Readers' Submissions

The Sexuality Factor

  • Written by Anonymous
  • July 5th, 2008
  • 9 min read


Black Pagoda Patpong Bangkok


Last week I told you guys to never marry a whore eh? That when it comes to whores it is better to rent, but not buy! And that the reason men come to Thailand and marry whores is because whores in Thailand are a good value compared to say Canadian whores. It is good to review eh? I would not want you guys to forget these important things. This week I want to dig further between your ears, where most of you keep the “paint ball”, and examine WHY you are willing to marry a whore in more detail, AND also why even if you are bright enough to not marry your whore, why you are willing to put up with so much shit from her even if she is only a live-in whore, a girlfriend whore, or whatever it makes you feel all warm and fuzzy to call the sweet little lady of everyones evening.

Let us men of the world (Aha Wendigo is a man from out of this world, remember what I told you about how he got his name? HAHAHAHAHA) discuss this issue with class eh? No need to jump on your discount laptop computer and bang out some hate mail just because of symantecs eh? (Thank you Peter!) Just because we call a whorse of a different color different names, let us men not have hard feelings among each other. Remember my fellow expatriates: BROS BEFORE WHORES. If you remember to always put your BROS word, needs, and priority BEFORE that of your WHORE, then we can all be mens of the world together. After all, do not you for a German second (some day I will tell you a funny German ethnic joke) forget that Thai whores will ALWAYS put their fellow whore sisters above their boy friends, lovers, and even husbands. This is just a natural thing to do. Only western men are so gullible and stupid to think if they give priority to their whore, that it will be returned. Nonsense!!!

Okay, we begin eh? We have all heard of the stories of Thai whores having temper tantrums, vaginal lapses in judgment, threatening to kill themselves, slashing your tires on your 20,000 baht motor scooter (HAHAHAHA, let us pause. What kind of expatriate CHUMP rides a cheap motor scooter around town eh? Besides having a Thai whore on your arm in public, can anyone here think of any thing more degrading? I digress again. AnyWho, we have all heard the stories of how Thai whores lose their tempers, feel like revenge, or some other shitty mindset, and then set out to make their farang man pay the price and hear all about it. I shit you not! What about that loser who wrote to the Misses Stick and asked if it was NORMAL for his Thai whore to pull a knife on him! NORMAL TO PULL A FUCKING KNIFE ON HIM? I tell you what, any loser who needs to ask Misses Stick if this is normal deserves to have a knife pulled on him so he can increase his chances of being removed from the gene pool!!!

I hate to bring this up but it needs to be said. Thailand leads the world in assaults on the penis. More men get their penis whacked off (no, not jerking off, I’m talking some sick Thai whore cuts it off with a blade) in Thailand by crazed whores than in any other country. I can predict the future. Some chump is going to raise his hand and say “it is not only whores, woman from all walks of Thai life are whacking off mens penises!” Sigh.. have you morons not been listening to me when my lips move? Are you really going to argue that ANY woman who would whack off your penis is NOT a whore? Really? Only a dickless wonder would argue that one. HAHAHAHAHA I’m sure we have one or two regular dickless readers.

So why is it eh? Why is it men are willing to put up with such poor behavior? PUSSY! It is all about pussy. Men can be so stupid, and women know it. They know that you are so glad to have access to their pussys, that you will put up with anything they can dish out to have continued access. All they have to do to get their way, to make you behave, to get you to do the dishes, to make you cancel your night out with the BROS, is to give you THAT LOOK, that look you know means “NO PUSSY TONIGHT, TOMORROW, OR UNTIL YOU LEARN TO KISS MY ASS LIKE A GOOD LITTLE BOY!” All women use their pussys to control men, but Thai whores have perfected the technique and are better at it than any other women in the world. Why is this you ask eh? I will tell you!

I call this the “SEXUALITY FACTOR!” Last week we discussed that the average chump gets a much better looking whore in Thailand, than the same money will buy in your home country. MORE WHORE FOR THE MONEY. Simply put, Thai whores are much more attractive, hence more desirable, therefore a man who tends to be pussy whipped will put up with MUCH greater levels of OUTRAGEOUS BEHAVIOR from a Thai whore than a whore/lady from any other country. You look at their small petite bodies, their firm breasts, long legs, tanned brown and soft skin, and tight ass, and combine that with the sexual skills of a true master and you want them more than you’ve ever wanted a woman. Multiple the sexuality factor by a 10 if the Thai whore is 10 years younger than you, 50 if she is 20 years younger than you, and 100 if she is 30 of more years younger than you.

Of course I am assuming you were at least smart enough to hook up with a good looking Thai whore. I am saving for another day, a submission, about how men who don’t even have brain damage will choose ugly Thai whores. (there seems to be a lot of these, but I research the topic of “brain damage” further to make sure there really is not some disease responsible for such atrocious choices in whores.)

HAHAHAHA, me just thinked up a good example. Last week Stickman writes on his website about Chiang Mai Kelly’s “Princess” about to be revealed or whatever. Did you BROS read this lunatics submissions about Princess? Chiang Mai Kelly is a perfect example of what I am talking about here. This “Princess” has pulled every TRICK in the book, done everything a woman can do to control a man, yelled, screamed, pulled knives, EVERYTHING her little brain could contrive, she tried. And why would Chiang Mai Kelly put up with this? YES! The Sexuality Factor!!! Princess must be the hottest whore this side of The Great Wall! She must be able to suck the chrome off a trailer hitch, put her heels behind her ears and swing from the ceiling while singing Hockey Night in Canada, and have the skills of a Shaolin Whore Master to put up with that kind of behavior! Princess must have some serious skills to do this shit to this man, and he keeps coming back and begging for more! I recommend Princess stop being a whore, and instead open a WHORE SCHOOL and teach her skills to new generations of whores all across the land. Her sexuality factor must be off the fucking charts! Can’t wait to see the pictures!

One thing before I go continue sharing my wisdom. Why has not “Princess” whacked off Chiang Mai Kelly’s penis? She has tried everything else? At first I think this is a true mystery but then the fog starts to clear and I know why. Chiang Mai Kelly must be the MALE WHORE equivalent! He must be hung like the proverbs whorse, and know more about pleasuring the female body than that Karma Suing guy, you know, the guy who wrote the book on sex? Chiang Mai Kelly must be a sexual god, maybe the only man on earth who can satisfy the “Princess”, otherwise she would have chopped off his penis long ago eh?

“The Sexuality Factor” will soon be a clinical term used in medical and mental health texts around the world. Soon, you will be able to enter “Sexuality Factor” in to you on-line dictionary and at the bottom of the page you will see “originally coined by Blackest Bart the Extreme Canadian!” You can not avoid the Sexuality Factor in any relationship, even if you are not pussy whipped and even if your “Princess” is not a whore. The Sexuality Factor is simply a fact of life that 99.8% of the men in the world must deal with at some level. Even extremely manly men like Aha Wendigo and myself yours truly Blackest Bart, we can also be influenced by the sexuality factor. Remember Aha Wendigo at the womans party, in his Cabana Boy Beach Pants, penis in the snare drum, eyes glazed over? Having the superb control as a man of his caliber has, it took ten good looking commandos to influence Aha Wendigo. Me personally, I have but half the control of an Aha Wendigo.

BROS, pussy is like nerve gas. Once it enters your nostrils you are powerless to resist. If that pussy is 10-20-30 years your junior (assuming the afterforementioned pussy is at least 18 years old), looks HOT, and you know or suspect she has sexual skills to match, YOU ARE LOST! It’s like an earthquake or other natural disaster, all you can do is accept it’s going to happen and prepare ahead of time. Once you start to feel the first tremors, GET THE HELL OUT OF DODGE! RUN, DO NOT WALK, DO NOT PASS GO AND DO NOT COLLECT $200 (Canadian, our dollars are worth more these days..:), RUN from this controlling whore as fast as you can. Try and preserve at least a modicum of your self-respect and dignity, no woman is worth it! But you will not. You will stay and accept the bad behavior from your Thai whore because of The Sexuality Factor. I dare you to prove me wrong!

BROS BEFORE WHORES! Bros, help each other out when your bros whore is out of line. When your bro cancels ‘bros Muay Thai night out’ because his whore threatened to withhold her pussy if he didn’t stay home and wash dishes, help him see that he should run. When your bro stops hanging out at NEP, cuts back on his drinking, starts worrying about holes in his underoos, and starts talking out loud about becoming a father, help his see that he should run fast. When your bro tells you about the whore who wagged a blade at him, especially at waist level, help him see that he should run fast, as fast as Forrest Gump. Sit him down in a quiet place and explain The Sexuality Factor to him in detail, give examples, read this submission out loud. Help your bro retain his manhood, and I mean that in at least two different ways! The Sexuality Factor has the potential to render the entire male population impotent. BROS BEFORE WHORES!!!


Stickman's thoughts:

While I am all for freedom of speech and allowing people the chance to offer their opinion, I will not be publishing any more from this writer.