Stickman Readers' Submissions August 26th, 2009

Wealthy Guy Wanted

Sawadee Ka!

I'm a beautiful (spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old Thai girl. I'm articulate and classy. I'm from the elite class in Bangkok with a degree in PR from Chulalongkorn University. I'm looking to get married to a Farang who makes at least 5 million THB a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind that 10 million a year is middle class in Bangkok, so I don't think I'm over reaching at all.

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Are there any guys who make 5 Million THB or more on here?

I dated a businessman who makes average around 2.5 million THB but that's where I seem to hit a roadblock. 2.5 million won't get me a place in Thonglor. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married to a Farang investment banker and lives in an expensive condo in Central Silom, and she's not as pretty as I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I get to her level? What am I doing wrong?

Here are my questions specifically:

* Where do you single rich Farangs hang out? Give me specifics – bars, restaurants, gyms.

* What are you looking for in a wife? Be honest guys, you won't hurt my feelings.

* Is there an age range I should be targeting (I'm 25)?

* Why are some of the low so Isaan girls living lavish lifestyles in Sathorn while I as a fair-skinned Chinese beauty am not getting the same? I mean, these girls are so plain and DARK-skinned! I've seen really ugly boring types who have nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys, yet I've seen drop dead gorgeous Thai girls in singles bars in Sukhumvit. What's the story there?

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* Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows – lawyer, investment banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do you hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out? Please let me know as I am a good girl and want to meet a nice guy.

* How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? I am looking for MARRIAGE ONLY and no sex before marriage and a high sin sot must be paid for my virginity.

Please don’t contact me for quick sex and hold your insults – I'm putting myself out there in an honest way. Most beautiful women are superficial; especially ones as stunning as me, but at least I'm being up front about it. I wouldn't be searching for these guys if I wasn't able to match them – in looks, culture, sophistication, and keeping a nice home and by being a good wife.

I look forward to hearing from you here on Thai Love Links.

Yours Natacharaporn Songsapanit


Dear Natacharaporn Songsapanit

I read your posting with great interest and have thought meaningfully about your dilemma. I offer the following analysis of your predicament.

Firstly, I'm not wasting your time. I qualify as a guy who fits your bill; that is I make more than £100k GBP a year, which at today's exchange rate is more than 5 million THB a year. That said, here's how I see it.

Your offer, from the prospective of a guy like me, is plain and simple a cr@ppy business deal. Here's why. Cutting through all the bullshit, what you suggest is a simple trade: you bring your looks to the party and I bring my money. Fine and simple, but here's the rub, your looks will fade and my money will likely continue into perpetuity…in fact, it is very likely that my income will increase over the years but it is an absolute certainty that you won't be getting any more beautiful!

So, in economic terms you are a depreciating asset and I am an earning asset. Not only are you a depreciating asset, your depreciation accelerates! Let me explain, you're 25 now and will likely stay pretty hot for the next 5 years, but less so each year. Then the fade begins in earnest. By 35 stick a fork in you!

So in investment terms, we would call you a trading position, not a buy and hold…hence the rub…marriage. It doesn't make good business sense to "buy you" (which is what you're asking) so I'd rather lease you for 5 years. In case you think I'm being cruel, I would say the following. If my money were to go away, so would you, so when your beauty fades I need a way out. It's as simple as that. So a deal that makes sense is dating, not marriage. So are you up for a five year dating deal? Of course I will have to take your virginity and if I decide to pay sin sot (I guess this means the bride price you Thais seem to think you can extort from us ‘Farangs’) then “yes” I will pay pay this but with one proviso. It has to be in installments. 10% will be paid up front with the rest in depreciating installments linked to how good the sex is and how beautiful you remain. If you end up with a pig's knuckle for a vagina or if a couple of Dumbo ears start flapping down between your thighs or if at any time I am obliged to strap a stick to my arse to stop falling in, or your arse gets too big for your boots, then I of course reserve the right to stop the installments. I assume this is acceptable to you but if not, please do feel free to send over your older relative to start the negotiations. I do look forward to hearing what his bargaining chip will be.

You should know that I was taught early in my career about efficient markets. So, I wonder why a girl as "articulate, classy and spectacularly beautiful" as you has been unable to find your sugar daddy in Thailand where beautiful girls are on every street corner or in every bar or on the skytrain. I find it hard to believe that if you are as gorgeous as you say you are that the 10 million THB hasn't found you, if not only for a try-out.

By the way, you could always find a way to make your own money and then we wouldn't need to have this difficult conversation.

With all that said, I must say you're going about it the right way. Classic "pump and dump." I hope this is helpful, and if you want to enter into some sort of lease, please do let me know.

Yours, Khun Dave!

Stickman's thoughts:

Very amusing indeed while at the same time making an excellent point – I just loved the analogy of a depreciating asset! Makes one think seriously about whether to get hitched, doesn't it?!

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