Stickman Readers' Submissions March 18th, 2006

Normal Girls / Bargirls, What’s The Difference?

Something personal first: Okay Hippo, another one of my semi-literate emails to Stick filled with bad grammar and half-baked thoughts, which you obviously enjoy so much reading that you even dedicate your time analyzing them. Thank you for your suggestions by the way, you are right in many points. But just do me one favor, Hippo, write your next submission in a foreign language, (preferably pick French, Spanish or German, the languages I understand besides English) and let me have a laugh too.

Disclaimer: This article may give you the impression that I see all Thai girls just as exchangeable merchandise. In general, I don't see them that way, if they don't give me the impression that they see me as exchangeable merchandise.

He Clinic Bangkok

Here we go: The title of this submission is mean. I know. Am I out of line? My answer is no! Read why.

I had an American neighbor. His name was Mark. He was an ex-football coach in his late 50ies. He was not ugly. He was still looking good and he was quite impressive with his wide chest. Not just that, he read philosophy books. So I liked him. I like all Americans who can talk about Emerson and Thoreau with me. Anyway, he had one flaw: He only went out with bargirls, i.e. he brought them to his hi-so apartment. I thought that was not nice. We talked about it. He just said, well he tried the normal girls, but that he found no difference. He even said bargirls are easier to control and would cost him less money and nerves. Of course I looked kind of down on him. Poor dirty old man I thought. It was in my first year in Bangkok. But today, in my third year in Bangkok I understand him.

Well I think, from a pragmatic point of view and from a financial point of view, romance aside: The prostitutes or so called bargirls win over the normal girl. By far I would say. Why is that?

CBD bangkok

1. Check how long it takes to get a normal girl into your bed. The time you waste on the chat and on the internet. Per girl you get I would say 5 hours? This includes the time you waste to set up all the internet traps and to chat with some girls who refuse to meet you, or just look not interesting enough to meet. Something like that. You think I am crazy,
when I say it takes 5 hours? <The chase is AT LEAST half the fun – Stick> Are you sure? I know you can pick up a more or less sexy looking girl on the Internet in 5 minutes, but this is certainly not the general rule and if you are honest to yourself, you know how many desperate hours you sit in front of your screen and nothing exciting happens. Count all the hours since you have arrived in Bangkok (and maybe before that) together and divide them with the number of girls you not just met, but had sex with. So: Now how much is your normal income for 5 hours work? Let’s be modest and say its a thousand baht per hour (you think that is too much? A thousand baht? Is it really? Ask yourself how much your time is worth.) and that would be already 5,000 baht then. Even if you take half it’s still more than a one night stand with a hooker, which is 1,500 baht? 2,000? Less, more? I guess it's around there.

2. The money you have to spend to impress her. Come on, we know that in Thailand your good looks don’t get you laid if you live in a shack and wear shorts. Let’s say it takes two dinners to get her into your bed, well you don’t take her to McDonalds, let’s say the whole show, two dinners cost you mmh 1,500 baht? Plus the gold class seats in the cinema? 1,000 baht? Plus your nice clothes, your nice apartment, bla bla bla. I will not even take that into account. But it is there. So…

How much have we spent on that great normal girl so far? Roughly 7,500 baht. Maybe half, depends on your budget and the way you look at it. I am just making this up. For me, I don’t like chatting. I don’t like the internet dating websites. But what is the alternative? Pick a girl up in a disco? Where? Q Bar? Well, I would say, there could be some hidden costs in that adventure. Same with some of the domestic internet girl as well, maybe a bit less, I thought that you can examine her beforehand a bit better. The disco girl is a wild creature. You have no clue what you get into your bed. But a bargirl comes, does the job and bye bye. This sounds cruel, but who wants to sleep twice with the same girl? Mom, okay. I usually slept with these 'normal' internet girls only twice. Why? Because most of them bore me to death with their 'I never done that' nonsense after I had them. Along with the see through lies comes the shallow Kentucky Fried Chicken sex. If this makes me a bad person, so be it. On the other hand if they would be just a little bit more honest with me I would respect them and surely not treat them this way. All is a question of what comes around goes around. Anyway that would be 3,750 baht per time. That is quite something. I could have gone straight to Poseidon and get a Superstar there. Or to the Eden club and get a threesome.

Sometimes I really have the feeling, that we just get the leftovers of girls in Thailand. The ones nobody else wants. Seriously. Most of the girls who are after the Westerners would not be considered attractive from a Thai guy perspective. Well, Thai girls are not so intelligent, but they are all street smart. So if one has darker skin and no suitable Thai guy wants to date her, she just tries her luck with an equally rich foreign guy. Maybe she would prefer the Thai guy, but she knows she can’t get him so the foreigner is a great alternative. But of course she is not just dealing with one guy at the time, until she gets married (and maybe beyond?), she has a whole shopping list of guys in her phone. <This is VERY true – Stick>

wonderland clinic

I have a bad, bad habit: When the chick is in the shower, I go through her phone. I do this since they will never tell the truth about themselves anyway. They would all say they are virgins or close to it. So, the average girl I met has a busload of guys in her phone. That means, you share her with other guys. Maybe five at the time? I went through normal girls’ phones with literally hundreds of foreign names. Bargirls have also a busload of guys’ names in their phone. So, no difference in that. Is there a difference in the education? Yes, there is. On the paper. In reality I am not so sure.

But there is a difference when you walk down the street with a bargirl and a normal girl. When you walk down the street with a bargirl, nobody gives a shit, because that is what they see every day.

When you walk down the street with a normal girl, let’s say she is even a bit white and has an office uniform on, sweet Jesus, look at the people’s faces! They think what a big slut she is! A normal girl going with a Farang, that is the worst! You see the people’s eyes jumping from staring at her and staring at you back to staring at her. So whatever you do in Thailand, you can’t win. The more you try to please the locals, the more you catch their suspicion. Better just go with a bargirl, meanwhile they are used to that. If you think that you get some extra points from them for going out with a girl they consider polite you could be wrong. Of course the waiters and everybody else you meet that day, all pretend to be nice to you, but when you leave they will just gossip how much you have to pay that polite girl to be with you. In their eyes, you are corrupting her. Because which polite girl would go for free with a Farang freak like you anyway? Thais always see it the way they want to see it. Am I too negative? Far from that.

A friend of mine was invited to a Thai TV talk show as guest in the audience. Well, he is an actor and he was paid to do that (of course nobody told him in advance what it was about, if he had known he would not have gone there). The topic was why the Farang likes Thai girls so much. Of course, it was the common opinion that Thai girls were the best girls in the world. That is no surprise, but they argued even further. They said, what desperate creatures these Farang must be to come all the way around half the globe to steal a girl from Thailand. And now: A Thai man would never do that. He never would go to France to get a French girl. At this moment, when I heard the story from my friend I laughed. Well, maybe French girls would not be so interested in Thai men I said; but this is not the point. We need to learn to see the world from their perspective! And since there is no rationality here, their world is totally different. Their world is built in the way that they do not lose face. That is why they keep looking over the prostitution thing. And the pollution, and the poverty and everything else. Because if they admitted that these problems are there, their dream castle Thailand is the best country in the world would fall down instantly. So, they don’t want to risk that. Better to come up with some creative cover stories.

I never met many bar girls. But I think if you are nice to them, they will be nice to you too. Of course they expect money from you, but then, you are maybe cheaper off with them if you are just interested in the sex. To this day, I am undecided if it is possible to have a real relationship with someone from this country. Some guys are lucky, but the big majority is not. And I would say, not everybody is an idiot and a loser who comes here. So maybe the cultural difference is too big. Maybe we finally need to accept that. Of course some romantic Shakespearian would still believe in the real love issue here and maybe we should just let him try his best.

For me, I think Thai girls are sexy. Cute, maybe. But not interesting, and far from intelligent. I kind of know how they react, and it’s like I am with the same woman all the time. The shape is different, but the mind is an original Thai clone. The bargirl wears jeans and a spaghetti top, the normal girl wears a skirt and a blouse. That is the difference between a bar girl and a normal girl. The normal girl says she is busy shopping with her mum if you want her to meet you, the bargirl says she has already a customer. And ah yeah, the bar girl is cheaper, maybe

P.S. If you don’t agree with me, then you are welcome to keep on the super intelligent chatting. I think 1,000 baht per hour is a shit salary to entertain these kids. This is a serious question: Why not just skip the nonsense and pay
straight up? If we, the so called Farang, do not get accepted in Thailand anyway, no matter how hard we try, why don’t we just live up to our reputation like the single male sex tourists do? If we behave differently, we create just suspicion
and all the good we intend to do is in vain. So, let's maybe better just give them what they expect from us. They don't seem to mind. This is the only win-win: They feel superior, and we have the fun.

Stickman's thoughts:

For me, a brilliant read, and perilously close to getting a green star. I just LOVED this quote – “it’s like I am with the same woman all the time”.

I will disagree on one thing though. For me, pursuing women is most of the fun and the sex part is really little more than the icing on the cake.

nana plaza