Readers' Submissions

How To Find The Right Asian Woman

  • Written by BB
  • July 3rd, 2006
  • 17 min read


Black Pagoda Patpong Bangkok

I am writing this article as a veteran visitor to both the Philippines and Thailand. My advice in this piece is very subjective and I know from a previous submission that I will take a lot of flack for some of the things that I am going to say. But much of the advice that I will give is fairly well thought out. So here it goes…

Rule #1: If you can’t be a frequent visitor to either Thailand or the Philippines, a bar girl will do just fine. But if you can be a frequent visitor, or if you are really looking for a life long mate, then skip the bar scene and find a good girl.

If you have read Stickman’s site on a regular basis you should know by now that it’s incredibly stupid to fall in love with a bar girl. There is no future in that relationship. Bar girls can give you a great GFE for a reasonable price. Be nice to them and enjoy the time you can be with them. But DON’T try to be in a relationship with them.

If you are just going to have fun and want to play with the local bar girls then this is my order of preference:

1) Angeles City, Philippines
2) Makati, Philippines
3) Pattaya, Thailand
4) Bangkok, Thailand

Comparisons of Pay for Play Environments

Angeles: Angeles is about ninety minutes by car north and west of Manila. There are a couple of thousand beautiful Philippinas that are play for pay in this town. Most of them are in some sort of Go-Go Bar. There are plenty of very decent women in Angeles. The inherent advantages of Angeles over a place like Pattaya, Bangkok, or even Manila.
• English is widely spoken. Even though Tagalong is the language of choice, almost all the girls speak English
• Angeles is by far the cheapest place of all the major contenders. Bar fines of $18 to $22 and the tips are straight up $19. Beer is cheep and so are the hotels and eats in Angeles.
• All of the activity is concentrated right around Fields avenue. Walk half a mile in either direction and you will see 80% of what is offered.
• The girls in general are younger in Angeles than they are in the other locations
• Get to the women before they have been their more than 60 days and you may find some very good ones. Get to them in the first week or two and you can definitely find someone that is salvageable.
• The GFE (Girl Friend Experience) is top rate and is certainly better and more frequently experienced than the other places that I have listed.
• You can drop them and forget them and they understand this is a business. Just don’t date another woman from the same bar on the same trip.
• The intense pressure for drinks and money is absent compared with all the other places.
• There is a camaraderie and relaxed atmosphere to the town. You can make friends easily and everyone is very low key

Burgos Street in Makati (near Manila) has some real stunners. Generally the English spoken is excellent. But there are some real disadvantages to Makati. First, it is much more expensive than Angeles. Plus, they are all assassins. They want money, money, money and not your love. The pressure for drinks is excessive in Burgos. Ladies drinks are six bucks a pop. Take out bar fines are 3,000 pesos ($60) but you can get them for half that during happy hour. Tips are 2,000 to 3,000 pesos as well.

But Burgos Street does serve a purpose. For $50 you spend several hours horsing around and have a very nice time, but you will leave alone. For $140 you can have a drink or two and take home a beautiful woman for the evening. For $150 you can rent a bevy of girls and spend time in a VIP room for a good time (in the afternoon).

Don’t expect to find your wife here. These girls are pro’s. Not the sweet things that you will find in Angeles.

Pattaya is probably considered to be the sex capital of Asia. I have a hard time estimating how many women work there in pay for play even though I live close to there. Pattaya is massive. It extends everywhere. I’ll hazard a guess of 150,000 women working in Pattaya. I could be way off, but there is a bunch.

The disadvantages of Pattaya:
• Lot’s of pros. They are there for the money. A very high proportion of the women are pro’s looking more for money than they are for love
• There are severe language issues with a lot of the girls
• A decent, but not obscene, amount of pressure for pushing drinks

The advantages are:
• Wide selection of places to go to with lots of different styles of women.
• Lots of price ranges depending on where you go.
• Beer bars are cheap and so are the take outs
• Plenty of things to do during the day not related to the women
• Nicest place of all the contenders because there is a beach
• Short time bars will cost you about $25 for girl and room.

I would rank Pattaya behind Angeles and Makati if you are looking for a spouse or serious girlfriend. Pattaya might rank ahead of Makati in terms of having fun with bar girls. It is cheaper than Burgos, but more expensive than Angeles. But the language barrier and some of the quirks about Thai women that I will mention below keep it down the list for me.

Bangkok has plenty of pay for play. Nana Plaza and Soi Cowboy being two of the prime places. You find some beautiful women here but drinks are expensive and so is the pressure to purchase ladies drinks in bars. Both Nana and Soi Cowboy are very nice places to go if you want a one night stand. Costs for take out generally run about $15 and a tip of $50 is common.

The disadvantages of Bangkok also include the general level of elevated expenses in hotels, transportation, and food. Veteran visitors can work their way around this to minimize the differences.

A better buy than either Nana or Soi is the Eden Club. Go there and you are guaranteed to have 90 minutes to 2 hours of bliss from two lovely ladies. Cost is $87 and no tip. You can take these girls out at the end of the night for $75 with no tip. Read again: You are guaranteed to have a great time. Not always the case with any other place listed above.

There are some beer bars around Nana Plaza. The prices are cheaper but the quality of the girls is fairly low.

I rate girls as Ferrari’s, BMW’s, and everyone else. A BMW would be the most beautiful woman in America. There are no Ferrari’s in America. There are probably no BMW’s in England now that Victoria Beckham has moved to Spain. You can find the most beautiful women in the world at the Novotel Disco in Siam Square in Bangkok. These girls are more beautiful than almost anyone that you will find anywhere. Most of the women in attendance are either BMW’s or Ferrari’s.

You are not going to find your dream wife at the Novotel Disco, but if you want a beautiful woman for the evening you will get one. The going price for the amateurs there is $100 and you are going to have to purchase some drinks. The quality of the experience can be suspect.

Enough said about the bar girl scene in these four places.


GOOD GIRLS

I find the experiences with good girls in these two countries to be much more rewarding than any experience with a bar girl. The tools that you need for both countries vary only slightly. In Thailand you will need:

1) To read every single Stickman article and contribution
2) To join www.thailovelinks.com
3) To purchase and read Thailand Fever

You can avoid making many of the common mistakes if you read the Stickman submissions and take them to heart. Apply them rigorously to your situation if you get involved in a relationship with a good girl.

If you want to meet and have a relationship with a good girl in Thailand then go on Thailovelinks.com. It is easily the best meeting site on the internet for Thai women. Realize that most of these women are going to lie to you, so cut down on the risks that you are going to be taken.
• Look for a match, not just at the pictures. Do you really have anything in common with a woman under the age of 25? Define what you are looking for. At a minimum you want someone who speaks some decent English (avoid those that say they speak “some”), you want an age range that might interest you, do you want her to have a college education?… a job (do you want to be dating a rice farmer?)… no kids…. Just define your parameters and stick to them.
• Always go on Yahoo, MSN, or some other chat room so that you can see a current version of the lady that you are interested in. Use the web cam and tell them to find an internet café with a web cam. Many women will use their friends’ pictures or put a picture up that is 10 years and 20 kilos ago. Chat with them. Find out if they interest you.
• Call them a few times. Find out if you click and if they have any sense of humor. Most importantly, understand their ability to understand and speak English. There is nothing worse than having to spend time with a woman who has barely passable English.
• Make a list of five to six girls that you might want to meet and then go to Thailand to meet them. Don’t put all of your eggs in one basket. You can always cancel some of the ladies that you are scheduled to meet with if you really find one that you like.

The next thing you need to do is purchase the book called Thailand Fever. You can get in on Amazon.com. It is easy to read and it the best book at describing the cultural differences between Thai women and western men. Half the book is in Thai and is meant for her and half is in English and is meant for you. Bring the book to Thailand with you and make her read the book while you are with her. I’ve lent the book out many times to other people and they have absolutely loved it.

Thailand Fever will help you learn a great deal about how your future girlfriend views a whole host of issues. Women in Thailand view life much differently than a western woman. Don’t assume that she is the only one that is going to have to adapt. There will be once or twice a month that I have a nice row with my Thai girlfriend where we both have to take a hard look at the relationship. Both of us have very well thought out and logical reasoning based on our own cultural background. But it’s completely wrong for the other person’s culture. Thailand Fever will help you to navigate these differences.

In the Philippines you will need nearly the same tools.

1) Read the entire Stickman site. Even though it deals mostly with Thailand, all the same rules apply in the Philippines
2) The website that you will want to use is www.cherryblossoms.com. It is not as good as thailovelinks, but you don’t really have another good choice.


The Philippines is much more spread out than Thailand. You can fly to most places in Thailand on a discounted airline for cheap. The air travel in the Philippines is twice the cost of anything in Thailand. Again, this is an impoverished third world country. You are not going to find as many middle class females to choose from. Impoverished females here are not generally going to be someone you are going to find a lot in common with.

When you go on Cherry Blossoms, set your parameters of what you are looking for much like I indicated you should do for Thailovelinks. But look for women with a job. Jobs are often very hard to find, but those women that have a job tend to have something going for them. Thai women are much more cautious when you meet them over the internet, practically everyone on this Cherry Blossoms will jump into bed with you two seconds after you meet them. Hell, they will travel by boat for two days just to meet you.


Good Girls in Thailand vs. Philippines

The culture shock will surprise you in both Thailand and in the Philippines. In Thailand the culture shock comes more from the Christian/Buddhist differences. In the Philippines it comes much more from the 1st world/3rd world differences. You need to be aware that there are going to be significant differences in backgrounds between you and your honey and you will have to work your way through them.

What I am going to say is somewhat subjective based on my own reading and experiences. They are also generalizations and any one woman can be different from the norm.

Philippinas
• Have strong family ties
• For the most part poverty is everywhere in the Philippines. You are likely to find a woman that has lived in poverty for most of her life
• The education system is in disarray. This is a third world country.
• The very best woman that you can date in any community outside of Manila will often be like dating a Nebraska farm girl when you are from Southern California. I mean, a woman from these rural areas, who is college educated, has a good job, and a good family background will not even be in your stratosphere of compatibility. There is no good answer to this. Just know that outside of Manila, the women here won’t be very sophisticated.
• Philippinas respect their virginity, but in general, good girls will have had at least a few sexual partners prior to you meeting them. They will generally know what to do and they will have enjoyed sex during their life.
• Philippinas fall in love readily, but breaking up is much like it is in western culture.
• I find Philippinas to be much lazier than Thai women
• Philippine woman are generally very sweet and there is almost a national pride in that description.

Thai Women
• Have legendary ties to their family. Their family will generally be much more important to them than you will ever be
• There is a strong middle class in Thailand. Don’t think that it will be like middle class in America, but it is a step up from the poverty of the Philippines.
• The education system in Thailand, although poor, is not third world like. The proportion of college graduates in Thailand is much higher than the Philippines
• Thai women come from a culture where lying is an acceptable behavior. Face is much more important to them. So don’t expect to ever hear the truth. The pecking order for good girls would be like this.
o Love of your money
o Love of what your money can do for any children she might have
o Love of what your money can do for her parents
o You
• Thai woman (good girls) will often only have one or two prior partners before you meet them. However Thai men are quite possibly the worst boyfriends and husbands on the planet. They are selfish lovers, wanting to get themselves off, but not their girlfriend/wives. They are very likely to have multiple girlfriends or prostitutes on the side. They show little respect towards their Thai wives and girlfriends. So when you meet a Thai woman, she is often inexperienced and you have to do a little teaching. It is likely that she will have just laid on the bed while her previous lover did his thing then got off. Many, many Thai women that I have met have never even kissed their husband or boyfriend. I find that Thai women are much more sexually repressed than Philippinas and they enjoy letting go to a much greater degree. They want to explore this new universe of sexuality that opens up to them.

• Thai women come from a very subservient culture. Much more so than Philippine women. It is their role to please you. The mantra of the Thai woman is that she will “take good care of you”.
• Thai women fall in love readily. But they have risked a lot to be seen as your girlfriend, so breaking up can be a huge problem sometimes. The break up can linger for a long time even though you think you have made your position quite clear to her.
• It is a VERY big deal for you to meet her parents. Don’t push it. But if she wants you to, then make darn sure that you are really serious about her.

Though both Thai and Philippine women are both Asian, they are nothing alike. And they are nothing like what you will find back home (both are way better!). If you are a father, emphasize all the positive things that you do with your children. Philippine men are generally not very involved in raising their children while Thai men absolutely forget they even have children. Both Philippine and Thai women will melt if they think you are a good father.


Some Common Mistakes

I personally know over 100 women from websites in the Philippines and Thailand. Most of these women have hooked up with a western man and have convinced themselves that they will be married to that guy in the near future. I know several that have traveled to other countries to be with a western man. Here are the pratfalls that I have seen.

1) A guy goes to the Philippines or Thailand, falls in love, and gets a visa for his honey after just one or two short visits. She gets to her new country filled with ideas of marriage and excitement but after a few weeks of great sex, there isn’t a good connection between the two parties. Solution: Treat this relationship just like one in your own country. Spend the time to get to know her before you import her. Not everyone has the means, but it is the best way.

2) A guy feels bad about the financial circumstances that his honey is in and starts to support her. She loses her support cast at work and has a change of environment. She also has too much time on her hands now. She’s back on the internet chatting with guys just to stay interested and meets someone new. Solution: repeat after me – “my money is mine, and you are poor, and I am just fine with that”. DO NOT send money to a good girl. Nice gifts when you come, sure. A little help so that she can finance her internet café habit – great! Pick up the tab for everything when you are there – fine. A little excess taxi fare – do it. But don’t get hooked into a regular support gig if you are not living with her.

3) Many men don’t set boundaries with their Thai girlfriends. (Generally Philippinas are far less assertive). I see them get walked all over. Just tell them how it’s going to be on certain issues (especially money issues). They will come around to your way of thinking.

4) Think this through – there are a huge number of attractive good girls in both countries. Do you really want a permanent gig with one of them???? A lot of guys get into a

relationship and figure out that they don’t.

5) Remember – IT’S ALWAYS ABOUT THE MONEY!

So where do you go to find a good girl Asian woman? It depends upon you. If you are a simple guy with simple needs, you are going to find the sweet irresistible Philippina who speaks English a pretty good bet. If you want an educated woman who is going to “take good care of you” then go to Thailand. And if you expect to eat her native cooking then you definitely want a Thai woman! You really can’t lose, either country pumps out volumes of the world’s best women. If more western men knew about Philippine and Thai women, then no one would ever marry a western woman.


Stickman's thoughts:

No comments today….unless someone can give me a couple of extra hours!