Readers' Submissions

Queen Of Lies And Deception

  • Written by Tom
  • August 21st, 2009
  • 45 min read


The most memorable movies are ones that reveal at the end that what you thought was the story all along is not so. Flashbacks to a few previous scenes explained by a now-enlightened narrator reveal a very different story, although the scenes remain unchanged. You are now left dizzy and surprised how you could have been deceived from the moment you started eating your buttered popcorn. A famous movie that does just this is “Fight Club”, where only in the last fifteen minutes of the film your entire understanding of the story is torn to shreds.

The story I am about to tell you in these pages happened to me, but it took place over a longer time span than it takes to eat a large serving of cinema popcorn; in my case almost one year. Only in the final weeks did the “enlightened narrator” make his appearance and expose a very different story from the one which was thought to be true.

A Little About the Author

Before I start, I will tell you a little bit about myself. My name is Thomas, and I was born in Canada in 1968 to Hungarian parents. I lived in Canada all my life, until four years ago when I decided to quit my well-paying, albeit stressful, engineering job and travel the world for a few years. Like many foreigners who come to Thailand for a vacation, I decided to settle here, and at the moment I am working outside of Bangkok as an international technical sales coordinator for a multinational company.

I could have gone to teach English, but that would have been too unrewarding for me, as well as a waste of my 10 years of electronics engineering experience. Similarly, I could have kept this story to myself, but that would be a waste of a good lesson for others as well as a foregoing of the satisfaction of revenge by making it public in the first place.

May 2008: The First Meeting With "N"

It is the middle of May, 2008. I have just crossed the border from Laos into Thailand, and I am on my way back home to Nonthaburi, which is located just outside of Bangkok. I had been backpacking through the backwoods of Laos for one month, and in the last few months I have been in contact with a girl who I met on a dating website. She lives in Roi Et. Roi Et sits in the middle of Isaan, about midway between Laos and Bangkok. I have never met her in person, but since I will be passing Roi Et on my way to Nonthaburi, we have arranged that I will stop to visit her for a few days.

I arrived in Roi Et the next day, and she was there with her father to pick me up at he bokhawsaw (rural bus station). "N" Lin was a tall girl, more sexy than cute, but nonetheless very attractive. She was not fat, but not thin either, and her big brown eyes made her look a bit more Indian than Thai. I was definitely interested in knowing her more. The three of us found a guesthouse to drop off my luggage, and then her father gave us a tour of Roi Et in his shiny new black Ford pickup truck. In the evening he left us alone and promised to be back to pick his daughter up later that night.

We went off to a pub with live music, and had a few drinks. "N" seemed to be taking a liking to me, and I was glad it was so. A few hours and a few drinks went by, when suddenly she grabbed my crotch under the table! Ladies and gentlemen, we have just lost cabin pressure

For those of you who have stayed in Thailand for some time more than the average tourist and have managed to venture away from the red light districts, you will know that this is definitely not normal behaviour for a Thai woman. In fact, it is not normal behaviour for a farang (western) woman either! I was shocked, and told her to keep her cool. Later on we went back to my hotel room, and taking the obvious hint from an hour before, I got her into the sack without much effort. We had quick sex, since it was late and her father would soon be coming to pick her up and take her home.

The next day the both of them came to my hotel to pick me up for lunch. More touring, and finally her father took me to his house to meet the family. He even let me drive his new pickup truck. That evening, he drove the both of us to my hotel, but this time "N" stayed the entire night. I have never been with a bargirl, and I do not want to be. "N" did not seem to be a bargirl, but that crotch-grabbing incident was still bothering me, so I finally asked her about it. She told me that her husband had died three years prior and she had not had a man since then. Her state of inebriation combined with such a long period of abstinence is what drove her to make the bold move. I was satisfied with the answer, although I could have sworn that she did not look nor act inebriated the previous night.

"N"’s Unfortunate Matrimonial Past

Over the next few days, I learned more of "N"’s unfortunate matrimonial past. She had gotten married to a Thai man seven years prior when she was 21 years old. They went to Taiwan to work in a factory together, and divorced after four years because he had found another woman. "N" wanted to stay in Taiwan to keep making money to send home, so she married a Taiwanese man in order to get a visa. She told me she did not love him, and did it only for the visa, just like Gerard Depardieu did in the movie "Green Card". After one year together, the man told her that he had cancer and would die in a few weeks. He had known this for a longer time, but had kept it a secret, even from his wife, and revealed it only when he was on his deathbed. This seemed rather odd to me, but I took "N"’s word for it. For the ensuing three years, "N" continued to live as a widow in Taiwan, sending money home to her parents. That is how daddy had money for the Cowboy Cadillac he was proudly driving us around in. After her eight year tour of duty in Taiwan, she had decided to come back to Thailand in the beginning of 2008 and start a new life. She would be moving from her parent’s house in Roi Et to Bangkok very soon, and a farang boyfriend looked like a sure foot to step into the new life with.

Touring and Other Things in Roi Et

I stayed in Roi Et for 5 days. With the exception of the first two days touring the town with her father, we spent most of our last three days in bed at my hotel room. This girl was quite hungry, and so was I after not having anything for over one month while in Laos. I believed she must have been hungry, since her three years of abstinence was far longer than my one month.

On our last day together, I decided to be honest with her, and told her that I had another girlfriend who I had been with for quite some time now. "N" cried and that made me feel very guilty, but I promised to see her again. We parted ways, and had no contact for one week while I was with my girlfriend, Jean, who lives in Surin.

From Roi Et to Bangkok

I arrived back in Bangkok at the end of May, and by then "N" had moved there from Roi Et and had set herself up with a beautiful apartment in Bang Na, near Suwanaphoom Airport. The building complex was very new, and housed a lot of farang since a typical Thai could not afford the 10,000+ baht/month rent. "N" proudly announced that she had found a great job with a tour company and was making 40,000 baht/month plus a 6,000 baht monthly housing allowance. All she needed to do was top up the corporate sponsorship for the housing with another 4,000 baht per month from her regular income, and her HiSo living accommodation was paid for. What kind of tour company in Thailand can pay a girl without a university degree so well? She told me that this company catered to older, rich Chinese tourists going to Pattaya for some fun. I think you get my point. "N" was by no means a bar girl, but she was a great asset to the sales department because of her fluent command of the Chinese language. I guess having lived in Taiwan for eight years was still having its benefits.

It was now the beginning of June. I had known "N" for two weeks, and we spent the rest of the month meeting every few days. I always went to stay at her apartment, since her abode was far superior to my humble flat in Nonthaburi. Sex with this 28 year old girl was great, so we stayed in bed most of the time that we were together. She did not complain that I had another girlfriend, but she did say on a few occasions that one day in the future I will have to finally decide who I want to be with.

July: Off to Canada

At the beginning of July I went back to Canada to visit my family. I bode farewell to "N", and told her I would go to Canada alone. In fact, I took Jean with me, who stayed for three weeks and returned to Thailand at the end of July, while I continued to stay in Canada. During that time, I kept regular contact with "N" by email, MSN chat, and the occasional phone call.

In August she informed me that the tour company she was working for was moving to Pattaya, and she did not want to go to such a place of ill-repute. So she will quit her work and will have to move to a cheaper place to live by the end of August.

Mistake! Oh, Stupid me!

Then something nasty happened. I made the mistake of sending an email to Jean, and also forwarding it to "N"! New email server, new software, and brain out of gear, this is my excuse. It was clear from the contents of the email that Jean had spent a few weeks in Canada with me. The jig was up. Now "N" knew my secret. After that she became a bit distant, but we still exchanged sweet emails. The following is an email she sent me only 2 days after she found out about me having taken Jean to Canada:

From: Nee lin <private>
Date: Tue, 26 Aug 2008 07:01:51 -0400
To: [email protected]
Subject: teerak
> teerak tomorow i have packing my bag for new apartment work finish already…we have 2 girl go to phuket and 3 quit. in phuket have more tourist that why they want to move and u know now low season last month we have only 200 tourist come…very sad ..but i have interviwe new job already but i will start in next 3 months ..i must find someting do while i wait for that job …oh i know u will ask me what kind of job hehe..that stroe for jewelry dont wonder how can i do that yes i dont know about jewelry but they must teach me frist for 3 months they will open in next 6 months and i can get salary when i start learn that..they want 6 store in thai ..they have factory that big building close to airport 6 they will find 6 people now they have 2 . teerak many thing for carry..need some help form u teerak but u not here…Did u miss me? teerak u feel better now? …i will happy to hear form u…"N"

Note that she had just moved to a cheaper apartment, still in Bang Na, and wishes that I was there to help her. She was also in the process of starting a new job, after one month of unemployment.

At the end of September she informed me that she found a new job at a mobile phone shop near Siam Centre, and that I would love her new apartment because it is on a very quiet soi. She knew well that I hate the deafening noise that seems to be everywhere in Thailand. Over the course of the following two months she reassured me that she was not looking for anyone, and that she was still waiting for me. In fact, she will be glad to pick me up at the airport when I arrive in the middle of November. I told her to get ready because I was not seeing anyone in Canada, and I will be very hungry when I arrive. We even talked about her starting on the birth control pill before I came back so that we can jump into our carnal activities right after my flight without worry.

November: Back to Thailand

I landed at Suwanaphoom around 10PM on November 16 and waited an hour for "N", but she did not show up. I called her twice, but her mobile phone was turned off. It was a long wait since I had a high fever and no medicine. I got very, very worried that something terrible had happened to her. We had been planning our meeting for many months now, and we had planned to stay together for the first few days in her new apartment on the quiet soi she had boasted about. After I got back to my apartment in Nonthaburi, I called her many times that night, but her mobile remained off. Finally, I fully succumbed to the nasty flu that had laid out half the people I know back in Canada, and left my mother with pneumonia. My room was spinning, and I was shaking from the cold, even though it was over 25C in there. The fever I started on the flight was now worsening.

The next day her phone was still off, but I managed to go downstairs on shaky legs to the Internet café and send her an email. I got a reply the same day, saying that she was fine, and I need not worry about her. She needs time alone because her life is not going too well at the moment. I told her to please call me, I want to know what is wrong, and I am here to help her. The next day came another email, but still she did not give her phone number. Rather, she asked for mine. I just wanted to hear her voice, but she was forcing me to wait another day to get her reply by email.

Mission Impossible: Find "N"’s Workplace

I remembered that she had told me that her new work was at a mobile phone shop near Siam Centre, and decided to go look for her, regardless of how sick I was. In September she had sent me a picture of herself at work, and there was enough of the shop visible that I felt confident I could recognize it if I was lucky enough to find it. I spent half a day checking every mobile shop at Siam Centre, Siam Paragon, Siam Discovery, and Lido, as well as some back alleys in the area. By the evening the fever was worsening, but I decided to check one last place; MBK Centre. I almost had a heart attack when I arrived on the fourth floor only to find well over 200 mobile phone shops, and crowds that made it next to impossible to navigate between them. Needless to say, I persevered, and eventually found a shop that had a door identical to the one in the photo that "N" had sent me. There were a few people working there, but no sign of "N". By then the fever was affecting my balance, and I decided to go back home before people might begin to think that I was drunk.

The next day "N" came online on MSN just as I was writing her an email begging her to break the silence. I told her I was at her workplace yesterday, but did not find her. She did not believe me, so I told her to wait; I will be there in an hour.

Meeting Again After Half a Year

When I walked up to the counter of the mobile phone shop, there was the girl I had not seen for almost half a year now. She was slimmer than before I went to Canada, and she was dressed very nicely with a sexy touch, giving an advantage to her work as a saleswoman. When she saw me, her eyes froze in a deep stare into mine, and I felt like I was the soldier long given up for dead who comes back after the war and arrives in his town only to be greeted by shocked, speechless acquaintances. When she finally could believe her eyes, she came to me from behind the counter and threw her arm tightly around my waist. We walked with our arms around each other through MBK to a café, and had a talk. I gave her my gifts I had bought with me from Canada, a set of glass candle holders and a pewter piggy bank in the replica of the vintage Toronto Dominion Bank building in downtown Toronto. In the accompanying card I had written that the candle holders were for her new apartment on the quiet soi, and the piggy bank was a symbol to help her save money in order to get out of her financial woes.

I asked her why she was avoiding me. Did she have a boyfriend? She told me she did not. She had too many other problems in life to worry about men. Her financial situation was not good. The landlord at the apartment on the quiet soi was demanding that she pay an exorbitant amount for the electricity bill, somewhere around the sum of 3,000 baht, plus other surcharges. She could not pay, so she was evicted, and they kept all her belongings as collateral. The collateral was against the 18,000 baht that she ended up owing her landlord. So now she was living with a female room-mate in a small apartment around Victory Monument, in the centre of Bangkok.

Before we parted, she told me that her real problem is my girlfriend, Jean. She does not want to be the number two girl, so if I want to be back with her again, then I know what I will have to do with Jean. I told her that I will take care of that, not to worry.

"N" Has a New Boy Now

Over the following few days she gave me her phone number and we began to talk like a normal couple again. Finally, one week later, she told me that she had lied to me and she does have a boyfriend, but does not live with him.

Apparently she met him back in September, but does not get along with him very well. He is 2 years younger than her, is still married to an ex bargirl, and has a six year old son. According to her, he is an arrogant fat oaf from the UK, who has been living here in Thailand for the past 7 years ever since he knocked up a bargirl and consequently had to marry her. His biggest interests in life are football, beer, pizza, and more football. He has a bright future in Thailand teaching English, since he could not make it as a car salesman back home. But the big problem is his arrogance and impoliteness in public, to the point that "N" is ashamed to be with him in when other people are around. She reassured me that she was on her way out of this dead-end relationship and will dump the Limey very soon.

I should not talk bad about "N"’s new boyfriend, since he has done no harm to me. In fact, I will not even mention his name, in order to grant him some privacy.

December: Not Thinking of Christmas This Year

It is now the beginning of December, two weeks since I arrived back in Thailand. I had no interest to visit Jean in Surin. Jean, the girl who I had taken to Canada, and it is because of her that I have almost lost "N". As the days went on, I began to fall more and more in love with "N". My girl was sleeping with another man!!! I spent many painful sleepless nights alone in my apartment. I lost interest in all other girls, and chased away the few others that I knew. I talked to "N" every day on the phone and on MSN, but only during the daytime while she was at work. She told me not to call her after work because her friend she was rooming with would go to sleep very early and she would be annoyed by her chatter on the phone. She and the friend shared the same bed, so there was no privacy.

I decided that it was time I made my decision and let Jean go. At least "N" could come and stay with me some nights, which is better than her sleeping with her girlfriend in the same bed in some dump near Victory Monument. I went to Surin on December 2nd, and came back on the 7th as a single man. I left Jean crying in a pool of tears.

I was getting ready to tell "N" that I was now free for her, but she sent me a disturbing email before I could break the news to her. She told me that she lives with her boyfriend already, and that she is very sad, because she has lost her first real chance at true love with me. She cannot leave this man because of her financial situation and also because she has been living with him since the middle of September, which is TWO MONTHS before I came back from Canada!!!

I went down to MBK to meet her, and asked her why she had not told me this before. Her answer was that she loves me so much, that she did not want to lose me by telling me everything at once. Her strategy was to reveal the story piece-meal, which would make it more manageable for me, and maybe I would not leave her. Her strategy worked. I was hooked and I could not even get upset at her, even though she had been lying to my face since I came back from Canada, and in addition lying in email for two months prior to that.

Then she continued and told me that when she found out in August that I had taken Jean to Canada, she was devastated. She had just moved to an unfamiliar apartment in a very quiet neighbourhood, and in addition had become recently unemployed. With so much time on her hands, she spent a full two weeks crying alone in her room and drinking heavily. One morning she had woken up in the bathroom with her head resting on top of the toilet. It was then that she realized that she must do something before she became a complete wreck, and out of desperation forced herself to get out of her apartment and socialize a bit, and that is how she met her new boyfriend. He was the knight in shining armour who came to her emotional rescue. Oh, did I ever feel guilty for having done this to an innocent girl, while I was having a good time with my family in Canada!

It is now the middle of December and "N" and I have been talking more and more, which does me more harm than good since my heart aches even more at night when I can not call her after she had arrived home to be with her boy.

An Early Christmas Present

One particular lonesome night my mobile rang at 1AM. It was "N"! She never called after working hours. I hurriedly pick up the phone, and she was sobbing. She told me that she just had a big fight with her boyfriend. He roughed her up a bit, and threw her mobile phone across the floor. She asked if she could come over. Of course!, I told her. She was at my apartment within an hour, and I knew that my wish had come true. He had finally gone over the limit, and "N" had the excuse to leave him. She stayed with me for two days, and needless to say, we had a lot of catching up to do in sex! We had not been with each other for almost half a year now. Christmas had come early for me this year.

Her boyfriend kept calling her every few hours, sobbing like a baby, until finally she felt sorry for him and went back to him. I had not expected this, but here I was alone again.

Three days later it happened again, except this time the fat oaf beat her up and smashed her mobile phone to pieces. She came over with bruises all over her arms and legs. I am not an angel when it comes to women, since there have been times that I had more than one at the same time. But one thing I can say with pride is that I never, ever hit or physically hurt a woman, even though I do have a very bad temper.

I have no respect for anyone who does, so I believe that I am being too fair to this boyfriend of hers by protecting his anonymity. So I will divulge some, but not all that I know about him. His name is <edited by Stick>, and he hails from <edited by Stick>. The last I know, he is an English teacher at a school in <edited by Stick>, and occasionally teaches at <edited by Stick>. Apparently he has no university degree either, and neither does he have a work permit if I am to believe "N" – more on his illegal alien status later.

This time "N" brought a few bags of her clothes and toiletries over and said that she would not go back to live in <edited by Stick> again. But alas, two days later she was back with him, after he had sobbed a river to her over the phone. He was starting to sound like a real piece of work; a spoiled baby. I felt sorry for "N", and bought her a new mobile phone, while I continued to use my 7 year old Nokia.

New Year's Eve went by without an incident. I could not understand why "N" could not leave him. She seemed ready to leave him before he had developed a penchant for woman-beating, so what was holding her there now? During my visits to her work, her boss had taken a linking to me, and she had been pushing "N" to leave him, especially since her salesgirl was showing up to work regularly now showing obvious signs of being on the receiving end of domestic violence. Maybe her boss could tell me something I did not know, so I decided to visit MBK on a day that "N" was not working.

Her boss told me that ever since I came back from Canada, "N" has only talked good things about me at work, and constantly complained about the other guy. Everyone at her workplace hated him. But, she could not understand why "N" was unable to finally leave him. Her last words to me were to hang in there, keep supporting "N" because she does indeed love me deeply, and she will come back to me very soon.

"N" also promised that she will come back to me very soon, but what was stopping her at the moment was the fear of what he would do if she left him. When I asked her to elaborate in more detail, she said that he would come to her workplace at MBK to harass her, and follow her home to wherever her new place may be. I told her that it is practically impossible for him to do that, given she works in such a busy place and travels by pubic transit packed with people. In return, she said that he is a bit insane, and would definitely stalk her and hunt her down, even if that requires that he force himself into a taxi with her after work. In addition, since he had hacked her email account back in November (and deleted my flight information I sent to "N"), there is a good chance that he knew my address in Nonthaburi, had he the foresight to write it down back then. In this case, if she moved in with me, I could expect a crazed madman to come knocking at my door, ready to kill the both of us with his bare hands. Here is an excerpt from one of our MSN chats (My ID is Shinsegae):

Shinsegae says:
do yu stay with him cos you really love him, or do you stay cos he will do something bad if you leave him?

Shinsegae says:
does he know something about you that he will tell your parents if you leave him?

Nee says:
UMM….YES i worry he will do bad thing for sure if i leave him

This was not the only time she said she was worried that he will do something bad . I heard I from her in person as well as on MSN almost every week for the past month. She had me convinced that she was indeed being physically held hostage in this relationship, and I just needed to wait for the right time for her to make her “escape”.

January 2009: Romeo & Juliet

The entire month of January was like a scene out of Romeo and Juliet. "N" came over to my apartment every morning at about 10AM. Her boyfriend left to work at 8AM, and she did not have to be at MBK until 1PM. For an entire month she visited me every morning, and many times I had breakfast ready for her by the time she arrived. Then we would talk and have wild sex until noon. Both of us would shower together, and I would go with her to work at MBK. I stayed at her work all day until 8PM, and then we would come back together. At Bang Sue we would part ways, she would go home to < edited by Stick>, and I would continue to travel to Nonthaburi. I patiently waited for her to find the right time to leave him; the time that would be right so as to not turn this schoolteacher into an ax-wielding stalker. During all those days that I spent at her work, I would read books (Jared Diamond) and occasionally put my engineering degree to work packing mobile phones into boxes, pro bono I must add.

January Ends With a big Punch-up and a Pregnancy

Each fight got worse than the previous one. This time <edited by Stick> punched her in the eye, and began kicking her when she fell to the ground. She managed to hit him over the head with a beer bottle in self defense. As soon as she could run out of their apartment, she took a taxi and came to my place, with a few more bags of belongings. She said that she had no more belongings left at the apartment in Bang Sue. She looked quite beat up indeed, one bloody eyeball and an assortment of black bruises on her arms and legs. This was the last straw. There is no way she could go back after such a beating. She stayed with me all the next day. Lately she had taken many days off from work due to domestic violence, and had begun to worry about her work.

That evening, <edited by Stick> called, and cried to her that he had to be admitted to the hospital to get his head stitched. Unbelievably, "N" quickly left me to go visit him, but promised to be back in an hour or two. She finally showed up 5 hours later, and told me that she is pregnant. She had gone to the hospital to visit him, and told him that it is over between them, when he demanded that she take a pregnancy test right there on the spot, since she had missed her last period. This was his trump card, and he won. Her test came back positive, and now she will have to stay with him. I know "N" always wanted a baby, so an abortion would definitely be out of the question.

My world fell apart that night. My girl was pregnant with another man’s baby. There is nothing that I can do now. I thought it was all over. By now I had lost 10kg and was beginning to show some other unhealthy signs. I could not concentrate on my job search, and had to completely give up drinking because my nerves could not handle all this stress anymore. For the first time in my life I felt like I was going to crack up and have to get admitted to a psychological institute. I had hit a very low point of my life.

D.I.Y. Medical Abortion

Two days later "N" realized that there was a chance that she could be pregnant from me. If she has this baby, the paternity will be in question. Abortion is illegal in Thailand, but there is a combination of local medicine that can be taken to carry out what is called a medical abortion. It is some Thai formula, and is called “yaa tamjai cab lao khao” and “yaa sadri”.

"N" explained it to me. Yaa tamjai is a white powder. It has to be mixed with lao kao (Thai vodka) and drank. After that, wash it down with a bottle of “yaa sadri”. Yaa sadri is taken to force the next period. Many women who have irregular periods take it just for that. But this combination taken all together is supposed to be very effective for inducing an automatic abortion. The entire cocktail costs less than 150 baht, and is available at almost all corner pharmacies around Thailand. That is what "N" told me.

I really had my doubts about this type of “snake-oil” medicine, but she called me the night she drank it, and the next day came over to see me. She was indeed bleeding very heavily, and it was not a normal period. I saw the mess, so you will have to take my word for it that she was not having a normal period. It did not look nor smell normal.

After she had gone back to him again, I decided that I need to try to distance myself from this scene. They are both cockroaches, and they should live in their own filth and excrement. This is easy to say, but hard to do if you are in love with one of the cockroaches. But I was determined to save myself from complete nervous breakdown, and as a result "N" and I met less often in February, and by the beginning of March I had almost completely pushed her out of my life.

March: The Knife Fight

Cockroaches and "N" are not easy to get rid of. I got another distressed call in the morning of March 12th. They had just finished another fight, and this time a kitchen knife was involved. "N"’s finger was slashed to the bone, and there was blood all over the apartment. Security had come and opened the door to break up the melee. I told her not to come running to me anymore. She needed to fix her problems on her own this time. That night she came over and I checked her finger. It was cut very deep, and had not been cleaned. I took her to Nonthavej, one of the best hospitals here in Nonthaburi, and paid close to 4,000 baht for the cleaning and suturing of the wound. She told me that she will pay me back when she gets the money, and I accepted her offer, since I had spent quite a bit of money on her over the previous 3 months. As a reward, I had a good romp in bed with her before we parted ways.

Rather than move in with me, she went to live with a friend for over a week, until eventually her boyfriend was able to persuade her to come back to live with him again. Later on, I found out that she never left him in the first place, but she did not want to tell me that for fear of losing me. To this day she sticks to her story that she did indeed leave him for a week.

Things Cool Down Between Us

By now it was March and I had stopped going to her work, and she had stopped visiting me in the mornings. It seemed that I could finally try to forget "N" and begin healing myself. It was very hard and painful to do, but I had to be strong. I thank all my friends who spent hours on the phone with me each night, giving me the emotional encouragement that I so desperately needed.

At the beginning of April, he roughed up "N" again, and this time she moved out to a hotel. She called me and asked me to come over, but I refused. I told her that I did not want to be involved with this anymore. It was very hard for me to refuse such an offer, but I managed to do so.

April: Newalee Back With a Vengeance

A few days later, she came over to my apartment, and was crying. She begged me through tear-soaked eyes to give her just one last chance to come back to me. She spent the following two days with me berating him, and decided to report him to the immigration police.

Apparently David’s tourist visa had been expired for almost one year now, and in addition, he is working without a work permit. "N" wanted to report him to the proper authorities, and hopefully his wife-beating ass would get thrown out of the Kingdom and with some luck, he will get blacklisted and not allowed to come back for some time. It is farang khee nok (bird shit foreigners) like him that make the good ones of us look bad. I was at the point where it would be no problem for me to do this country a favour and do myself a favour too. I accepted "N" asking me to help her, and I reported David to the immigration police. So far, nothing has been done, and he is still staying and working illegally in Thailand.

I told "N" that I could not take her in because I knew that she was still talking and meeting with her boyfriend, even though she was living in a hotel. "N"’s boss was more than eager to see it end with him, so she was paying for "N"’s hotel room, while taking her every evening in her car to search for an apartment. She asked me to spend time with "N" because she saw that this time "N" was serious about leaving him. She told me that "N" needed my emotional support, and was ready to leave him. The problem was that "N" could not afford much of an apartment with her 10,000 baht/month salary. Or should I say, she could not afford something that was up to her level of standards, and I was not willing to take her in until she cut all contact with him for at least a month. She had gone back to him enough times in the past, so I needed to be sure of her commitment to leaving him before I could commit to living with her.

So back to the scene where she is crying and begging me to please give her just one chance. The tables are now turned. I told her that if she can cut ALL contact with him for at least one month, then I will consider taking her in. I had waited patiently five months for her, a woman living with another man, while I lived alone and turned down many opportunities with other women. She had come to me many times, and left me just as many times, so now I was weary. This time she will have to leave him without any help from me, and if she could really do it, then, and only then, will I believe her. She promised to leave that animal, and gave me her pinky finger to shake, which is a sign of promise and telling the truth in Thai culture.

The Very End of Us

"N"’s foray into living alone lasted all but one week. Just after Songkran (April 19 to be precise), she went back to live with him. I took all of her belongings that she had accumulated in my apartment since December and dropped them off at her work on Sunday when I knew she had the day off. As far as I know, David planned to please her by promising to move out of < edited by Stick> into a house. "N" continued to lie to her boss for another month that she was living alone. She was ashamed to tell her that paying for her hotel and taking time after work driving around apartment-hunting had all been in vain.

At the end of May, "N" tried to contact me a few times, and I told her clearly each time to leave me alone. Since then, I have heard very little from her.

Now the narrator’s voice interrupts the story. The narrator is me, and I have learned a lot more in the past few weeks. Things are not what they had seemed to be all along. Let us start by going back to the point where "N" had just moved from Roi Et into her nice expensive apartment in Bang Na. She had just started working for the tour company at 40,000 baht/month, plus 6,000 baht/month accommodation allowance.


“Tom, how could you have been so gullible? There was no 40,000 baht/month job. In fact, she was unemployed the entire time you were shagging her in that apartment. Did you not find it strange that when you stayed there on the occasional weekday, she did not go to work? Nor did she call in sick.

The apartment was paid for by a man who came to Thailand frequently on business. The man is the C.E.O. of a Danish multinational company that had recently set up office in Thailand. Their new office is located on Sri Nakarin Road, only a few kilometers from "N"’s apartment. Did you never question why "N" was living in Bang Na, way out in the sticks?

This fellow is big fish. He probably has a wife and kids back home in Denmark, but it is understandable that he pay a little more and have his own apartment and girl waiting for him in Thailand rather than having to stay in a hotel room. In return, the girl can take care of the place while he is gone, and live there free. Both parties win. However, I am sure that it was not in the deal that she bring other men to shag in the same bed. If you do not believe this, then I can tell you the name and email address of this man, but not here on this website! Tom, you really got duped on that one!”

Now flashback to the scene where "N" got my email and found out that Jean had gone with me to Canada:


“Remember how bad you were Tom, breaking "N"’s heart. It was the end of August 2008, and she had just lost her job with the Chinese tour company (which you know now she never existed). She had just moved to a cheaper apartment across the road, and was crying over you alone in her new place for two weeks, until one morning she woke up on her bathroom floor with her head resting on top of the toilet. It was after those two weeks that she found her job at MBK, in September. But it was not so:

I have found out from her boss that she started working at MBK in July. She was not unemployed and crying over you, alone in her apartment for the first two weeks of September. Flashback to her email sent at the end of August":

teerak tomorow i have packing my bag for new apartment work finish already…we have 2 girl go to phuket and 3 quit. in phuket have more tourist that why they want to move and u know now low season last month we have only 200 tourist come…very sad ..but i have interviwe new job already but i will start in next 3 months ..i must find someting do while i wait for that job .

"All a complete lie, Tom. Did you know that she met her boyfriend about the same time that you went to Canada (July), and not September like she had claimed?

You now realize that she met him before she even found out about Jean going to Canada with you, don't you? She was never alone and unemployed crying over you. And now come to think of it, there is another thing I can speculate:

She never moved to the cheaper apartment across the street in Bang Na. That would not make sense, since now that you know she was already working at MBK, Bang Na would be too far to commute from to work every day. I am bloody sure that at the end of August, she moved to live with him in < edited by Stick>. So the time that she claimed to be living alone and crying over you, she was actually living with him already. And she had the nerve to make you feel guilty that you were not there to help her move her belongings. Remember the last line of her email that I have shown our audience so far. She was actually moving to live with him":

teerak many thing for carry..need some help form u teerak but u not here…Did u miss me? teerak u feel better now? …i will happy to hear form u…"N"

"And she had the nerve to ask you in November to leave Jean for her! Now you see how cold and calculating that was! After destroying your relationship with Jean, it was still not enough for her. She kept you hanging on for another 5 months, giving you hope that she would soon find the right time cease being hostage to her abusive boyfriend and unhappy relationship. It boggles my mind that there are people out there, living among us, who can act this way.

Why did she leave the expensive apartment in Bang Na? Did the C.E.O. find out that she was parading men into his apartment while he was away and finally kick her out?

Why does "N" say that she owes 18,000 baht to the second apartment? Because she was not able to pay, they kept all of her belongings. But now we can be almost sure that there was no second apartment. That means the 18,000 baht collateral is also a lie. What happened to her new notebook computer she had at the time you met her – the same notebook that she used to meet you and < edited by Stick>? It is possible that the notebook belonged to the C.E.O., or even possible that she sold it. Only she knows, Tom.

As for her situation with the boyfriend, I can only speculate that he has something she needs. He beats her, which is a fact. She complains much about him, not only to you but to others. Her actions did not show that she truly loves him. How could she love him and shag you for 4 months while living with him? The only reason I can speculate that she stays with him is that he is helping her a lot financially and/or he has promised something great for her in the future (such as a house after they get married, or a visa to the U.K.)

It is even possible that her reasons for staying are not this ambitious. Having found a gullible buffoon who believes all her lies without question gives her the security that he will not find out about her sordid past and she will be able to manipulate and deceive him in the future After all, teachers are not known to ask questions since they have to know it all in the first place. Quite the opposite to us engineers, who are always asking questions. Moving out would mean an instant downgrade to the lifestyle she has gotten used to, and to start all over with a new man comes with a lot of risk. In the end, time will reveal the truth.

Tom, you have a university degree and over 10 years work experience in cutting-edge companies as an electronics engineer. You speak 3 languages (Thai does not count). You have traveled around the world alone. You have been shot at, you have been mugged, you have been lost in the jungle, only to name a few of what you have been through. But you survived and learned. Yet, a Thai woman with only a high school degree who has not ventured farther from Thailand than Taiwan was able to deceive you, and do it so well. Not to mention that she is 10 years younger than you!

From now on, trust your instincts. They have saved your life before, and in hindsight, you can now see that they were right back when she grabbed your nuts at the pub in Roi Et. And one last thing, do recall what Sun Tzu wrote in The Art of War: ‘Never under-estimate the enemy’. You read the book only months before you started your world travels. You should have taken heed.

Had you been smart, you could have avoided all this heartache and wasted effort; however it would have been a shame not to have such a story like this one to share with the rest of the world. What a strange trip it has been, all without a backpack…"

Stickman's thoughts:

I really don't understand you. You fell for a girl because, let's face it, the sex was good. Sex and love are different, baby! You scoff off at an English teacher with no money yet admit you live in a shitty room despite having a so-called decent job?! And then you had a girlfriend for several months who you kept as a backup plan which is exactly what "N" was doing to you.

I don't like it that you sent this with people's identities either – which I subsequently removed. Note to readers: sorry for the heavy editing.

There is something I have to say here and please to all you Canadians, don't take offence. I have found the Canadians to be a great bunch, friendly and for the most part they give a great impression of their country to the point it is a place I'd like to visit. But man oh man, when you read these "Thai girl did me wrong" stories it is Canadians who get hit hardest. Countless times it is the poor Canadian. I have no idea why that is, but there is a definite trend!