Stickman Readers' Submissions July 18th, 2007

Pattaya June 2007

Some people might know me from a previous submission, in which I talk about my experiences with my now ex Thai girlfriend.

He Clinic Bangkok

I just came back from a 3 week holiday in Thailand. I spend the first few nights in Bangkok and was actually planning on meeting some girls there I had met online, but I decided I could not be bothered, I was staying in Sukhumvit anyways
and these girls would probably not like it a lot, heck they would probably have refused to meet me if I told them I was staying in the same soi where Nana Plaza is located.

After 2 days I had enough of Bangkok and left for Pattaya. Actually I didn’t plan to stay there for the whole 3 weeks but I just kind of got stuck or too lazy to move on once I was there. I have been many times to Thailand, even worked
there for more than a year not very long ago, and travelled around the country quite a few times, so I couldn’t really be bothered Anyways I met some nice people at the place I was staying and went out and about with them most every night
when I was available.

I don’t drink alcohol or hardly do so I normally ask for ice tea, not the sweet stuff that comes in a can but real made without sugar. Most bars however don’t seem to serve tea anymore so I normally got a bottle of water. There
are not a lot of customers at the moment in Pattaya and you notice that when you walk passed the bars round soi 8, 7, 6. and also on walking street etc. The bargirls seem a bit desperate and make more effort trying to get you into their bar. There
were also not too many pretty girls in most beer bars, a bit of a problem for me who only wants very slim girls with good sized boobs and who never had a kid. I only accept that type of girl and if I cannot find one that suits these requirements
I just sleep alone.

CBD bangkok

I have a bit of a problem physically. I’m muscular but not overly so and have six-pack abs. I like to wear non-baggy clothes (stretch shirts or singlets) that show my body to it’s best advantage. The funny thing is that many
bargirls actually seem to prefer out of shape and overweight guys. The one advantage that I have is that I still have all my hair. Well even in low season there is no lack of grossly overweight farang guys in Pattaya. It almost seems that every
white guy has a huge gut, I was really one of the rare exceptions. The reasons why the Thai girls prefer the fat guys can be numerous. Some find fat guys sexy since Thai guys are all very slim so they might be a bit bored with those slim guys
and just see a fat guy as a nice change. However I don’t think that is the reason for most. Maybe they think fat guys are richer?? Being fat in Thailand is often associated with being rich. Girls minds are not very complex. Fat people eat
a lot. And if you can eat a lot that means you have a lot of money. It might also be that they think the fat guys pay more, or will not boom boom them too much cos they are out of shape. Anyway I got the thumbs down from some very sexy girls over
fat guys, not that it worried me, cos I still managed to get enough girls.

I paid 300 baht per night for my basic room. But I still had hot and cold water (I only shower cold anyway) a fan and air con. A fridge etc. I quickly latched up with a couple of people staying in the same place. A 32 year old POM who was
staying there with his Thai wife and a 68 year old POM who stayed in Pattaya for 2 months.

Early one morning of my first week we were sitting downstairs, when the POMs asked me if I cared to join them to Koh Lan that day. They wanted to rent motorbikes and check out the various beaches on the Island. They were leaving in about
1.5 hours to the pier on Walking street. I told them I can’t drive a motorbike, cos I had an accident a couple of years ago and now I’m scared to death on a bike. “well”…the old POM said. “Why don’t
you get on the street and snag a nice bird to take with you to the island, ask her if she can drive a bike, so she can drive for you.

The POMs were both taking a girl, the young one his wife and the older one the girl he found last night.

wonderland clinic

Anyway I had one hour so I got out of my chair and hit the street. I decided to walk around Second Road up to the back of Mikes dept store where there is a market, I needed some fruit anyway. I got there and spotted two very pretty girls
after I had bought my fruit. I went up to them and said hi and asked where they were going. They said they were going home. The prettiest one of the two was very sexy, exactly the body I like. I asked her name and how old she was. She said she
was 21 and her name was Pim. “Do you have baby???” was my second question. Before I always used to be shy to ask such a question but now I can’t be bothered anymore, heck before I wouldn’t even dare to approach such
a sexy girl but after you have been to Thailand a couple of times and stayed there a while even the shyest guy becomes confident with girls. Anyway she told me she didn’t have kids. Perfect for me. Could she drive a motorbike I asked her,
yeah she could (they all can) I then told her I was going to Koh Larn for the day and asked her if she would care to join me if she had time. She spoke to her friend for a while in Thai and then she said ok. But she needed to go to her room first
to change clothes and get some stuff. So we went up to her room in Soi Bokau. I still had an hour. Her room was not very far and she didn’t take long to change, her friend had gone in the meantime. When she came back out she looked absolutely
gorgeous in a shirt that showed her slim and sexy body. I knew I had been lucky to snare this one. She told me she had been working in a bar for a while but didn’t like it so she had stopped working and was now looking for a more normal
job. “Good” I thought, “that means I don’t have to pay a bloody barfine, if we get back”. When I came back to the Hotel I was met with cheers from the 2 POMs who were still sitting downstairs. “You snagged
a fine one there” was the old guys remark. We had a great day on the island. Pim turned out to be very nice company so she stayed with me for another 4 days and nights, good for me cos she didn’t like going to the bars so I didn’t
lose money on drinks. She never asked for money but I gave her 2000 in the end for her time with me. After Pim had gone I felt free and single again.

I cleaned the room (needed to get rid of all those hairs and other evidence of a female presence) went to Tops for a salad, and groceries (would do that nearly every day) went to Tony’s gym on walking street. I eat 5 or 6 times per
day so I spend quite a lot on food. I decided to keep tabs on my foot bill cos I plan to retire in Asia in 2 more years (I’m 40 now) and will have to live on a more limited budget. I eat one Thai meal per day in the evening. Rest of the
day I eat wholemeal bread, 1 or 2 cans of tuna, banana’s, one can of baked beans, 4 yoghurts, a salad with some fish or some chicken in Tops and half a chicken I normally buy on the street for 45 baht. I drink about 3 small cartons of milk
a day and a big water. My food bill would total about 300 to 350 baht a day which is far too much when I retire, cos then I would spend about 10,000 baht on food alone per month.

Pim gone and me being single again it was time to hit the bars again. Met some very nice Germans Michael and Frank (yes they do exist) who were drinking Mai-Tai’s in Soi 8 for only 60 baht. They invited me to drink with them and because
I almost never drink alcohol, I got blind drunk after my 4th Mai-tai. Luckily I was not too drunk to still recognise my type. Anyway Michael, landed a very sexy chick in a bar on soi 7. Frank guy was on a tight budget even though he drank like
there was no tomorrow, and said he could not afford girls. Barfine paid we took the girl with us to look for a bird for me. It didn’t take long, we were walking passed a bar on soi 7 and a very small girl came out of a bar and grabbed me
by the arm, trying to get me in. We went inside the bar and I saw a very pretty young girl sitting there alone. I had a good long look at her, and sure enough she was sexy with nice good sized tits (I would find out later that night) and no fat
on her very slim waist whatsoever. I asked her if she had kids and she said no. “IS she ok for you?” Michael asked. I said yep. Ying was 20 year old and (so she and the bar boss told me) had only arrived in Pattaya 1 week ago. This
was her second night as a bargirl and she had not yet been barfined. Of course I don’t believe this but in this case it just could be true. Ying had something very innocent, and was very shy. She didn’t go out of the bar trying to
get people in and just liked to sit and hide. Anyway I gave her a drink. We didn’t have much of a conversation because her English was limited to almost only yes and no. I really should start leaning Thai. She told me she came from Korat.
Anyway I decided to barfine her and the (now 4)of us left the bar. It amazed me how tall she was. She was wearing high heels and stood 1 inch taller than me. We had a walk around and sat at some other bars, and then decided it was time to go back
home. Michael went home with his girl and I with mine. Frank decided to stay for some more drinks.

Ying was really sweet and I kept her for 4 nights. She not only had a perfect body and a gorgeous face but also a very nice personality. She was really fresh and not yet damaged by the bar life, a rare gem one does not find too easy in Pattaya.
Most of the girls in Pattaya are at least a bit hardened and rough, but she was and looked as if she did not know what type of job she had chosen. I had bought a Thai English dictionary so we could communicate, however basically. She would stay
with me until 4 in the afternoon and then go home to shower and change for the bar. She said she liked my body too, no hair and no fat. She was really disgusted (so she told me) thinking about having to go with fat and old guys. I told her I was
old too, twice her age but she said I looked no older than 30. Most farang guys guess me around 30 but I think she was only sweet talking cos Thai people almost always guess farang guys older than they actually are. We don’t take very good
care of our skin like they do. They use face and skin creams and powders every time they have taken showers (normally 4 times a day) to keep their skin smooth and wrinkle free, they also try to keep out of the sun as much as possible. We like
to sit in the sun and don’t take a lot of care of our skin which makes our skin age quickly. She did everything for me, manicure my toe and finger nails, wash my hair and body. She loved to wash my body. She loved tidy and clean rooms so
she cleaned my room every day. She also took care of my clothes and washed them. During the daytime we went around Pattaya and to Jomtien. She loved the swimming pool there. First she didn’t dare to go down the high slide but after I had
gone with her for the first time she lost her freight and couldn’t get enough of it.

I gave her 500 per day and she seemed very happy with that. On top of that I also paid most of the times for her food and entertainment. But I have to say she also wanted to pay quite a few times. Anyway after 4 days I felt I needed to be
free again, and told her I would not barfine her that night. She seemed genuinely said about that but that is how things go. I’m no good for relationships when I’m on holiday, I need change every couple of days otherwise I grow restless
and bored. Had I been living in Pattaya, I would probably have tried to make a relationship with Ying. Maybe try to get her a normal job, get her into English course etc. I told her that and she said why I could not stay in Pattaya with her. I
told her I needed to get back to work in another 1.5 weeks, and that I could not just keep my family and job behind.

Anyway I was free again to hit the bars with my new friends, and do sports in the daytime. I love jogging on the beach and going to the gym. It is very important for me to keep in shape by eating healthy and practising sports even when I’m
on holiday. When I wasn’t at the beach I jogged on Beach Road. I actually love being on that road, it is great for people watching. You see the weirdest and some of the most colourful farang strolling that road during daytime. It is also
the place where you find some of the most hardened hookers of Pattaya, but also occasionally a very nice and sexy young girl. However I never took girls from there because all of them want short time and I’m only interested in keeping the
girls at least for the whole night.

The next 8 or 9 nights I occasionally took a girl from a bar, but never kept them more than one night because none of them were near as nice as Pim and Ying had been. I met a Canadian guy in my homestay who brought home the most gorgeous
girls every night. He told me he never paid and never took girls from bars. He met the girls in the disco or the shopping malls such as Carrefour and Big C. Many girls called him during daytime for a free shag. I have to admit this guy looked
like a movie star, even though his body was nowhere near as good as mine (but at least he was not fat). He also had a stunningly beautiful and sexy girl coming over from Chiang Mai who stayed with him a couple of nights. Very lucky guy I really
envied him. I did not have a mobile phone with me and this guy showed me his. He must have had over 200 girls in his phone book, many from Pattaya.

I now had only 3 more days in Pattaya and that night I decided to look up Ying again. After I had a couple of Mai-Tai’s with my German friends I went back to her bar. She was there and very glad to meet me. I barfined her and she stayed
with me until I had to leave to the Airport in Bangkok. When it was time to say our goodbyes she gave me her phone number and address and I gave her mine. I had already told her I was not going to send her any money, and that she should look for
a nice and rich farang who can take care of her. I hope she will find one, I might meet her next year if she is still in Pattaya then. I wonder how much she will be changed then. Now she has no tattoos, doesn’t drink any alcohol and never
smokes. Probably when I meet her again she has gained 5 g, has started drinking whiskey and smokes? Who knows. I really hope for her that she stays the was she is but that is not likely to happen, I only wish I could retire now then I probably
would have taken care of her if she had accepted to live with me on my limited budget. The good thing is that she is only child (so she told me) she has no brothers and sisters.

I was actually happy to go back home, couldn’t wait to get back to work again. Pattaya does that to many people, after a certain time the bars and girls lose their attraction, the life in Pattaya is actually pretty boring with every
day and night basically the same activities. year I might again spend my whole 3 weeks in Pattaya.

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