Just A Little Bit Of History Repeating Itself
Do you know the Propellerheads? They had a song a couple of years ago, I just can’t get it out of my head anymore. It is called “History Repeating”.
“.. just little bits of history repeating
.. and I've seen it before
.. and I'll see it again
.. yes I've seen it before
.. just little bits of history repeating”
Well I once wrote an article here called “When you expect more”.
There I was complaining (as usual) about an educated decent girl hiding some quite important facts about her life from me. The funny thing is that she actually read my article about her and she did not completely disagree. Well we are friends now, even after she read it. She is an educated person, as I said. I still like her, I just think she could have done better (I also could have done better, as usual).
Well maybe I am reaching to the stars when I want Thai girls to be a bit more open and honest about themselves. Actually, after that episode, I gave expecting more from Thai girls. Yes, I decided not to try any normal relationships with a Thai, Thai Chinese or Thai whatsoever girls. I said to myself, Statler, now you just gonna have your fun with them, without any deeper commitments. Fine. Yes and here comes the tragic sentence: Until I met Narissa a couple of weeks ago.
Narissa is a law student and speaks fluent English, yeah she passes even as a native speaker since she has no Thai accent, unlike me (I meanwhile speak English with a Thai accent believe it or not), my English goes down the drain here, as you can read.
Anyway, to push the story forward, Narissa and me got closer and closer and everything was fine. The sex was good, we got along as great buddies and I thought, what the heck, I will give it a try. Gottfried Daniel, why not?
Before I get into a serious relationship I would like to know a little bit about the girl’s background, before my senses are drugged with love. Narissa was Thai Chinese, from Isaan. No father around, only her mother and her sister. So far, so so. We talked and talked, and she has a very open minded opinion about this country, criticizing things which are normally taboos among Thais. I was happy and gained a lot of insights into how this country works in her opinion.
I thought, well however her family and friends might be, she listens when I talk (and vice versa too of course, I am certainly not deaf). Normally I am used to people here that I talk to them, but it is like talking to a wall. With her I had the feeling she actually means what she says, about being open and honest and all that. Well of course I was wrong, as usual. Let me start with this. One day she did not show up at a scheduled meeting. I wondered because I cancelled all meetings for her to keep that day for her only. She said that her mother showed up with her nephew and she could not make it. I told her that I was not too happy about, but well what can you do? I told her the next time not to make appointments when she could not keep her promise. I like to keep my word so I expect it from people I take serious as well.
Then I was a little bit electrified by the fact, that she mentioned her mother brining along her nephew. She had a scar on her belly which looked like a caesarian to me. I asked her very softly about it and she claimed it was an appendix surgery. Well
I am no doctor, but it did not look that way to me. Fine. I started to be more alert. The paint came slowly off.
Then she went to Hua Hin for a couple of days with her mother, her sister and her ‘nephew’. She started to write me messages how much she missed me etc. I was confused. Logically, I should not get involved with that girl, because I thought she wanted to sell me her son as her ‘nephew’ but then, I could be over paranoid and she had other kind of surgery, she just could not name it right. Strange I thought, since her English was perfect. But I am not a surgeon. However, I was in the 'Thai fog' again. Fine.
Then the day came when I met her best friend. It was a total disaster. Like her, that best friend of hers spoke perfect English. But unlike Narissa, she was simply rude. I think she tired to imitate a Western girl and I could simply not stand her guts.
The first thing she said to me was that I am in ‘her country’ and why the fxxx I would not speak fluent Thai after being here 2 years. Well, this was in a nightclub and she was shouting it in a very high voice so everybody could
hear. The next thing was that she called all local foreigners whoremongers. It was embarrassing. For me that was it. I mean, hey I am paying for her drinks and she attacks me like a mad dog for no reason? I was behaving like a boy scout, since
I did not want to piss her best friend off. When the two girls were on the toilet me and my male Thai friend (yes I got some of them too) conspired of leaving them and me and him meeting up again later in another place. A couple of days later
I talked to Narissa about her friend's behavior and she agreed. Of course I knew that this girl was her best friend, so I did not make a big fuss about it, just told her how I felt.
Today I got a call from her. She asked me if the next time we meet, we still would have sex. I wondered where this would go and asked her what is the deeper meaning behind her question. She said she was falling in love. I thought, well that is nice, a little bit early, but ok, I could handle it. Including her mad best friend, including the scar on her belly. Whatever. Let’s see how and where it goes. I could always pull the plug, in the beginning at least. Purely rhetorically I asked with who she was falling in love. I meant it as a joke, something like that. “I am falling in love with you, you fool” would have been the answer I expected. Quite lomantic like in the movie theatre. But she answered quite dryly that she was falling in love with a former colleague at work (i.e. her part time job). And now she was not joking. There you have it. I mean, a week ago she kindly asked me to stop dating other women, she wanted to be the only one I was with – and seven days later she tells me she falls in love with another guy who she has probably known for months. How bizarre, how bizarre. Thank god I am a cynical son of a bitch and I did not give up my dates, I just told her I did so. I had a notion about her hiding something behind her back all along* and here it was, right out in the open, just not the thing I expected. Well, I am sure I will have more sex with that girl since I know that little falling in love story is just a small sentimental episode which was true only the moment she told me about it, but my theory about not having a normal relationship with a Thai girl stands more firm than ever. And no, I am not angry. Not at all.
My neurotic paranoia has saved me from getting a heartache. And yes, I will meet her tomorrow again. I am sure she will tell me sooner or later that her nephew is in fact her son. I am in no hurry to know, I am just banging her or we will have nice, interesting
talks. But surely I will not fall for her or any other one. The catch 22 in Thailand is that you only can smell, but you should not eat. You would most probably die of food poisoning.
All my wisdom about Thai girls in two sentences: Just always assume the worst and you are close to the truth. Of course the truth will be worse than what you assumed.
*and NO, I did not go through her phone I have been told that it’s not nice. Besides can you guys read what I said earlier on that subject? Can I quote from a earlier submission:
“…also check her emails if you can. […] Don’t leave any stone unturned. […] So please, don’t think twice if it is okay what you to: All is fair in love (and war) in Thailand.
—> Just remember one thing: If you do it, be prepared that she is doing the same to you. But if she is Thai, it will be most likely in her ‘basic configuration’ to snoop in everything she can put her little nose in. And here I destroy your ecstasy about been given green light to sniff around in your girlfriend’s email, phone etc: Have some dignity and don’t become like them. Interpreting Montaigne in my way: You maybe loose the ‘relationship battle’ with your girlfriend with but you win the fight with yourself by not using the unfair methods. Keep your dignity. You don’t need to snoop around, if you have a bad feeling about her, try to sort it out, if you can’t – let her go. Simple as that.”
I would make a suggestion for you, Mr. Statler. The places where you say you find women, the well-known online spots, are good places to find "good girls" for sex, but perhaps not the best place to find someone for a long term relationship. My challenge to you is to approach some women in other places, away from the online scene, and see how it goes. I think you might be surprised. Meeting Thai women online is almost as easy as meeting them in naughty bars. Nothing good comes so easy….