Readers' Submissions

Is It A Dream?

  • Written by Union Hill
  • September 8th, 2006
  • 6 min read


Having just untangled myself from the lovely Geow (who had been doing her damnedest to get me to bar fine her), I found myself standing outside The Tahitian Queen on Beach Road in Pattaya. I wasn’t sure why I had resisted, I don’t usually.

It was a little after 11 PM. I stood there for a moment just gazing into the darkness of the ocean, directly opposite. I ignored the wailings and coo-ings of the free-lancers and katoeys who were prowling up and down the beachfront on the other side of the road. I was having a private moment. What to do now?

Tomorrow would be Friday and I had a 9 AM meeting with a client in Rayong. Worse than that, two of my directors from Australia would be accompanying me. It would probably be better for my career prospects if I was on time and not smelling of beer and sex. But I’m a risk taker by nature.

You would think that any sane Australian would be as pleased as punch to have a couple of nights in Pattaya neatly packaged into a legitimate business trip. And as if that wasn’t enough, with entertainment arranged free of charge by Yours Truly. Jesus, some people would probably pay a handsome price for such an opportunity but no, not these two. I had abandoned them earlier in the evening when after dinner, they announced they were tired and wanted to go to bed. I was caught between admiring their self control and professionalism or labeling them as hopeless wankers. The labeling got the better of the admiration.

The choice for me now, was simple enough. Do I turn right and walk back to the Siam Bay View and put my head down alone or do I turn left and see what was going on in Pattayaland? I could always just turn right around and go back into the TQ and bar fine Geow but despite her obvious attributes she didn’t quite make the grade somehow. So being the arch sleazeball that I am, I followed my instincts and turned left.

Presently I found myself in Classroom 1 which is not a regular stop-off of mine. I noticed there were only four other customers in the place. I plonked myself down and immediately honed in on one of the service girls. She had the standard beaming Thai smile and pretty face but what drew my attention to her specifically, were her pins. She really did have the most fantastic pair of legs. They just went on forever. I couldn’t take my eyes off them.

She brought me a beer and then I offered to buy her a drink. Mainly because I wanted to watch her walk across the bar room a couple more times.

May accepted my drink offer and made herself comfortable next to me on the bench seat. I don’t like to hurry these things but time was getting on and I still had the 9 AM meeting on my mind. If I was going to book a sleeping companion, I had to move this thing on.

May was obviously no newcomer to Pattaya. She knew what she was doing. I let her believe that I was on holiday and didn’t give away any unnecessary information, such as my marital or residential status and I kept the fact that I know some Thai to myself. I wasn’t being deliberately devious but when you live in Thailand, certain things become second nature <You'd make an ace investigatorStick>.

Presently it was bar fine time and May seemed to like the idea. However, she had arranged to meet a girlfriend after work. One of the dancers in Mistys A Gogo just down the road. I suggested she call her friend and I’d bar fine her too, sight unseen and we could all go back to my room together. I sensed a ‘Siamese Waltz’ might be on the cards.

So May tried to call Mon but there was no reply from Mon’s mobile. It was getting too late for me to let this thing rumble on Thai style so I paid May’s bar fine and took charge of the situation. We both headed off to Misty’s to present our proposal to Mon in person. This turned out to be quite a result. Mon was from Buriram and had just come back to work in Pattaya three days ago after a lengthy break back home. Well OK, if that was true I guessed it probably had something to do with husbands and or babies but as I was playing the dumb farang tonight, I kept my mouth shut. Anyway, being a Buriram girl, of course Mon was also very easy on the eye.

So we got the ground rules laid and the three of us headed back to the Siam Bay View. The girls knew that they had to leave in the morning before seven because I was on duty at eight.

When we arrived at the hotel, one of the hotel security guards leapt out of the shadows and blocked our progress. He clicked his heels and saluted and asked for my room number. I was expecting to be asked for the dreaded joiners fee. I gave him my room number, he checked a list he was carrying on a clipboard, located my number, clicked his heels again and waved us into the lift. The girls were suitably impressed. I was baffled.

S-T-R-E-T-C-H……YAWN….

It was a beautiful morning in Pattaya. From where I was lying, out of the window I could see the blue of the sea, the matching blue of the sky and the occasional isolated cloud scudding by. Most beautiful of all however, May was snuggled up to me on my right with those magnificent legs draped over me. My left hand was full of Mon’s right breast. Both babes were sound asleep.

It was 6:20 AM and I could have stayed there for hours but I had real work to do today so I reluctantly woke the two girls, paid up and sent them on their way.

I met my two Australian colleagues for breakfast at the appointed hour. I felt quite sorry for them really though they would never know why.

We made the business meeting and when that was finished I drove them back to Bangkok and dropped them off at the airport.

I had one more piece of business to take of in the city and pretty soon it was early Friday evening and I had that ‘Whooppee It’s the Weekend’ feeling.

Then I remembered, those awfully nice guys at the Big Mango Bar in Nana Plaza were laying on free food and beer on this particular Friday as part of their one year anniversary celebrations. So, I decided to drop by and see what was going on there. This turned out to be a sterling decision as well. Met some local personalities there and the Big Mango guys made a real effort along with their very talented troupe of hostess to make the evening very special indeed.

I however, had had all the specials I was going to have this week and made my way home around midnight.

Thailand, my friends. Are you jealous?

Union Hill

Stickman's thoughts:

Ahhh, so that is why you looked like a spent force that night! Ha!

But seriously, I like these mood pieces like this, with such anecdotes as looking cross the bay while being draped by two lovelies. Great stuff!