I have known this website for more than a year now and it makes me feel…hmm…feel that I should write something with the hope that this might help some of you to understand Thai women better.
A little bit about me…of course, I am a Thai woman, 30, single and well educated (and quite pretty hahaha). Even though, I have lived in Thailand (most of the time in Bangkok) all my life…I could understand English (read, write and speak) well. Regarding to my job, I have many farang co-workers and yes, my boss is a farang as well. Also, my ex-boyfriends were farangs and I will write about them in my next submission.
Well…where should I start? Most of the submissions here are from the foreigners and I could hardly find a submission from a Thai but that doesn’t bother me much except that I always find guys who wrote their submissions on this website repeated the same mistakes the other did before!!! Again and again and again! I would say to myself every time I read the story, “Oh…didn’t they read those submissions before? It didn’t help, eh?” I do not understand!
When I say, “I do not understand” that means –
– I do not know why farang men in Thailand look for a life-time partner in the bars when you know that those girls are after money (aren’t they work for money?) and might have many clients who could be their options and you’re one of them. But…it is possible to find a good one from there too only if you are lucky enough – the chance is 1%.
**Back there in Farangland – would you look for a life-time partner in the bars? If not, why would it be different here?
– I do not understand how could farang men desperately want to live or spend their lives with someone who doesn’t know or couldn’t understand your language even a bit when a communication is very important, essential, in a relationship.
**I know you could say, “body language is fine or a nid-noi Thai language for me will help or she could go to school later” – wake up! This wouldn’t work in long-term – trust me! Women are difficult to understand by nature and it would be harder with a language barrier!
– I do not understand why farang men fall in love with girls who work bars easily and could say you love her only after a day or maybe two hours! and regret later that you’re being used. If “sex” is the only thing you’re looking for in a relationship – then there wouldn’t be a problem eh?
**Love or Lust? Only time will tell – everything takes time. Don’t jump into things. Use your head before your heart = smart! Use your heart before your head = headache!!!
– And…I do not understand how could farang men have the same attitude that “she’s so special – she might be different” when you know – deep in your heart “she’s not, but I could change her!” and you still want it to happen?!
**Prepare for something special then! Prepare to blame yourself not anyone else!
Well…I do not mean to write this submission to make farangs have a bad attitude towards Thai women (more), but I only want to point out that there are many things you can do to avoid being a fool or being used by Thai women, but I don’t really want to use this word, “Thai women” because it sounds like ALL Thai women are bad – there are many good, nice Thai girls out there, but you guys haven’t found them yet because most of the time you look in the wrong places.
First of all I would say – if you are here in Thailand (especially in Bangkok, Pattaya, Phuket) for “sex” only, then it wouldn’t be a problem eh? But what would you do if you “think” you fall in love with one of the bargirls. What I would say is most of the girls who work bars are girls from different parts of the country – but most of the time from “Isaan”. Girls from Isaan who come to work in this “Sex Industry” are poor that’s why they work for money and this is the only job that would make money easier than any other job. I do not agree when someone says “they have no choice – that’s why they have to work bars”. Look at those people who came from the same place but “choose” to do something else, such as street vendors, sellers, maids, security, etc. Why didn’t they choose to work bars even they came from the same place with those bargirls and they are poor? I say this because I want you to know that bargirls choose to work in the bars because it is an easy job and big earning comparing to any other job (for uneducated people) – that means…they are looking for something that would make their lives more comfortable in a fast and easy way. So…if you choose to love them, then you should prepare to be her source of money, a bank or an “ATM” – also, prepare to look after her family and that could not only be her parents, but might include her brothers, sisters, grandparents, relatives, etc. Then…don’t say “I don’t know that I have to look after her family too” after you married them.
“Never” expect or trust that these girls would have only one guy – that is you – at a time. You know already that they work bars so it’s not possible that they wouldn’t chat with any guys in a day except you, or they wouldn’t have any clients come to “pay bar” because it’s not possible – it’s their job. They need money to live so they have to work and you know what work they do. Then…the only thing you can to do avoid being used (most of the time money matter) is DO NOT send them money when you’re in Farangland or help building her house in the village or help saving her sick buffaloes when you’re not married with that girl. Doesn’t matter what they say it would just all end up that they need more money, right?
Some girls have many men because they want money…that’s all what we know, but some are not…they might look for something else or it’s just a habit that they want to have many men they could so they have many options and when it comes to the time, they will choose who they think is the best. Keep in mind – you’re an “option”.
I do not understand when some of you say, “I didn’t have a clue that she’s playing game”. If you look real hard, you would find many hints, signs that say, “This girl’s a big liar”.
If you’re with the girl and…
· she always whisper on the phone even though you couldn’t understand Thai or
· she walks outside to talk when her phone rings or
· she gets text messages every two hours and say to you “someone texts the wrong number” or
· she goes out to 7-eleven and always take her phone with her doesn’t matter how late at night or
· her handbag is the mysterious thing and “prohibited” for you or
· she would just stand there to watch you if it happens that you ever ask to use her pc for a bit, etc.
If you are in Farangland and…
· you call her at night (Thailand time) and she rarely pick up the phone and always have an excuse that she’s sleeping or didn’t hear the phone (applied to those who this happened more than 3 consecutive days) or
· her phone is off for many days and later on she tells you that she went back to the village and there’s not signal (not possible – we have phone signals almost everywhere in Thailand now), etc.
The above are some hints to let you keep in mind or doubt that she might have someone else.
As I’m writing this, I find more things to say, but I can’t just finish this in one go. I have many farang co-workers come to me and always ask me things about Thai girls so they know what’s common and what’s not. Most of the time – it’s always about bargirls!
This submission is to let you guys know more about Thai women from a Thai person’s point of view. I don’t think this would stop you guys falling in love with Thai bargirls, but I would say…there are many good Thai girls (those who do not work bars) out there and willing to have good relationships which I will write again in my next submission how you could find them.
Or I would write about my bad experiences with my farang ex-boyfriends? So you know that not only Thai girls do bad things to farangs, but many farangs do very bad things to Thai girls too!
I wish you all have a pleasant stay in Thailand! Sawasdee ka.
Until next time…
PS. Be careful with everyday you spend.
It is always interesting to hear from Thai women and I liked your checklist of danger signs!