Take 1: I need a Shower
From 1999-2004 I spent about two years total time in Asia. Mostly the Philippines and a six month stink in Bangkok in 2004. I had made a few earlier trips prior to this time frame to Indonesia, China and Malaysia. I became an experienced monger during this time learning the bargirl ropes in the gogo bars and other girly venues. I have to tell you, I sure had fun in those places. I had taken on a few casual relationships with some GRO’s in these places over the years. I’ve always preferred the older waitress types as they were more experienced in life and generally had good English skills. One thing I always made abundantly clear to these girls was that NO, I would NOT be their personal ATM machine so don’t EVER ask me for money. Never. Most were cool with this; others made a beeline for a softer target. Those that hung on were treated with respect and shown a good time.
In March of 2004 in Bangkok, I met a girl in what was at the time, the Blue Wave club next door to the JW Marriott. I believe the same place is now Bully’s Pub. Checking Bully’s website, I see from the pictures posted, some of the same girls are working in the “new” place. Anyway, back to the girl. I had actually started chronicling my relationship with Nut in Stick's reader submissions back in #9 I think. I bored of telling the story. Nut was neither a bargirl nor a freelancer. She lived in Chiang Mai and had a good job there. The relationship was both fun and rewarding at times, rather tumultuous at others.
Nut started hitting me up for money early on the relationship. I stuck to my guns making it clear that I am not some lovelorn farang desperate for love. This is Thailand and I have options, millions of options. Despite my ATM card being as secure as all the gold in Fort Knox, Nut remained with me. I took this as a good sign that she actually cared for me so I continued the relationship.
I left my position at the company I was working for at the time in BKK in June 2004 to pursue an independent business opportunity back in the US. Nut and I remained in contact via phone calls and e-mails for the last two years. I would have loved to return to Thailand for a visit but leaving a start-up company unattended is not a good business plan.
Nut would usually hit me up for cash each phone call citing some excuse or another. I remained steadfast, no money will be sent.
Well, about a month ago, feeling that this girl has invested two years in me, I will break my no money cardinal rule and send her some money. I sent her 20,000 baht through Moneygram. This was in early May some time.
As soon as I clicked on the “send” button on Moneygram’s website, I felt a sense of disgust with myself. Since my first trip to Asia in 1990 (Indonesia), I swore I would never be one of those saps sending money to some girl on the other side of the world.
Here it is June and I haven’t heard from Nut since sending her the money. Oh well. 20,000 baht is a mere pittance compared to other tales of woe posted on Stick's site.
I need a shower.
Take 2: The Use of the Term Farang
I certainly never felt the term “farang” was derogatory during my time in Bangkok. In my mind, it was the same as being called a “Yank” by my friends from across the ponds. Any benign reference towards someone else can be made derogatory if used in a certain context or voice inflections. Someone could say “He’s an American” and make it sound demeaning. “Farang” is no different as I see it.
Take 3: The Old, Fat, Balding Farang
I don’t understand the vitriol directed towards those older gents walking around hand in hand with a girl 30 years their junior. It’s highly likely the venom spewed towards the gray haired crowd in Thailand comes from the younger set feeling they’ll never get old and gray. How in Gods name can you fault someone in their 60’s for example for wanting to be with a beautiful young silky smooth girl who will treat them like a King? Think about what those same gentlemen’s options are in the West. An old, fat, balding farang woman. It’s a no brainer for these men. Yeah, we all know what the foundation is for most of these relationships but who cares. If they’re both happy and being satisfied, leave them alone. They’re not invading your personal space. Live and let live I always say.
Take 4: Farang Marries a Bargirl
<<shaking head in disbelief>>
To each his own I suppose but we all know such endeavors are akin to playing Russian Roulette with 5 in the cylinder versus one. ‘Nuff said.
Take 5: ThaiLoveLinks
I have to admit, I enjoy plunking down my $25.00 dollars US on occasion for a month of on-line shenanigans on TLL. It’s really kind of silly IMO to join TLL and interact with the lovelies on TLL when one is not actually in Thailand. However, since I’m currently circling the drain (more on that in a moment) so to speak regarding Thailand, goofing around on TLL kind of keeps me “in the game” with the Thai ladies. Do I actually intend on getting involved emotionally with a girl on-line? Right, when pigs fly. I’m sure there are guys from the US, Europe, OZ and NZ who actually travel to Thailand to meet the love of their life met on TLL only to be shocked when actually seeing the girl live. Seems stupid to me. Just skip TLL and head straight to Thailand. I do it because it’s about as close as I can get to being there, at the moment.
Just this morning I received a note from a young lady and she cut right to the chase. “Maybe you can send little money and take care of family.” I love it.
Take 6: Thai Girl Bad
I just don't buy that BS. Yeah sure, guys get fleeced by conniving Thai girls. A vast majority no doubt from girls of limited education and dubious career choices. Since the divorce rate runs about 50% here in the States, men are fleeced on a grand scale in the West as well. Involvement with a woman, any woman from anywhere is a crap shoot. The numbers tell the story. There are honest and lovely women in Thailand. Your odds of finding one drop dramatically if your hunting grounds are the beer and go-go bars.
Take 7: I’m Circling the Drain
It has been two years since I was last in Thailand. The country and its <cough> offerings never leave my thoughts for more than about 60 seconds. I read Stickman’s religiously. I peruse the myriad of real estate sites looking at houses and condos in BKK, Hua Hin, Chiang Mai, Chiang Rai and Pattaya. I read discussion boards and LMAO at some of the stories told. I know that most are probably true. You’d have to experience LOS to believe
it. I ponder damn near 24/7/365 cashing in my chips here in the US and taking the plunge and moving the LOS. I’m 50 now and still look good, I think. Fit, trim and financially secure and all that poppycock. It’s true. So, the huge question
confronts me. Do I pack it in here in the US now and move to Thailand and enjoy the years I have remaining while I still have plenty of lead in my pencil? Or, do I continue to grind away in Farangland until I am 60 or 65 then make the move?
My arms are growing very wary from swimming against the currents circling the drain. I know in my heart I’ll be sucked in sooner rather than later.
You'll hear from Nut again soon, wanting another 20K!