Stickman Readers' Submissions January 9th, 2007

My Really Hot Thai Wife

Inspired by all of the lovely stories of men describing their sweet, deliciously young, innocent Thai partners, I felt compelled to also submit a piece about my own amazing Thai wife.

How can I begin…I first stumbled upon beautiful Thailand in 2001. A co-worker of mine suggested I come to Thailand after I went through a painful divorce where my ex-wife virtually bankrupted me and robbed me of my children. Even though (upon reflection) I only made a half-assed attempt in the divorce courts, my fat, ugly, psychotic farang wife stole everything from me. I was the sole victim in my ten year marriage and lost everything. Nothing was my fault. This depressed me greatly and it took a toll on my health. My closest friends strongly suggested I seek professional help.

But I was a man, 41 years old (at the time), and no, I wasn’t going to see a shrink. Too proud and self-conscious of what others might think of me if I saw a therapist, I turned to the bottle and was soon a borderline alcoholic frequenting the bars around my apartment. Then, one rainy Saturday night, I was at an expensive strip club when I spotted Dan. Dan worked in my company’s mailroom. He often delivered mail to me in my corner office. After several beers, lap dances, and cherries, I told Dan the story of my tragic divorce. Dan, in turn, told me the story of Thailand.

He Clinic Bangkok

Of course I was fascinated with Dan’s vivid and graphic tales of magical places like Soi Cowboy, Eden Club, and Pattaya. To my friends' and co-workers' horror, I soon left everything behind and embarked upon my own journey to Thailand. Now before I go into my stories involving copious amounts of women, I feel obligated to tell you a little about myself (even though you are random people from the internet). I am in my forties with greying hair around the edges of my temples. I am athletically toned from a lifetime of rigorous exercise and training in combat sports. I spent 20 years at reputable McDojo and was approached by several MMA promoters asking if I would fight on their undercards. I am financially successful and was a senior manager at a Fortune 500 company. I first had sex when I was 10. I also have a large penis. <Mate, if we believed everything we read you just described 95% of the site's readershipStick>

When I finally arrived at Don Muang airport, I quickly took a limousine to Nana Hotel. Heaven's got nothing on Thailand. Girls approached me everywhere I went. When I was walking down the street with my lucky Hard Rock T-shirt and cargo pants, university girls in those saucy uniforms shyly asked me if I had a girlfriend. And I was twice their age! When I was eating at a dusty noodle shop, amazing stunners approached me and said I was too handsome to eat alone. I was hooking up with so many beautiful women that I eventually had to use an Excel spreadsheet to keep track of all the girls I met! It was crazy.

Then one day I met Bok. She was a shy Isaan girl working in Central Festival Pattaya at a quiet watch kiosk. We instantly hit it off and several days later we were happily married. Bok is a 22 year old beauty. When I first met her, she spoke no English, but I had been living in Thailand for several months and was already quite fluent in Thai. She came to Pattaya to support her family, but did not want to work at a bar. She is around 5 feet tall with dark, creamy smooth skin. She has a cute little pug nose and exotic almond eyes. Her hair smells like fresh soap and is soft and silky to the touch. Her body is slim and toned and is very “perky.”

CBD bangkok

We have been living together for nearly four years and have two children; a girl 2 years old and a little boy 5 months old. She was brought up with traditional Isaan values and takes care of me well indeed. Not only does Bok apply paste on my toothbrush, but she often likes to brush my teeth for me. Initially this was odd, as I am used to brushing my own teeth, but this service was strangely important to her and the few times when I refused, my lovely Bok would pout and sulk away. Bok also gives me two massages a day. An oil massage right before I step into the shower at night and a Thai massage in the morning. Always a happy ending too wink wink.

My wife is a clever little minx and a wonderful mother. Even though Bok has hardly any education, she picks up on things quickly and has great common sense. She is very protective and caring of our children. Although at first she was quite shy and conservative in bed, I eventually managed to make her more comfortable with her sexuality and nowadays she is the one pushing the action and new positions. I love my wife. She is so beautiful and smart and treats me like a king.

She is the most wonderful women I have ever met.

Needless to say I am happy and at peace in Thailand. It is an amazing country that I wish I knew about sooner. My friends back home just don’t understand Thailand like I do. Even though I’ve lost touch with most of them over the past years, I think if I came back with Bok they would be very jealous and envious of my unreal lifestyle. They just don’t understand that I was the one who got away.

wonderland clinic

Stickman's thoughts:

A humourous piss take. You had me until about the half way point, the real clincher was her brushing your teeth!

nana plaza