Readers' Submissions

Still in Heaven

  • Written by Anonymous
  • December 19th, 2008
  • 4 min read


Black Pagoda Patpong Bangkok


I feel compelled to write a positive letter about my marriage to a wonderful person. I read and see (first hand) so many bad or mediocre relationships / stories I must bring to light those couples whom live normal, predominately blissful lives. I am certain there are many excellent relationships, but of course, most of those posted lean towards the opposite direction.

I first wrote a post dating back to June 22, 2004 entitled “Through the Gauntlet to Heaven”. This was the very beginning of my life as I now enjoy it and hopefully will forever.

My wife and I do not have a perfect relationship as there is no such thing. What we do have is a rock solid friendship embodied by trust, kindness, respect, honesty, and complete dedication to each other. The lady I married is absolutely wonderful. She is the most caring, thoughtful, and sincere person I have ever had the pleasure of having in my life.

We have our ups and downs but very few compared to any relationship whether it be mixed or not. We are very best friends and have been from the day we first met. The only problems we have include communication (I am not talking of pidgen English but advanced language skills) and her infrequent habit of not speaking her mind.

I am a strong believer in reaping what you sow and you get what you paid for. If we encounter a disagreement we talk things through in an intelligent and mutually respectful manner. We both want a lifelong relationship so therefore everything we do or say is focused upon achieving this goal. I did not marry a lady many years younger than I as I felt the relationship would be less likely to succeed – this is my opinion but certainly strongly supported by many examples within the relationship graveyard. I also married a lady that held the same dreams, goals, aspirations, and moral ground as I do. Finally, her education and work experience is one to be admired, rivaling and mostly surpassing any western woman I may have courted along my life as a single male.

I am not sure how to respond to those whom write that they would “never marry a Thai lady” or “the only Thai ladies whom would entertain a farang are gold diggers or only doing such for the family's welfare”. My wife is her own person yet reliant upon me. She will not be taken advantage of but will always offer the kindest of gestures to those in need. She will back my decisions 100% but not always in full agreement (in these cases only I would know – not her family or friends – only me).

Thai woman are different from others in many ways. My wife, for example, is kind, considerate, sincere, feminine, soft spoken, fashion conscious, inquisitive, and very strong (compared to other Thai ladies). Additionally, she is very sexual but never partook in the industry – she just enjoys it. She goes to the gym several times per week for herself and for me – she loves being attractive for me. She enjoys being a woman and has a very hard time accepting the boisterous personalities and mannerisms flaunted by so many of the American woman in our locality. She views their “masculinity” as a reflection of our society and the fact the woman want the same power as men so therefore emulate the American male; I am soft spoken but carry a very heavy stick. Granted, some Thai woman can be overly emotional, immature, unrealistic, greedy, cruel, and generally disinterested – sounds akin to my ex American wife.

My wife is what a wife should be – she is completely dedicated, always considerate, and so very kind. I am not an easy man to please or live with. I have a very big ego, (sometimes) a short temper, and am occasionally quick to criticize. However, she brings the very best out of me in a very gentle way. She truly makes me a better person and personifies the term of “the better half”. Whether at home, work, or with family or friends she tempers my personality to an acceptable and even personable level.

For all the negative men out there I don’t know how to respond other than either I made the right choice or you have not. As in my first post – patience, high standards, and objective thinking are key – just like anything else in life or I must just be DAMN lucky.

This is my opinion and life. Some may have the same experiences, others not, I really do not care – I am the happiest I have ever been in my entire life. If you are not happy only you control your destiny. Hell – you are the one that put yourself there in the first place.

Thank you my love for being the most beautiful person I know and the very best friend I have ever had.

Happy Holidays and Chock Dee,

(Still) Lucky

Stickman's thoughts:

Many will be very envious of you.