Readers' Submissions

My Bargirlfriend

  • Written by Anonymous
  • November 2nd, 2009
  • 5 min read



I have recently been to Thailand for 2 weeks and I did the mistake to fall in love with a Thai bar girl…yes, from Isaan. First I'll tell you a little bit about my self. I'm from Cyprus, a small island in the eastern Mediterranean sea. I'm only 23 and not the best looking guy out there. Anyways…

We went to Pattaya, Thailand, for holidays on 17th of September 2009 and stayed there for 2 weeks. My first time in Pattaya and Thailand. I went with another 3 friends and needless to say we had a blast. We all fell in love with bar girls… 4 guys fell in love with 4 bar girls from the same bar, but we had the best time of our lives. All of these happened in the 2nd week of our holiday. The first week was completely different. It was everybody's first time in Thailand and we needed a week to get our shit together. Once we sorted everything out and found a nice cheap 3 star hotel to stay, everything fell right in place. We got pumped. The first week I was with 3 different girls from 2 different bars. The one was actually from P.P. Massage.

So the 2nd week we found a small beer bar near our hotel. The bad thing is that there was no other beer bars around and we were a bit short on money to travel around a lot, especially in the 2nd week.

So with nothing more to do at night we decided the four of us to visit the bar and have a few beers, play some pool and eventually take ladies back to hotel for some boom boom. And…. BOOM!!! We made the mistake of taking the same girls from the same bar every night in the 2nd week until the end of our holidays. One reason for this was the short money cache.

Anyways… I was not in love or anything like that until the very end of our holidays when we had to separate from them. But the girls were crazy about us. At first of course, we all thought that they really liked us for our money. At the end I came to realize that it was us they really liked because they were really crying out loud at the separation when we had to take the bus to the airport (mine was crying 2 days earlier LOL). I mean… the tears could not be about our pockets, as I said before, we didn't have enough cash, and she said to me I don't want you pay for me anymore, although I did. <You're a wise lad to do that. It means at any time you really can walk awayStick>

The last day was like heaven on earth. 4 guys traveling around Pattaya (short on cash) with 4 bar girls, clearly showing that they really fell in love with us, and they knew that we didn't have enough money on us. We went to some shopping malls, to see the big Buddha on the hill and some other places and restaurants. Well, we were 4 couples enjoying beautiful Pattaya in the last day of our holidays, without realizing what was waiting for us at the end of the night when all 4 girls cried really hard. We of course gave away our numbers, our emails, and eventually our hearts.

I still talk with my girl. She is still working in the bar, mainly because she lives above the bar for free. She told me from the very first day that she cannot go with customers and now I'm her boyfriend, her only one boyfriend. Needless to say that she's completely broke, she has a 4 year old kid back in Isaan living with her mother, her father died and her 2 brothers became ladyboys. I was really in shock when I found out about all this, but hey, Thai culture is very different from my "Western" Greek preservative culture.

Now it has been almost a month since I left LOS. As I said we still talk and we are still in love and that's what I really want to believe about her. Every time I ask her if she has another boyfriend or if she has been with a customer she gets really angry. But she also worries about me boom boom lady from home (Farangland). Today I sent her money for the first time through Western Union. Not much though, only 4,450 baht something. She only gets paid 2,500 baht each month now that she doesn't go with customers. I call her 3-4 times a day and around 1:00 – 4:00 in the morning (Thailand local time), so I'm pretty convinced that she doesn't go with anybody else because I almost always hear music or other people in the background and I'm quite convinced that she works and stays in the bar.

Well, I might seem crazy after all this, but all I really want to hear from you is your advice, your thoughts and your comments about my situation. I plan to return to Thailand in July 2010 and stay there for a whole month. From what I read through your website, if she's still in love with me until that time, maybe she's genuine and not fake. But just for the record I plan to brake up with her when I go there again. But who knows… I always plan for the future but nothing comes out the way I want to.

Thai Dating, Singles and Personals

Stickman's thoughts:

Starting from the end of your submission, don't be cruel and break up with her next July. You should tell her NOW that you have no intention of continuing things.

It's hard to believe her when she says that she loves you and is waiting for you. She has a child to support as well as herself and 2,500 baht from the bar and 4,500 baht from you – which does not sound like it will be a monthly thing – would only provide 7,000 baht a month. People do live on that paltry amount but it's a shitty existence. If she is in a bar and she has the opportunity to make money, believe me, she will. Trust me on this, VERY FEW remain in the bar and continue to be faithful. But then, it sounds like you're not too bothered about it anyway.

I reiterate the first point I made. Cut her free. She obviously wants to find someone who is able to look after her financially. If you are unable and / or unwilling to do that, then do the decent thing and tell her!