Readers' Submissions

Thai Thoughts and Anecdotes Part 211

  • Written by Dana
  • May 30th, 2009
  • 5 min read


HURTS THE HEAD

"Too much thinking hurts the head." This is a common thing for a Thai female to say. Westerners often use this Thai plaintive as a touchstone for a critical essay on the lack of curiosity and mental rigor of Thais. Really? Well, maybe from our point of view; but 'every dog has his day', and almost every idea is the right idea at least one time. When I was younger I knew everything. The older I get the less I know; and sometimes just thinking about stuff in the Kingdom 'hurts the head' for me too. To wit:


There is a new girl on the boardwalk. Her name is Ping, or Ting; ok, that is not really the point. No wait; maybe it was Fing. Ok, no idea. The point is that there is a new candy on the candy counter. Just like my Fa, she is on station every morning around 9:30; and she sits on the bench opposite the A.A. Hotel. She is a little different than many of the boardwalk regulars. How so?


Well, it is in her newness. She is not a broken toy. She is not a skank. She is not a whore in appearance or in demeanor. She is not drug addled. She is not tattooed, or motorbike accident scarred, or blank faced due to an empty brain. And she is not staring old age in the face. Like I said: she is new. Sitting next to her in the early morning sun and looking at her hands, and her arms, and her shoulders, and her face, and her legs, and her feet all you can think of is the ineffable irresistible pull of youth and sexuality in the young woman. Then there is you. Don't think about it.


She is young, about twenty-two; hard to tell with Thai females. Could be eighteen or could be twenty five. No matter. Golden brown tight soft skin that exudes a siren call of sex. She is Thai featured, and she is Thai slim. It is impossible not to speculate about her physically. A new woman right out of the box and on display. She dresses well. Not extravagantly, but as if she had a job in a bank. Impossible not to notice her. Subsequent investigation by me finds that she has just had a baby. Somewhere there is a baby and this 'new girl' is a mother. Sitting on the bench in the sun thinking of her child. Waiting for farang fools and their foolish money to pay for her room, and her life, and her clothes, and her child: a human that came out of her body and calls for her in the middle of the night. Best not to think too much about it.


I sit next to her and chat. I'm really waiting for Fa, but I am a friendly person. She plays along a little bit until it becomes obvious that I am waiting for Fa and just wasting her time. Then she shuts down. Business woman. Baby expenses. Motherhood maturity. Her charms are doled out to payers, not chatty tourists. I should move over out of respect, but I stay rooted to the bench next to her out of pride. One whore and one fool. Not really something you want to think about.


Oh good, here comes Fa. She is on the other side of Beach road, and she is smiling at me, and she looks great, and she motions for me to cross the street. But I have brought my camera for pictures so I get her to cross the street and come over to the bench where Ting (Ping, Sing, Ming, Ling?) and I are sitting. She sits down with us. She knows my early morning companion and there is an exchange. Anyway, after I have badgered Fa with the pictures routine she asks me if I would like to take them both.


Fa trying to help her friend. Just business. Sex is meaningless. Her friend needs money. Fa understands because she has also just given birth. Last time I visited the Kingdom I nearly choked with her breast fluid surging down my throat. Two brand new mothers and one farang. What a situation. Never say never. The less than one year old baby of Fa's is somewhere in an apartment on Soi 10 being watched by someone while Fa is cruising the boardwalk. Easy money. One thousand baht a day without trying. A six hour day and a four day week yields four thousand baht with no expenses and no taxes. Enough money to be a good mother.


I say "No" to Fa's offer. I am experienced enough to know that it will not be any fun; and besides, I just want to spend time with Fa. I'm a one woman man. The offer does make me speculate though. The sex for these business women is meaningless; so there is no philosophic, or moral weight pulling and stretching at the lifestyle. It is an easy way to make a living, and they get two months off during the slow season. If you can ignore the sexual contacts, and ignore the moral issues, and ignore the opinions of others; it looks like a good lifestyle choice. Maybe. Don't really want to think about it too much.


Ok, I'm not sitting here with two college educated women from Boston; but I am sitting here with two girls next to me. Sometimes proximity trumps everything else. I believe I have made the right choice. Still, the mind does wander and this leads me to 'hurt my head'. In eighteen years will Fa's child be sitting here on the bench with us? Will she be doing what her mother does? Will I be the only one who finds that a little bump in the mental road? Will I be tempted? Will Fa offer me her child? Of course she will. Just business.


Thailand. Too much thinking 'hurts the head'. I take Fa's hand and we walk across Beach Road to my hotel. Another fabulous start to another wonderful day in Thailand. Climbing the marble steps and holding the heavy glass door for Fa, I wonder what she looked like a long time ago when she was eighteen; and if it is her retired South Pattaya boulevard whore mother who is watching the baby.


As Fa and I are going up in the elevator my head starts to hurt.

Thai Dating, Singles and Personals

Stickman's thoughts:

When they say "you think too mutt" it drives me wild, because it is one of the dumbest things a person can say.