Readers' Submissions

Thai Therapy

  • Written by Ben
  • March 11th, 2006
  • 8 min read

I wanted to wait after my next trip to LOS but I write a little now.

I made my first trip to LOS last year, only for 3 weeks.

First I must give some details about me. In '98 I had a bad car accident that left me with a few months coma. It took me 2 years to recover, and I still have “light” brain problems and hip problems (this makes my love life difficult). Even though I recovered quite well, I must admit that my life is different, doing very few activities. I married a girl that turned out to be misfit but gave me 2 wonderful children. Without the kids I would be divorced. Don't cry, this is just to be understood.

With this depressing life, I decided last year to visit LOS alone (!).

Of course having read the Stickman site, I knew a little about what I would find, but literature and action are not the same!

Even though I had this basic knowledege, I was surprised by the way a girl jumped on me a few steps from my hotel, a few hours after my arrival. I went in the bar, offered her a lady drink (learning by practicing) but I declined her massage offer because she was not wonderful and I was tired.

My second evening I went to the Japanese restaurant in my hotel (a good one but not luxurious). And then I understood that even at the restaurant I had a girl serving, eating and drinking with me. Once seated, one of the girls came to ask me if I wanted a girl to be with me, of course, I answered yes, because I was thinking she would be this one. She was not gorgeous but really lovely, she had a wonderful and simple smile. So she braught me another girl, funny or crazy but not interesting.

Once the dinner was over P. (the name was written on her uniform) told me that I could take the girl out with me. Was it so obvious I was new in town?!!!

I told her: “You are the one I want to go with”. Something I would have never ever thought or dared to do at home. She hesitated for a while and then accepted to go with me to have a drink. So I paid the barfine (I had read this was compulsory!) and we went out. She took me to a bar, I

don't remember where, but when coming back home she told me: “I don't go back to your room with you”!!

I was a bit (!) disapointed so I went to the bar I was grabbed from the first day and then, this time, I chose the girl. I had a wonderful moment!

Anyway I am an “old fashinoned” lover and, the fact that the girl I wanted refused to go with me made me even more curious about her. She was not like the ones I had read about and I could meet in bars and restaurant.

So almost every day I was going to have dinner with her, and I enjoyed it, she was really very good company. That way, I got to know her much more after dinners of talk, and, also learning about Thailand, she took me to some wat = monastery…. whe she had her day off, and I learned about Buddhism that I was interested in. Her English was fair, mine isn't perfect but we could talk about everything. I really enjoyed going with her.

As she was working in the restaurant of my hotel, she knew very well that after having dinner with her, I was going out and coming back with bargirls (because of her refusal!). Back to my hotel, I had to walk in front of the restaurant, no way to hide my bad farang behaviour from her spying eyes!

She really could have made a lot of money with me, more than the restaurant tip. She even laughed at me once “You spend a lot of money with bar-girls “!

Every day I was asking her to go out with me, and she had been waiting a few days to take me to Nana, Cowboy, karaoke or katoeys show at the theatre close to the hotel but once again she never wanted to come back with me and was choosing the girl to barfine!!!! This was really getting on my nerve because SHE was the one I wanted.

One day, having dinner together, she took my hand, showed me my wedding ring and told me “This is what I'm looking for, a serious man to be married!”

A few days later, I had bought a nice (but not expensive for me) ring that I offered her. She was happy and I thought she could not refuse another time to come in my bedroom. She did, but not for full intercourse. Once again I did not get what I wanted!

Till now everybody will think I'm stubborn or stupid, but I went with some bargirls and I did not enjoy it with them because of my physical problems. Even though I have no problems walking, it becomes difficult to have satisfactory intercourse, I need someone that understands that I am not a gymnast. The worst is, even before my accident, I needed to know the girl before having a “serious” relationship. That's why bargirls were good from a physical point of view, but left me disappointed after a while. A few times I even felt disgusted (by myself), I had one from Nana, she was doing this like a machine. My P. once took me to Cowboy where she knew a bar, so we had a drink with the mamasan she knew. The mamasan ”gave” me a brand new girl from the countryside, she was really cute and new in town but spoke almost no English. Even though we didn't speak a lot, she was a young and lovely girl and I was feeling sad she had to do this for a living. This was not what I was looking for.

I am a sentimental lover!

I must admit that I was falling in love, and everybody in the restaurant was laughing at me, as soon as I came in, one girl was running to bring P. to my table.

She lived not far from my hotel, and one evening she took me to her appartment. I was very happy, she was beginning to trust me! When I travel, I like to be with the people of the country, you learn a lot by just visiting a house with local people, their everyday life. This was really a very simple and small appartment. I noticed a photo, this was her former Dutch boyfriend. She seemed to have been in love with him but he cheated too much on her. She threw the photo in the garbage. It seemed to be a recent affair but I didn't ask a lot about. And once again she told me I could sleep there, but on the sofa! And I am stupid because I went back to my hotel. I should have tried the sofa!

Once we went to meet her sister to have dinner, she was nice too with a German boyfriend who was very nice and respectful.

So after 3 weeks, everyday was “same,same”. But even though I did not have her in my bed, I enjoyed being with her. And then came the day to leave LOS, I had my last dinner with her and I told her to come with me to the airport.

The restaurant mamasan charged me a bigger last barfine!

So I left her, I know this is not the way in LOS but I hold her in my arms for a big kiss, this made her surprised and she smiled like I loved.

I called her a few times from home and we keep in touch by email.

After 6 months, she was surprised that I did not forget her and she even thanked me for this. She knows I am married, I'm not very rich but have enough to live on.

Almost one year later, she seems happy (!?) to meet me again and wants to take me to Ko Samet.

Anyway I don't know what I will find. This time, I hope to have some weeks only with her but I am still wondering if it will happen.

Otherwise I will sadly (!) visit Nana, Cowboy or Soi 33 again!!!

As she wrote me, I still have many things to learn about Thailand..!! (On which subject?). Some times, I don't understand if she speaks seriously or humourously.

English is not either of our native languages. And above the language barrier, we have a different way of thinking. (Christian / Buddhist). I don't know what to think when she told me my next baby would be with her. Anyway I am not against it (even the opposite), I just need to settle my situation at home first.

What I am worried about is that, I am truly in love with her and she knows it. The good point is, that I am “wise” enough not to act like a kid and I keep cool. And I read a lot of “Mine is different“ stories!!!!

I am not too old (38) but I am very happy that I met her. She gave me the vey good anti-depressive shot I needed after my accident

This time I am confident…….. And who knows one's future?

I am so eager to fly by the end of March.


Stickman's thoughts:

Good luck….