Stickman Readers' Submissions June 22nd, 2009

Who is a Whore?



Who is a whore? Dictionary or any Wiki page tells that a person is a whore if he or she provides sexual service in exchange of money. While sex, service and money all of these three words are of immense significance service and money carries less clarity than the word sex because money can be hard cash or can be other types of economic benefits. And to understand service better in this context we can presuppose that this is always provided in exchange of financial benefits willingly or unwillingly since sex is not provided by Salvation Army.

So when a wife sleeps with her husband because she is getting a better life, a monthly allowance to buy what she wishes to and denies her husband of sex when her husband fails to maintain the same level of support can be counted as a whore undoubtedly. And possibly they are worst kind of whore. There will be ups and downs in sexual life and that is very normal. We are human beings with our stress, mood swings and many other imperfections which affect our love life but it shouldn’t be proportional to the pecuniary benefits received. On the other hand if a wife tries her best to provide sex even though sometimes it stretches her limits because she loves her husband and grateful for what he has done for her life and she wants to make him happy and seeing him happy makes her happy then she is not a whore. I have seen such cases where a Thai lady got married with a farang initially to in an effort to get out of some imminent financial troubles or curse of destitution but over the course of her relationship has discovered love in her partner and has been with him along all the undulations of life. They are not clearly whores because they have deeper feelings for their partners which don’t fluctuate like mood swings of bar girl.

He Clinic Bangkok

A bar girl who just entered the bar scene and looking for a way out of her drudgery by marrying a farang is still a whore technically to the customers she is providing her service. Now lets say she finds a suitable man who can provide her the necessary financial stability and leaves the bar scene with at least an intention of leaving permanently. Even though her desires are true to herself it is still highly dependent on the farang having to provide that expected stability on an ongoing basis. Would her love and frequency of love making reduce if the farang fails to carryout his promise due to financial setback beyond his control such as loss of job? If so then she clearly is a whore.

Now over the course of life as I have said before, many of them may discover love in their husbands or partners and would transcend from a whore to a lover. And many of them will not. Both are possible and their behavior and reactions to the vicissitudes of life would be very different. And with time they will prove to themselves and others who they are.

Now especially this is true for a Thai bar girl more so than the whores I have seen in other countries, they can be a whore to a farang but a lover to her Thai husband. So when you call her a whore she is a whore to you when she is giving you the pleasure in exchange of money that may not be true for her Thai boyfriend or husband. Another weird case where I have seen a bar girl who was my friend had a farang lover from US. They had an open relationship means when her lover stayed in Pattaya she never went out with any other man but when he was away both of them went for short time service one to receive in order to pacify the hormonal needs other to give for money. And this behavior was agreed upon and mutually accepted. So Nui for sure was a whore to whom ever she provided the short time service but to her farang lover she was a girl friend.

CBD bangkok

So I guess the question to ask is sex being provided purely in exchange of economic benefits. If the answer is yes and by the way the answer is only resides in the ladies heart then she is a whore to whom she is providing sex. On the other hand if she harbors a deeper feeling for that man beyond just a perception of cold hard service even though it is in exchange of financial benefits she may not be considered a whore in the context of that relationship. Many times on the surface her behavior may look exactly like a whore in case when the farang failed to provide the expected monetary stability, at a deeper level she would be sad, depressed and lonely to leave the relationship knowing her helplessness from her strong sense of obligations for her kids or parents which has forced her to choose money over her love. How can we call her a whore if we don’t know her mind? And most of the times we will not know her mind.

While contemplating the answer to this question I remember a quotation from Dhammapada “We are what we think. All that we are arises from our thoughts”. Even though two ladies from their outwardly behavior may look alike what lies in the obscure nooks of their mind may determine who they are.

Stickman's thoughts:

It will be interesting to see Korski's findings based on feedback from readers.

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