Stickman Readers' Submissions January 14th, 2010

The Girl Friend Experience

"Unfortunately, the girls you meet in the sex industry are superb actresses. I am sure many of them could win Oscars for their performances if they were in Hollywood." (Marc Holt 13 Jan 2009; Stickman)

In all due respect to Mr. Holt… I suggest not. I am sure that Marc believes what he has written and that in some instances he is correct but I suggest that in more instances than not what he has written is off the mark; let me explain.

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Many men come to LOS seeking the company of nubile young ladies for the instant gratification of sex because…they can. Some of these men are married, some are not. Some of these men are quite content with their lives back in their home country, some are not. But all have one thing in common and that is that they are seeking adventure and the undeniable thrill of novel sex.

Let’s be honest, even with someone you love dearly, once the novelty wears off your sex life you desire the thrill of a new sex partner. No offense to your current partner but the novelty aspect is sweet tasting and its opium lure is strong. Many times the sex act with a new partner, especially in the P4P arena, is cold and emotionally unfulfilling. Being of the male species of this planet however, emotional fulfilment is not generally high on our pyramid of needs and is not necessarily a requirement. But every once in a while something clicks with that new sex partner and a phenomenal, very sweet tasting GFE is had. But why?

I don’t think it is because she is a great actress but rather I suggest that it is a two way street. The women who work in the “personal entertainment” industry work hard; have no doubt. All too often they spend their working hours swapping spit with smelly, uncouth, obnoxious, overweight, drunken customers. They tolerate bad breath, bad body odor and even worse, bad manners.

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Every once in a while however, along comes someone who has actually bathed recently AND treats them as a person rather than a sexual object. For just a few short hours they can hang on and enjoy the “boyfriend experience”. For a short period of time they can escape their dismal world and feel the comfort and love that is missing from their lives.

For just a short period of time they can pretend that someone does love them; someone does care for them; that someone will look out for them. For just a short period of time they respond in kind and look after “their man”. For just a short period of time they are not acting but rather – feeling. They provide what we call the GFE and I maintain that it in many instances it is not an act but rather a reciprocation of feelings.

But all too soon the night ends and with the sunlight comes reality. They collect their fees, listen to the morning lies of how you will call and grab a motorcycle taxi back to their world. Back to their boyfriends / husbands who don’t give a damn about them unless there is money in their purse. Back to their families who want to know what they are going to do for them today. Back to their lonely world – but with the memory of those few sweet, precious moments of last night when love and tenderness prevailed.

While the accepted wisdom is that it is the bar girl who is manipulating the feelings of the sex tourist for personal financial gain as she is a superb actress, I suggest that it is not all acting. I argue that the lady of your choice for the evening may be in as much need of love, comfort and a caressing hand as yourself.

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While you might be lonely and in need of a soft touch, so may she be. While you might long for the tender caress of a soft hand through your hair, so may she be. While you may be looking for a brief respite from your world, so may she be.

I do believe that over a period of time a dulling hardness will put out the flame of the GFE in any woman. The twinkle will go out of the eye, the smile will fade and the laughter will be forced. But when that happens, no amount of acting talent can roll the years back to when she was enjoying life. No amount of acting talent can create the GFE experience again. If the experienced bargirl does exhibit the GFE, it is because she has slipped back into time and is again dreaming of what her life might have been like if only she had met the right man.


Stickman's thoughts:

That's a very interesting perspective and one I don't believe I have heard before. And it makes sense.

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