a sense of moral satisfaction (and a clean house) in the end"….CHECK!!!

Thai Dating, Singles and Personals

Stickman's thoughts:

Hopefully things work out well for her.