Stickman Readers' Submissions December 6th, 2008

Why SE Asia Is An Overrated Piece Of Manure

First of all, people seem to get the impression that SE Asia is a great tourist destination. To each his own. If you're in to beaches, vices, and overrated bullshit, than SE Asia is for you. Otherwise, hear me out.

Lets get in to vices. Now before you whine MY CULTURE HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT! lets just get fucking real here. Some would say I am sugar coating if I were to dismiss say, Japanese discrimination. This, despite the fact that one could CONCEIVABLY take a two-week trip to Japan and be surprised at the LACK of bigotry. Can we say the same thing about SE Asia and rampant vice? Hell no. So shut the fuck up. Please.

mens clinic bangkok

Now back to vice. No, you are not being served drugs by clad gentleman on a silver platter in a den full of liberal and safety minded companions. It's dipshit pushers like anywhere else. Don't buy from them, you fool.

Hookers? Yeah, a step up from anywhere else. Khmer hookers are surprisingly polite. Thailand specializes in this sort of thing. Nothing notable about Filipina hookers other than how rampant they are. In fact, precisely BECAUSE prostitution is so rampant, you might even meet a NICE hooker. Should you give a shit? NO.

Go anywhere else in the world and all you have to do is buy her a drink and dinner, a few compliments, and the possibility of a green card. Do it in SE Asia and you have to ask if she's a whore or a transsexual first, and that's not the best way to start a conversation. A MAN HAS THE RIGHT TO BUY A WOMAN A DRINK WITHOUT WONDERING IF SHE IS A PROSTITUTE OR TRANSSEXUAL. YES, IT IS THAT RAMPANT IN SE ASIA. DO NOT GO TO BARS OR CLUBS FOR PHONE NUMBERS. PS SE Asians stop becoming trannies damn that shit is nasty.

Also, SE Asians are aggressive shitty businessmen. It's fucking annoying. Dealing with both passivity and then bullshit on a daily basis until it rots your soul. That's what SE Asia feels like.

Cambodia is poor. The women are friendly, but are generally conservative both culturally and sexually (unless they're prostitutes), so it is not an ideal place to meet women. The internet is as slow as whale shit (so, if you are reading this and use the internet you shouldn't go to Cambodia). It is very poor, yet no cheaper than Thailand. Beggars, orphans, and poverty everywhere. I would actually have liked Cambodia best, if it weren't so damned FILTHY, even near good restaurants. Guys, let me introduce you to a bar of soap. Then you will want to try Thailand

THAILAND: Surprisingly boring, Khao San road is an overrated piece of shit, and most Thais would agree. Don't go there; no need to write an essay about it. Find out if there is another interesting point of reference. Thailand is boring; food is good but not as good as you'd think; plainly not a match for Japanese or French cuisine. Piss poor nightlife although too many claim otherwise. Eventually, you will get tired of being referred to as "Farang" despite it being a supposedly neutral term. Thailand is not a bad destination, but it simply does not deserve all the tourism it gets, unless you're Australian or a sex tourist I suppose. While not the worst place to meet women, they get enough tourists, and know the reputation Thailand has, so don't count on playing the exotic card. While this sounds like a moot point, it really isn't.

Malaysia: I wasn't there long enough to form a good judgment. Surprisingly nice guys, but I still wouldn't call Kuala Lumpur a notable tourist destination.

wonderland clinic

Philippines: Ah, the joke of the century. Easily the worst place on this list. At first, it appears wealthier, and thus more presentable than Cambodia. A bit cleaner, and better internet too, but there it falls apart. Lets take a look at this:

VISA SITUATION: Only 21 days, have to pay for an extension. Moreover, airports charge for both ENTRY and DEPARTURE. That's right; that cheap plane ticket ain't so cheap anymore.

BEACHES: Only went to Boracay, contrived.

People: Filipinos are the most inefficient people logically possible. They are aggressive shit businessmen even by SE Asian standards. Their society is vice crippled even by SE Asian standards, with no redeeming features (i.e. their hookers aren't as polite as Khmer hookers).

They help tourists, but then go on to demand money in return. Many beggars and orphans, but unlike Cambodia there is just no excuse for that crap. While Filipinos have some hospitality skills, manners are by no means refined, not even professionally. Cambodia made some nasty mistakes and deserves a short term break. Philippines royally fucked over their own country despite a democratic government and no need for defense. Food is crap; it is not a place renowned for its cuisine.

WOMEN: Ugh, don't let the nurses, mail order brides and e-sluts fool you; this is the LAST place you should look for a lady. Don't expect any intellectual classy ladies here; that requires efficiency beyond the capacity of this sick culture. Oh, and if you did happen to meet one, there is a striking chance of Chinese blood; no seriously I'm not Chinese.

Fellow tourists, China is underrated. So, I guess if you've been to China and liked it, stick with it and avoid SE Asia is like a plague.

Eventually, constant harassment from beggars, orphans, salesmen, tuktuks, drug dealers, prostitutes, transsexuals, will make you feel more like an objectified money / dipshit machine more than any other place you have been to. Do NOT go to SE Asia, do NOT give in to the hype.

Stickman's thoughts:

Quite funny really in that you have obviously spent quite a bit of time in the region. Sure, the region may not be up to Western standards and it is undeniable that many of the problems you outline exist, but your rant is completely without balance. I am sure someone could do the same sort of hatchet job on your country…

nana plaza