Readers' Submissions

Where Is Tom Cruise?

  • Written by Anonymous
  • September 13th, 2006
  • 4 min read


This FR is based on a late-night excursion in January, 2006.
I’ve lived here more then 6 yrs and I’m still single. After retiring from 30 years of government service in the USA I decided to live my golden years in Amazing Thailand. This is my observation from sober eyes and a farang that speaks the language.

Thai women are very clever on the whole. Many wealthy men come here to quickly fall in love just to fail miserably and return to their country poor and broken hearted. In my opinion only – money drives love and relationships. The Thai lady seems to always look for the bigger fish – a man with more money – a man more vulnerable to their sweet talk.

In my eyes I see the ladies at a disadvantage. After living in the Chiang Rai / Chiang Mai area for more then 4 years I learned to live with the Thais. Learned their culture and lifestyle. Thailand is a 50% lady – 50% man country but when you factor in all the men that are gay or wear lady clothes as a katoey then the number of available men is drastically reduced.

The Thai lady wants a man with money but they are few and far between. Usually the men that are straight and married with money have a mia noi or two on the sidelines. The rest of the Thai male majority work in blue collar jobs with a salary of about 150 to 250 baht per day. Hardly rich but if they’re straight they are highly sought after.

Alcohol is a serious problem in the North and at least 50% of his income is spent at a roadside beer bar. Butterflying is everywhere because it’s a constant challenge to find more money. They don’t like farang so much but do like our money. They prefer their own kind a person that was raised like them and went to school like them.

Often the good girls are just too shy to meet a farang (what would my family think?). It’s very hard to meet a good Thai girl but a bar girl is extremely easy to meet. Fights persist inside the family mostly over money. Yes a Thai will rip off another Thai equally as fast as they will a farang.

Responsibility is often lost with the younger Thai girls and boys. Boys do not take responsibility for the children they father and neither do the girls. They drop off their baby for Ma to take care of while they go to Pattaya to swing around a chrome pole and get drunk. Sure they send what money they can to Mom to help with their expenses but where did Mom’s golden years go? Her freedom is taken away by raising kids that belong to her daughter.

I’ve dated lawyers, doctors and professors that often had children but their mothers took care of them. They didn’t want the farang to know about the (hidden kids) because this would lessen their chances to find a man with money. Excess baggage everywhere.

If a long term relationship then comes the baby or either your money will take care of the baby and mother and the rest of her family. In many cases love is only based on how much money you’re willing to throw to take care of many Thais that are actually not your problem.

The sexy young girl has more options then the older woman that now has a slimmer chance of ever finding a man because of her never ending desire to find a man with more money. Old and still poor, she will now take any man that will have her. Gambling, drinking, bad loans or bad business ventures (often with friends) will lead to further poverty.

I lose interest quickly when I bring a lady to my beach home and I hear her say (wow, you live here? you must have a lot of money so I really like you so much.) True definition of jai dee is how much money you’re willing to throw.

Jai dum and kinayow is you’re entirely too tight fisted and not worth the time. I’ve asked several times just how does a Thai lady feels when 30% of the girls in the lady toilet are katoeys?

I’ve also met Thai ladies with as many as 5 husbands mailing in the money all along she would go with me short time because her thirst for money is never ending. After dating hundreds of ladies and many different types of Thai ladies including Pattaya and Bangkok bar girls, I’ve decided best for my freedom and happiness to remain single and live alone. Too many want to take care of you but once they move in and you’re retired it’s you and your money not only taking care of only them but 20 other Thais as well. There’re many ladies just not interested in me because I “know too much”.

If and when I do need help I will just hire a nurse to take care of me – happy living alone in Pattaya, Thailand. It’s a great life if you understand the rules.

Stickman's thoughts:

It is customary that in the poorer, often rural, families in Thailand that the burden of supporting the parents falls on the children. Throw a farang into the mix and hands will come out from all directions.

I maintain that if you do not want to support the oldies, then don't marry a girl from a poor background.