I met her rather innocently enough amongst the deluge of women who bombarded my inbox moments after signing up for the “Gold” membership on Thailovelinks (TLL). As a matter of fact she would have been lost among the myriad of broken English speaking hotties if it weren’t for the fact she instantly sent me a ton of pictures and went on and on about the natural wonders in Thailand.
There were no questions of “When you come Thailand?” or “What your job?”, just a sincere desire to tell me why she loved Thailand.
I thought, “Wow, someone who could be a genuine friend!” From there we struck up a conversation on MSN and chatted everyday.
I would come to learn this young lady had a proper job designing clothing for a major Asian clothing line and was quite passionate about her work. She was a genuine good girl with an independent spirit. It was not too long until the other run of the mill hotties began to taper off from boredom and I chatted exclusively with her. We talked about everything, from family to our goals in life but never anything about sex. We recognized that we were attracted to each other and would like to meet during my upcoming trip to Bangkok, but never did we cross that line. In a way it made her seem much more genuine to me. I was honestly considering giving up the way of the hound dog and settling down with my true blue “teerak.”
One day we were chatting and I had my webcam open. She informed me her mom wished to get a look at the new suitor and I should “wai” to show my respect to her. Well thanks to this site I actually knew what that meant so I did my best farang impression of a proper “wai” to which I was informed I had passed with flying colors on mom’s approval. Great! Well there was one more hurdle. Apparently papa was not too keen on farang and I was told by my lady friend that impressing him would take some doing, but now that mama digged me I should be good to go.
On the way to Bangkok I was pretty excited to finally meet up with this beauty who I had been talking to for the past few months and when we finally met I was not disappointed at all! She was a very conservative girl. She brought her friend on our first few dates and refused to meet me in my hotel. She told me she did not want to be seen as a whore, and I understood and complied. We went all over the place in Bangkok usually on the cheap and damn near had to force her to not pay for everything. She constantly wanted to pick up the cab, the drinks, the meals, everything! Well I appreciate a girl that pays sometimes, but I know what is a small pittance for me goes a long way for her and I genuinely felt bad when I saw her breaking a 500 baht out.
One day she called me to tell me she wanted me to meet her at a new place, alone. This would be our first alone time. She had arranged through a friend use of one of the classic Bangkok studio apartments for us to have some alone romantic time in. It was here she said to me those four magic words, “Chan rak khun ka.” She also asked me if I would ever consider moving to Bangkok so her and I could be a proper couple. Well as luck would have it I had just found out I was moving to Bangkok soon so the answer was a resounding yes to which she was overjoyed.
All was going quite well for me. I had a smart, gorgeous, and sincere Thai girl who seemed head over heels for me and a future set on us being together. That night we held each other innocently wrestling in bed and did not seal the deal (although the idea did float around out there). I was looking to really show her I was a good guy and it seemed to pay off because the whole next day all she could do was thank me for being such a gentleman.
I was on cloud nine and for the first time in a long time considering love and a long term monogamous relationship. Then I got this odd text message. It basically said, “I am very sorry but my boss needs me to go to Hong Kong for a convention and I will be out of Thailand for about 2 weeks.” Well my first thought was “Lies, lies, lies!” Without proof though how could I really accuse her? So knowing full well she was lying to me I said “Wow baby congratulations! Good luck in Hong Kong, I will miss you but I know it is great for your work.” Then I set about to force myself to believe her because of how good of a person she had been so far. Well I mulled around Bangkok, did the VIP Movie Theater and saw damn near everything that was playing (I highly recommend Koo Rad). I strolled around MBK and marveled at the cell phone section. Then I saw a small internet café. Well I had not checked my email in some time so I figured I am just killing time anyways I might as well check!
Sign into MSN and who is online? It is my teerak!
Me: Sawasdee krab!
Her: Sawasdee ka!
Her: I am in hotel now doing work for customer.
Me: Oh really? I am in MBK just checking email.
Me: I sent you an email, did you reply?
Her: Yes I did, I miss you baby!
Me: Ok be right back reading.
So of course I knew she had not left Bangkok, but here I could get proof…an email. So I looked up the headers and low and behold…yup same originating IP on this latest “Hong Kong” email as every other! Now I was pissed!
Me: So how is HK?
Her: Oh it is so fun! So much shopping!
Me: Why did you lie to me about going to HK?
Her: Why do you think I lie?!
Me: When you send an email it comes with information that gives the originating location of the email…your latest email was sent from Bangkok…so why did you lie?
((about 5 minutes of silence))
Her: Ok I lie you!
Her: I sorry I don’t love you anymore, please go find another girl better then me I am sorry.
She signed out…
So what could I do? I called, but no answer. I sent text messages, but no answer. How does something so perfect just turn on a dime like that? I drowned my sorrows at Nana Plaza like the good farang I guess she thought I was. Before I got back on the plane to head to Farangland I checked my email one last time to find this short little message:
Dear <my name>,
I know you hate me and I am sorry. My father he found out about us and told me I must leave you. Please understand I love you, but I can never be with you. I will never forget you. Please don’t ever try to contact with me again.
You can’t beat papa. What did I learn about this? Family is not just a little more important than you. They dictate everything. Her dad did not like me because I was a white farang and he thought I would never really love his daughter because of that. Well I did love his daughter and was ready to settle with her. I am floored by this turn of events. In my home country (America) if a dad told his daughter to stop dating a guy because he wasn’t white 9 times out of 10 she would tell him where to stick it and be perfectly justified in saying it.
Love for a boyfriend and love for a husband will never and can’t ever be nearly as strong as love for mama and papa for a Thai girl.
I hold no resentment or bad feelings for the girl. She was acting per the culture she was brought up in. I will miss her and I am glad in a way that we kept things innocent, I would not want her to suffer in any way more then she must already have.
• Scandic Sydhavnen Hotel
• Scandic Webers Hotel
• Selandia Hotel
• Square Copenhagen Hotel
Are you sure that her Dad was the reason you split up? She may have said she was going to be away for two weeks but I would suggest that she had another guy in town. You met her online and I have always said that Thai women met through online dating services are just as likely to be juggling girls as their bargirl sister.
Sorry to hear that a woman who sounded so right turned out to be, perhaps, a woman so wrong.