The Little Demon
I'm back from my 3rd trip in Thailand this week and I want to write a bit about the experience I had with one particular girl. Hope it will be a good advice for the not so experienced travellers there.
At the end of my second trip in Thailand last August, I decided to spend my 5 last days in the Sukhumvit area of Bangkok. I wanted to see a girl I met just before my departure the previous year. Went in her bar around 11 PM and impossible to find the girl. Instead of that, got harassed by a lady I really didn't want to spent time with. I left the bar around midnight and it was starting to rain a lot. Was a bit desperate and decided to go to a soi near my hotel. I've passed this soi during the afternoon and been approached very insistently by ladies there: they took my arm and tried to pull me into the bar. I refused at this time, being too shy, but with the 4-5 beers + the time of closure of the bars approaching and the big monsoon rain, I thought it was my last hope to save the night. Arrived at the entrance of the bar I was dragged instantly inside, put on a chair and kissed by a girl. Looked at her only after a few minutes, wow she was so beautiful, young, petite, a lot of charm and sooo lively. A rebel attitude as well, the kind of attitude I crack for.
I was sat in front of the bar and I started talking with the mamasan and with the farang owner when he arrived. Everybody was so nice and so relaxed. My girl was not speaking too much English but she was constantly kissing me, playing with me and made me order a lot of drinks for me, her and occasionally her friends. At one time mamasan told me I could bring her to my hotel and will pay only 400 for a barfine instead of 500… Well I enquired after her age as she was looking very young and ending up in a Thai jail was really not part of my schedule, but she told me 19, no problem. OK. I paid the bill which was very high (1810 baht including the 400 baht barfine). It was my third experience in a beer bar and I never had to pay so much. Moreover, paying a barfine as it was nearly 2 AM didn't seem very normal. But… whatever, I had the money and was not really feeling about starting to argue about this, especially with a so good looking girl that I will just call "D." Back in my hotel, she was colder than in the bar. With all the alcohol we drunk we managed to make love anyway in quite good conditions. In the morning, it was much more harder. Responding to all my solicitations, she ended up saying "ok put a condom"… I could understand that she wasn't enjoying it. Was quite surprised, as my experiences with the 3 other bargirls I had before were much more hot. At the end she ask me money "for the taxi", I gave her the 500 baht I had left. Well, I'm not cheap but I was thinking that I bought her so many drink she was remunerated for in the bar that it was all right. She asked me if I wanted to come again in the bar the day after I said "no, but you can join me after work in the hotel", she first refused and then accepted.
The night after, was waiting for her. 2:00 ; 2:30 ; 3:00 started to think, OK, she wont come and I will never she her again… Started to sleep, then the phone rang. The reception: "Sir, are you waiting for someone?". Me, with some triumph: "yeah she can come, no problem". Him "no sir, you have to come down". Well all right, get down and…. she was here, with one of her bargirl friend. I started to feel very embarrassed. She took me by the arm, she wanted to put her stuff in my room and then we'll go to eat. I was so embarrassed in the front of the receptionist who was staring at us when I gave him the key and left… We went in a street restaurant of Sukhumvit. I had good time with her, 2 of her bargirl friends and a foreigner who was a regular of one of the girl. D. was so drunk, that she felt from her chair at one point. One of the girl told me to bring her home and take care of her. The bedroom action was quite similar to the one of the day before: not too bad with all the alcohol one time during the night, very cold I the morning… I spent The day after (Friday), with her in the bar and paid a nice bill of 2000! We went back again in the same street restaurant with two of her friends (I paid the Bill of course). Back in the hotel Sex was becoming worse. The Saturday was her birthday. I told her I wasn't sure to come in the bar. She said OK kissed me and left. I wasn't feeling spending all the night with her and the friends in discos where I would have to pay for all the bills for their amusement like an idiot. I spent the Saturday night alone, not the courage to look for an other girl for my last night in Bangkok.
Everything should have stopped here but I don't know… was still on her charm, had a complete day to spend in Bangkok before my plane at 1 AM, wanted to say her goodbye and thanks for the good time passed (she was so lively, was giving me so much fun, except in bed)… I suddenly decided to go into her bar during the afternoon, if I saw her outside, I would go if not, well, I wouldn't risk to meet her new customer. She was outside… she looked so happy to see me again.
AT THIS PRECISE MOMENT, THE REAL BUSINESS STARTED.
All the afternoon, she kissed me, she was crying. She said she wanted me to come back in Bangkok, make her a baby and then look after him with her. I found this crazy idea quite romantic. The job was done, I was hooked. mamasan said that she wanted to come with me to pick up my bag I had left into the train station. I Said yes, of course, then she explained me I had to pay the barfine, even for one hour. OK, whatever I could do to spend more time with her. Back in the bar I took her phone number. She accompanied me to the taxi, saying that she will try not to cry again… I was in Love, or something approaching.
Back in Farangland
Called her was the first thing I did back home. "I miss u, I miss u! When you come back Thailand? I want you come back tomorrow!". Wow. I lost all interest in my life in Farangland, was speaking only about Thailand to my friends. I bought a ticket to go in Thailand in January, 4 months after. Couldn't go before, because had no holidays left for the year 2006. Phone calls were very intense, till December when it started to change, she was now insisting that we go in Pattaya, Ko Samui or whatever. After she said that it would be good if I pay the bar 10000 baht as a perpetual barfine. Means, any time I would be in Thailand I could take her without paying a barfine. After she asked me for a phone as a present. The one she wanted was more than 100 ?…Well, I started to feel really less assured about her. In an other way, you read everywhere that in Thailand wealthy people pay for everything to their beloved one who are not as wealthy as they are. So you don't really know if that kind of request is the normality or not. I said yes to everything but decided I will wait to see what will happen when I'll be there.
What saved me is that I was contacted by an old friend who is living now in Singapore. He invited me there. I decided I will spent 3 days and night with my teeruk in BKK and after go for a visit of 4 days to my friend. If the attitude of D. wasn't too suspicious the time we'll be together in Bangkok, I will then take her in holidays for 1 week. I was thinking we could try to build there a real relationship away from Bangkok and her Bar.
Back in Thailand
The three days in BKK were not very nice. I paid the barfine for the three days, but after brief passages in my hotel, she was more interested in going back to chat with her friends in the bar. She bring me in her home, there was photos everywhere of a Swedish guy she has recently met. She said, I had not to be angry, it was just that it was her job to work in a bar and that she has many customers. Well, well, it was a test period for me, so I managed to be the less grumpy I could. The last night, she asked me for money to go to disco with her friends, promising she will come back during the night. She never did. My decision, was taken anyway: I will never take her with me on the coast. It would have been a nightmare. The time I spent with my friend in Singapore was great. Back in BKK I sent her a message saying that I will not come back in Bangkok to pick her up, that it could not work between us… After, I decided to go alone on the coast to Krabi. Krabi was good as well and I managed to meet some nice girls, with an attitude much better than D. Back in Bangkok for the 2 last days… started to want to speak to her, to know what were her real feelings, why all theses "I miss u" when I was in Farangland to act like she did when I was back in Bangkok. I phoned her and said I wanted to meet her for a chat before she goes working. She said, she can't and that I had to meet her in the bar. Oh no! Not that bar again! I was thinking. Went there at 16.00, she was playing like she was angry, but started to kiss me again. Everybody was cheerful, the sisters were telling me that she was so happy I phoned her etc… Barfine time… of course, before going to my hotel, I had to go with her, two of her sisters and their 2 Bangkok first timer customers to a pool bar were the girl played pool and we paid the bills. The girl were starting to speak about going to a club, fortunately, the 2 other guys managed to refuse and the other girls are more shy than D., so they finally all left us alone It was nearly 1 AM and that was not really the early afternoon discussion I wanted to have with her. She wanted to have a last drink in her bar. I went there reluctant. She was drunk, she told me she was tired of Bangkok, wanted to quit her job and go back to live in Isaan. Before she had to make "big money" in one time then she will be able to spend at least a year there, see her old friends and do nothing all day long. I ask her how she would make this money, she didn't want to reply. At one time one sister gave her a photo of the Swedish guy she had printed from and internet shop. She showed me the picture and told me how a lovely guy he was. OK now, I was angry for good. I said, I wanted to live and that she can stay in the bar. No she wanted to come with me (I can understand that, as her room looks miserable to sleep and they are 2 girls to share the same small bed). She managed to come with me and we started to argue in the street. "why are you angry, you don't understand, I work in Bar, I have many customer" I told her that I was nothing for her, that she has a boyfriend, that she should have tell me. Then she start to scream "noooo I have no boyfriend, He's customer like you" then added " why are you angry? He said he will come back Thailand in two months, he said that he will marry me. He's handsome and he has my age!!!" (I'm 30). It was more than I can take. I started to run in the street, leaving her alone and went back to my hotel.
What to conclude of all that?
First, I can only blame myself. I knew from the beginning that trying to have a relationship with this girl will be very difficult. All the other bargirls I met were much nicer persons. The thing is that not only she's cute, but she got a personality that can hook guys like me. Bitchy fun, cute, lively… I think that if it has been great in bed I would have been completely addicted.
Second, there is in this bar some kind of atmosphere comparable to a sect. Everybody tell you what you want to hear. All the time D. wasn't with me, the sisters and the mamasan were coming to me and tell me how she was happy to see me, even one came and told me that D. has said to her other Farangs boyfriends that I was here in Thailand and was the number one. Oh well, I think this atmosphere it's quite good if you don't fell for one of the girl and can afford the dozen of drinks you feel obligated to pay…
About the other guy, well hope for him he will think twice before marrying her. She seems to like him but I think he is the "big money" she was talking about and that what she likes the most is the perspective of a lazy life. That strange, she talked to me about an other young guy who wanted to send her money so she could go back to school. Well regarding her personality, I think some people are out of their head. Maybe lucky for me she met this other guy, if not she might have decided to manipulate me till the end.
I hope his contribution will help some. Between these 2 trips in Thailand, I read Stickman a lot and found it very helpful.
About what happened to me, I'm not sad. As I said I can only blame myself and was mentally prepared to a not "happy ending". With this girl I've been in many situations I found funny now. I've seen, I think, her true face and the last thing I'd like now is a relationship with her.
Yep, it is never easy with a bargirl.