Readers' Submissions

The Author Cannot Be Contacted


The author cannot be contacted.

I have been a long-time reader of Stick so I know all about the tricks bargirls use to get money. The last time I went to Thailand, I met a beautiful bargirl and soon she was in love with me. I convinced her to go back to university for English so now I send her 40,000 baht each month for school and to keep her away from the bars. I know she is true to me because I am young and I can see the end of my dick without bending over. Plus, she passed the honesty test; I left my wallet with 50,000 baht on the dresser and she only took 10,000 out while I was showering. She could have taken more, but my girl, unlike all of yours, loves me for who I am and would not cheat on me. I can’t wait for my next trip to Thailand to hear how well my sweetie can speak English!

The author cannot be contacted.

I love reading all of those love-lost stories on Stick from all you losers. How stupid can you be? Bargirls cheat and steal from everyone and will never make good partners. The last time I visited Thailand, I had arranged through ThaiSexPervertLinks.com to meet five girls a day for the entire month I was there. It was fantastic, as I scored with each and every one and didn’t have to pay a dime! Of course, there were a few incidental expenses, like the girl who needed money for her mother’s funeral; I had to give her money for that. Also, there was a dead buffalo or two and a few English lessons, but hey, those are normal requests. Anyway, the girls loved me so much they let me “party without a party hat” (know what I mean?) as STDs and AIDS have almost disappeared in Thailand. So, all you losers should try to be more like me and “party like there’s no tomorrow!”

The author cannot be contacted.

Thailand is the worst travel destination in the world and anyone who goes there is stupid beyond any hope. Believe me, I know. On my last trip, my buddies and I were catching a movie in a theatre after some heavy drinking, when a song starts to play. We didn't listen and were talking amongst ourselves. Next thing I know, a bunch of Thai guys start hitting us. We barely made it out alive! The next night we went to a bar and after 10 or more beers, we decided to do a little pole dancing of our own. We got up on stage, humped the poles, and sang real loud; we were having great fun. After 10 minutes, some bar girl starts stabbing us with a knife while some others start screaming and hitting us. My friend had to go to hospital for stitches. But the next incident shows what money-grubbing lowlifes bar girls are. I found a real cutie one night and took her to my hotel room. After a couple hours of sex, she got up to leave and held out her hand. I looked in my wallet and only had 100 baht left. I gave it to her and said I would pay her tomorrow night. She starts screaming and scratching my eyes and raising all kinds of hell. Soon, the hotel manager arrives and kicks us both out. What’s up with that? I’m telling you, stay the hell out of Thailand, it’s no good.

The author cannot be contacted.

Unlike all you working stiffs that read Stick, I am a self-made millionaire here in my little corner of Farangland. What would be hard for you was easy for me because I am smarter than almost anybody I have ever met. Lately, I have taken a liking to Thailand so I have decided to grace their shores by selling my business and moving there. But I am concerned that Thailand may not be worthy of my presence as I understand there is corruption, scams, poverty, and worse yet, people who may not appreciate me. The thought of being shaken-down by a cop for 100 baht or not being able to walk down Sukhumvit road late at night in a drunken stupor without being robbed by katoeys, is just too much to fathom. Why doesn’t Thailand clean itself up the way my country does? Maybe I’ll try New Zealand; I hear people there appreciate great men like myself.

The author cannot be contacted.

Dear DestroyedMan, I just finished reading your latest pathetic piece of pussified prose on Stick’s site. I cannot believe that I, a distinguished person who has lived longer in Thailand than Thai people themselves, was forced to read this submission. You are without a doubt, a disgrace to the human race and don’t deserve to live on this earth, even though most people think you’re a decent sort of chap. Please notice, that even though you published your email address with your piece, I chose to publicly humiliate you because if I sent you an email, you might have (gasp!) replied to it. I hate to receive email or any correspondence that does not reinforce my image as the absolute expert on Thailand. If you want to reply to this posting, I’m sorry you can’t, as I will not reveal my email address to you. Answering email from commoners is such a bore.

The author cannot be contacted.

Don’t you hate it when some yoink posts a crazy story on Stickman and then doesn’t have the balls (yes, it’s usually males) to also post their email address? Some even ask for advice and don’t do it. Unless it’s Stick trying to chum for more submissions, this makes no sense at all. Sure, some postings generate really ugly emails (some justified) but these aren’t Ted Kaczynski letter bombs after all. In fact, I kind of enjoy the death threats I receive on occasion; reminds me that someone cares enough to want me dead. But some of the email I receive is striking for its sincerity and honesty; absolutely the best advice you will ever receive for free, yet it is stuff these authors would never take the time to include in a proper submission to Stick. It really does make the effort of writing any submission worthwhile. Anyway, if you want to get the real benefit of Stick’s readers’ experience, don’t be a wimp and post your email address.

The author cannot be contacted.

Stickman's thoughts:

I could not agree more. There can be real benefits and advantages in submission writers posting their email address and besides the good advice that will come, you might just make some friends from it too.