First Day On Holiday In Pattaya
Mid afternoon, checked in, unpacked, and let loose. Ahhhh…my first day on holiday in Pattaya and the world is my oyster. All my problems, responsibilities, commitments are far away across the ocean. Walking down Soi 7 my impression is the same as when I taxied in early, what a seaside dump. I walked across Beach Road. It was hot but not fierce. It was humid but not uncomfortable. A sea breeze flicked through my loose fitting cotton shirt and cooled the sweat beads that were filming over my skin. My legs ambled along the concrete path that ran adjacent to the beach with my arms swinging loosely by my side. I was in no hurry. I was on holiday!
My ears listened and my eyes watched. The clatter of the street vendors, the hammer of the construction sites, the whine of the motor bikes and the sing-song of the voices as I passed by all mixed together in a din of excitement. My eyes danced from scene to scene but no eye contact was made and a gentle movement of my hand was all that was needed to signal I was not buying. A street vendor selling freshly squeezed orange juice however caught my eye and increased my thirst and I purchased.
A plastic bag filled with fresh orange juice and a straw was exchanged for 20 baht and I made my way to a nearby vacant bench. I sat and drank. I watched and listened. I closed my eyes and listened to my breath. I felt the swing of life inside, and I felt good. I sighed with a deep breath and opened my eyes to the swing of life outside and everything was new again. I noticed the three young women sitting opposite me and they neither looked happy nor sad, just sort of vacant.
Too late, one caught my eye and a helloooo and smile sprang to her face in anticipation. I hated to disappoint her eagerness; I smiled with a gentle shake of my head and was on my way.
I walked and I strolled and I strolled and I walked and I smiled and I ambled and felt as loose as a goose. I eventually found myself ordering a chicken kebab from a kebab vendor in Walking Street. It was so good I ordered another. I looked at my watch. 7:00. What to do? Back in Farangland at this time of the evening I would have just sat in my comfy chair for the nightly news followed by a couple of hours of TV viewing and into bed for a 6 AM wake up.
I scanned up Walking Street and spotted a nice little bar that seemed to be part of Walking Street itself. I liked the decor and the open view of the streetscape so I sat on a stool and ordered a san something or other beer and relaxed. And it was relaxing. Good service, genuine smile and no bar girls. I ordered another. A very attractive ladyboy appeared on the stool beside me and after a bit of posturing inquired about my health, at least I think that was what she was asking. Anyway, as gentle as I could I told her to fuck off and she went on her way.
I paid my tab and headed off in the direction of my hotel when a toilet sign directed me down the end of an arcade. I paid my 10 baht, did the business and directly outside the exit when leaving were two security men ushering people into a gogo bar. I think it was opening time and without a thought I sort of joined the crowd and went on in. I immediately spotted a small high table and stool with my name on it. A beer was forthcoming and I settled back and watched the show. A parade of a dozen or so girls with little on meandered slowly across a stage, about 10 metres in front of me, from one side to the other stopping at each of the 5 poles in place for a little wiggle. It was a production line of sorts and as a girl left the stage on the right hand side a new girl joined on the left hand side.
Thankfully I was left alone to enjoy the show and soak up the atmosphere. And it was a lively fun place too, not sleazy at all. During this time of 3 to 4 relaxing beers, at about 40 minute intervals all the lights in the place would start flashing and the girls would vacate the stage to be replaced by half a dozen other girls who were obviously the star attractions as they had no clothing on at all. They were also very friendly with each other in a rather unnatural way. I was glad these main events only lasted 10 minutes as I found it a bit embarrassing.
Anyway after a couple of hours I had had enough and was just finishing my beer to go when 2 maidens appeared either side of me. They smiled and spoke and nodded their heads and I joined in and smiled and nodded my head and 3 drinks turned up. I must have said yes to this so I just thought ah well I’m on holidays I’ll go with the flow.
And it was delightful. They somehow managed to talk and laugh with themselves without ignoring me and I just loved listening to their sweet voices and watching them enjoying themselves. They had no tops on as well which was rather cute. Periodically their work friends would drop by say hello, stay a few minutes and then go on their way. Once the older of the two put my arm around her waist and placed my hand on her soft firm stomach and whispered in my ear “you can touch my breasts, 10 minute 300 baht”. The temptation and lust that flowed through my body was like a shot of adrenalin. It is still a luscious memory. I somehow declined, but left my hand on her stomach for a few more minutes so as to not offend before withdrawing.
A bit later the same girl asked if she could sleep with me at my loom “1000 baht short time 2000 baht long time”. Again I said no but she wasn’t offended and seemed happy enough to just keep my company and drink her lady drinks. The other girl who was very petite was starting to get drunk (she’d only had a couple or maybe 3, tops) and she was making me laugh, matter of fact the 3 of us were all enjoying each other’s company. When the tiny one said she wanted to go to Lucifer's Disco I thought it would be a fun thing to do and I wanted to shout them a good time away from their job as well.
I paid their bar fine. They were very excited and ran off to get some clothes on. While they were getting changed I counselled myself on the wisdom of this decision but I was now well under the influence of alcohol (and the 2 maidens) and said to myself “go with the flow-don’t worry about it. You’re on holiday and you’re only going to a disco”.
We strolled out into the street and the first hit of night air took me back a bit and a cautionary little voice said “you’ve had a few”, but with a happy little maiden holding tightly to each arm and skipping along happily the little voice was totally overwritten and put to bed.
Lucifer's was revolting. It was the loudest disco I’d ever been in; the drinks were watered down and way over the top expensive. My mood was in danger and the girls sensed it and suggested we go and thank God we did. The petite one wanted something to eat and led me to my surprise, to a 7 Eleven and purchased microwave noodles. The other one said she was watching her weight. Well she was doing a good job of it because I thought her figure was just right. We all found something quite funny in 7 Eleven (I forget what) because we ended up back on Walking Street in fits of laughter. My mood was definitely way up there and when the petite one suggested that she now wants to sleep with me too, I had an outer body experience and heard myself boast “hell I’ll sleep with both of you”.
Next thing you know I’m sitting in the back of one of those taxi truck things heading up to Soi 7 with the wind in my hair and my 2 new favourite girls wrapped either side of me, listening to their sing song voices chatting away, and most pleasing of all was they were completely at ease with me. It’s a memory I’ll cherish to the grave. It’s a smile on my face as I rock in my chair that my wife won’t understand. Oh yeah, didn’t I tell you, I’m married, been married for thirty years. But that’s far far away in Farangland.
We got back to the hotel and they checked in with security and headed for the lift. I shyly inquired with the security if everything was ok, (I think I was secretly hoping for a red light), but they waved good-naturedly in the direction of the girls “yes yes go go”. Into the room, giggles, TV on, jumping on the bed and then off to the shower for a good soaping (that was nice). Off to the king-sized bed. “Light off, light off” squeaked the petite one, and for the life of me I couldn’t locate the correct switch. Being my first night at the hotel there must have been an overriding switch somewhere that I couldn’t locate and I give up after about 5 minutes.
I then lay on the bed while the girls in their nakedness and near nakedness danced around looking and trying to find the elusive switch, while I enjoyed the show. They eventually gave up and came to bed for the main event, and my enjoyment promptly ended.
It was all wrong and I just could not get into it. The girls tried though, what with one at my top half and the other at the other half, but I just couldn’t relax. On the contrary I was anxious. I don’t know whether it was the beer or the guilt or the knowledge that I was going to now have another skeleton in the closet to haunt me. I had a few in there already from my initial visits to LOS, one a big one from my first trip that caused me to return 3 months later to get it out of my head, and the other couple from my third trip to LOS when I tried unsuccessfully to be a butterfly.
I’d sort of cleaned these skeletons out when I told my wife about these indiscretions one night over a few beers back in Farangland. I picked the right moment and she was pretty cool about it. A slap on the wrists, a tsk tsk tsk, a small lecture how she felt I was a better man than that, but however “I was just a man”. We even laughed it off (just a little) and she never mentioned it again and she even let me return to Thailand for other holidays.
And I did return to Bangkok 3 more times and Phuket once and I enjoyed my holidays without taking any girls back to my loom. (I really like LOS for a holiday, other affordable holidays were boring in comparison). I was going to try a massage parlour telling myself that they didn’t count; I stood outside Annie's a couple of times but just couldn’t go in. I even walked past Lolita’s on recommendation, but a couple of the ugliest looking girls I’ve ever seen come rushing out towards me and I ran for my life.
I felt pretty proud of myself…up to this point. I finished with the girls as quick and as politely as I could. I now just wanted to be on my own and suffer in silence. However a complication, I’d spent most of my money in my wallet and other money was in the reception's safe till morning. I had just enough to pay one girl ST and the other girl agreed to stay LT till morning. That was a long night. I couldn’t sleep with a Thai girl beside me and I just had to lie there and think with a roaring headache. Small mercies though…the light turned off?
I try to find a positive from all situations though and I didn’t beat myself up too much the next day (I’d done enough of that during the night)… I’d had a stumble and I was going to learn by it. And what did I learn… “If a man’s going to hang around in a gogo bar in the sex capital of the world and then add alcohol to the equation and think he’s strong enough to resist temptation, welllll I think it would be like an unsupervised 5 year old being in a lolly shop and expecting him not to taste one”. Is any child that good? …That was my self- counselling anyway.
Will I go back to Thailand again… Hmmm… I don’t usually go into gogo venues anyhow; I’m usually content with the beer bars and a streetscape. I could go there and give the bars a miss…but that’s one of my main attractions, the vibrant street nightlife. I could go to the bars and not drink alcohol…nah tried that, several times, and bloody boring.
I thing I’ll be back (when the Aussie $ improves), but only when my wife and I’s holidays coincide and we both choose Thailand as a destination. But then I’ll have to go to the temples and shopping centres and markets and day trips, when all I’ll want to do during the day is lay around the pool.
Ah well, you can’t have everything…OR CAN YOU??????
Thoroughly interesting and honest read. I bet you are not the only one who has had stage fright.