Readers' Submissions

Just Proselytizing

  • Written by Anonymous
  • August 9th, 2007
  • 5 min read


Black Pagoda Patpong Bangkok



Ever see the one or two white guys preaching in front of Nana Plaza, Soi 4, Bangkok?

I can’t understand what they are saying. Part of the problem is that they are speaking too fast, too loud, the music from the bars on both sides is deafening and this kind of programmed rhetoric is often too difficult to comprehend to be effective.

I imagine that they are trying spread the word of God and / or educate the poor sinners entering the premises.

Does it work? I don’t think so. No-one listens. They are in the right spot I suppose, but they are ineffective.

There must be a better way; a way to reach more people.

Two very dear friends of mine were Born Again Christians. They were sent to school by their church and learned to read and write Thai in order to spread the word. One was English, the other from America.

They did not know each other but both did the best they could, going to Phuket Town every day, knocking on doors, handing out the Watch Tower Booklets. Not one person that they spoke to was the least bit interested.

Both of them eventually gave up without converting a single person from being Buddhist to Christian.

Now, Buddhism has no creator or God and gives a central role to the doctrine of karma.

Would you really want to switch to being a Christian where you have a chance of burning in hell? Of course not.

Kevin got a job in a luxury hotel training the staff since he was bilingual and he is doing quite well.

Eddie – Fast Eddie – we called him, who at one time was a cocaine addict, changed his addiction to Christ and then went on to become a bicycle racer when he stopped preaching the gospel.

He was a type A personality who just couldn’t stay still. He finally died of heat exhaustion on his bike one hot summer day.

Don’t worry, this story is not going to turn into some crazy religious tract.

To be effective one must think about reaching a larger audience in whatever endeavor one endorses.

Anyone’s little brother can go on You Tube and reach millions, that is except here in Thailand where it is banned.

I was thinking of forming an organization to save bargirls from their terrible fate. Those poor misguided persons earning more money than the average bank vice-president; making thousands of baht in twenty minutes, giving you short time which the way it’s going will soon be named ‘no time at all’ or ‘not such a great time’.

The internet is the best technique to use to reach a substantial amount of people. First I would incorporate, possibly as a non-profit organization. Then obtain a business license and work permit just to be sure.

Next comes an internet address, a dot com or dot org or whatever.

The name would have to be something catchy like ‘Save the Girls, no booty left behind’. Sorry, that was supposed to be nobody left behind. Speaking of booty or bodies, we would need front people. Beautiful girls in bikinis begging to be saved from a life of sin.

Since there are billions of websites we would need some pre-publicity to get towards the front of the line on the internet.

Would this be worth doing in Thailand? Say a demonstration in front of Soi Cowboy blocking both ends of the street with protesters waving placards demanding education and new job re-assignments for the underprivileged and under-worked demimondaines. (Thanks Mr. Trink) I only say under-worked as they are not trying very hard lately to do a decent job, are they?

Actually most visitors to Nana or Patpong come to visit the girls not to ignore them; that’s why the proselytizers in front of Nana Plaza are doomed to failure.

Of course we would need to collect large amounts of money to be able to send these ladies of the evening (and daytime too) back to their beloved rice farms where they can stand bent over in knee deep water every day and plant rice just as they promised they would to all those generous and good-hearted gentlemen in Europe and America who are sending Lek, Nit and Noi thousands of baht each month to stay at home in the middle of nowhere to wait just for them.

I bet every bar girl would love to do that and this is precisely why we must help them.

And speaking of America, that’s the place to start. Thailand is in the news now with Thaksin constantly in the papers, the stronger baht, weaker economy, the military coup, lack of democracy, violence in the south, gossip about you know who’s only son.

Jeeze it’s about time we had a positive announcement and here it is.

First we will have demonstrations in America where it appears you can protest against anything and what better cause than to improve the lives of those less fortunate than ourselves. For example we got rid of Saddam Hussein to help the poor oppressed citizens of Iraq and look how that turned out.

Anyway to continue, we will notify all the television news stations and hold demonstrations in large cities in America, informing the public that the girls of Thailand need our help.

Huge signs with our website name would be imperative and a passel of scantily clad young ladies would also be a big help.

With a good bit of publicity garnered, thousands would hit on our website and that’s when we would ask for donations for the poor girls forced to work in these dens of iniquity.

Someone would have to collect all this cash and checks sent in for a good cause. I would not trust this charity to the mails.

I would be forced to go personally and hand out the dollars in person to make sure that it got to the girls.

A tough job making all those decisions but someone has to do it.

Inquiries as to where to send the money may be addressed to the hotmail address below.

Stickman's thoughts:

The day someone does something like this will be quite funny. I don't know who will want to have a go at them first, the girls, or the punters!