Perceptions And Reality
Well the debate goes on about mongering and I think the true moral answers are complicated by the many variables and obviously people's perceptions. Stick has successfully goaded many mongers into trying to validate their actions.
Everyone has their own agendas here and some people are trying to justify that they are really good guys just making a commercial transaction. Although we do in Thailand what we would not even consider or more importantly afford to do in our own country.
How much damage does it do the girls and where would they be without the trade we can only guess. Although love it or hate it, I think it is going nowhere and there will always be a market. The world's oldest profession is going to get a lot older and while there are lonely and randy men in the world things won't change soon.
Why are we having this debate over Thailand because surely there is prostitution everywhere? The true answer here is because in typical Thai style it is supported by corrupt Thai officials.
Yes, mongers are short on morals as seen by decent people from educated communities. But that does not automatically make them bad people. I blame the Thai men for the way Thai women are treated. Their attitudes to women amaze me and their lack of respect is so ingrained into their culture that it isn't likely to change any time soon. I believe if Thai women were treated better by their own men there wouldn't be as many girls thinking about prostitution. The lack of respect from their men makes some girls think they are not much good for anything else.
This lack of respect is not only from outside the family but also from within the family unit. This can be brought on from alcohol as many Thai men can not simply handle their alcohol. Generally though it is just seen as the way to treat women and must go back to their distant past.
I also think the Thai education system probably is not helping here and many bargirls are light on for qualifications to improve themselves. I understand you do get bargirls with good qualifications but I consider these girls lazy as they do have options.
Stick takes the moral high ground in this debate and I wonder if he feels a liability to these girls because of his involvement in the industry. Stick may feel subconsciously he has nurtured and supported mongering from his website which could be a factor in his viewpoint.
I have heard said on this website that we farang should treat Thai women as the Thai men treat them. Unfortunately some mongers do and this only reinforces to the girls that they are not worthy human beings. They may not show this outwardly but under the surface this is built into their psyche.
I hate the tattoos the girls get and they brand themselves forever as lower class people. I think this comes from their lack of respect for their own body because surely these girls know that people will judge them by this branding.
Thai people are very judgmental and are only too willing to put people into categories regarding their standing in the community.
Good girls see the Thai prostitutes and bar girls as uneducated and a lower class of citizen generally. It makes you realize what Thais think of the mongering farang who pander to these women.
Especially the Isaan girls are seen in this light as the good ladies from Bangkok will look down their nose at them.
The bar industry will harden the girls and they can fall into the addictive vices of alcohol, drugs and of course sex. To ask a bar girl what she wants to drink in the morning and she says a beer is funny at first but is truly a worry.
We all think Thai women are addicted to sex <We all think? No, we DON'T all think that at all – Stick> but this I believe is not true. I know some guys won't believe this but others who mix with normal Thais know that they are not that much different to our women back home.
I believe the difference is Thai women want to please men and are more willing to cater to their pleasures if you will. This also comes from the fact that these women feel subservient to men generally. But they are not just toys that we can throw around and abuse at our will.
Conversely there are many good Thai men as well and to stereotype people is not fair. As Stick points out, the bar industry is a small part of Thailand. If this is where you spend your time you are probably a monger and it is certainly not the best part of Thai society.
Do you have a lack of morals? This is the question that rages our debate but you need to look into the mirror and come to your own conclusion. I don't think we will be changing anyone's opinion here and that is life.