Readers' Submissions

The Transformation

  • Written by Danny
  • December 23rd, 2005
  • 6 min read


By Silome



Having enjoyed and benefited from Stickman’s site since 1999, I thought I would contribute some. I am a 45 year old man of South Asian descent, settled in the USA for many years. I came to the US as a student, got a job, then a Green card, then a coveted job in the IT sector and did well till 2000. Then with the tech meltdown, I lost my job and it has never been the same since. Guess where my job went? To my country of birth! For 2 years I took employment with a company over there. If you can’t beat them, join them, right? Didn’t work out. My supervisor was 15 years younger and less experienced, set aggressive schedules (meaning, work late nights and weekends, for free) and told me what to do despite not knowing how to do it himself. With a red hot job market, one can get away with bullshit, as he did. He also got promoted. I returned to the US. Too little money for too much work. It’s a white collar sweatshop over there. Or maybe I am spoiled, working in the US!

That was one aspect of this story, the other one relates to my experiences in Thailand and Philippines, and how these poor, some educated, some not, but mostly nice young women of both those countries brought happiness back into my life and nice memories to reminisce about.

I had an arranged marriage, found out she was looking for a sperm donor, not a husband or lover. Fortunately, I realized this soon enough and stopped at one child. When I was young and single, I swore I would never pay to have sex, and also looked down upon men who did. And when I knew about older men having affairs or going to prostitutes, it was blasphemy! But that was when I was in my late teens and twenties. What did I know at that time how my life would turn out?? First it started with going to strip clubs. No touching allowed, just an air dance (technically known as a lap dance) for 20 dollars. The dancers told me that they could touch me, but not the other way around. And 20 dollars for that!!! And a $4 beer plus a 1 dollar tip for the waitress. After a while (more like a few years) I took some liberty and started touching them, some didn’t mind, others got angry, stopped dancing, took the money and left. But here’s what happened that resulted in my never visiting a US strip club ever since.

In 1999, a chance meeting with an office colleague (who is now a good friend), changed everything. He had been to Thailand a few times and found out I was interested in the ‘strip club’ and ‘bar’ scene. Another friend had also mentioned in passing about the scene in Bangkok, but I never paid attention. Suddenly, I was interested. Within days of meeting him, I decided to take my first trip to Thailand in 2000. There was so much anticipation, excitement, I felt like a teenager waiting to go on a first date. I thoroughly studied ‘Stickman’s Guide to Naughty Nightlife in Thailand’ before the trip. And Thailand delivered. Big time. I was hooked, addicted perhaps. It took me a month to get over the experience, was distracted at work, thinking all the time about the girls and the time I spent with them. And then the planning started.

I visited Thailand 2 more times since then and discovered Philippines after that and visited there twice. At an age where I thought the company of a young woman was impossible, I cannot believe I can have a hot time with 19 year olds with a nice attitude. I realize it is p4p, but it definitely does not feel that way when they are with you. I don’t know how they do it, but making the ‘customer’ happy comes very naturally to them. Needless to say, I treat them very nicely. I don’t pay them a large amount, but more than make it up by the way I interact with them – with respect. Most of them do not think of themselves as prostitutes, such are the ones with whom I have had very good experiences. On all my trips, there were only excellent and good experiences, never an unpleasant one. I also tend to select average or sometimes below average looking women, they give me the best time. The few good looking ones I selected were disappointing, given my expectations, but never unpleasant.

I look at bargirls in a different way now. I look at them as human beings, people who have likes, dislikes, desires, sometimes ambitions too. And it is interesting how many will pour out their life stories when they find someone that is willing to listen. (So far I have never heard of the sick buffalo, handicapped mother, etc. from any of them.) Treat them well and there is a potential of a GFE, age no bar. It usually takes me about a month to stop thinking about the most recent trip I made, and I am always planning the next one (addicted, didn’t I say?). But I keep myself limited to not more than one trip a year (although I feel like going thrice!!). It is a male’s Disneyland, as many readers have said, and more so for those who are on the wrong side of 40 or 50. With globalization and jobs moving offshore, money is tight (no more well paying job for me like before) and I have to think about retirement too. But I live quite frugally, driving a very fuel efficient car and sharing an apartment with roommates. That way I first save up the money for trips to LOS or PI before going out and spending it. I don’t try dating, and other than being bald, I am physically okay, but cannot attract an average looking woman in her thirties or early forties without considerable effort. It’s not worth it. All I see available are fat women eating Big Macs and fries at McDonalds, and then drinking Diet Coke to cut down on calories.

I have been reading submissions on this site, and know the pitfalls and cautionary notes mentioned therein. As a result of those warnings, I have never fallen in love with any of the bargirls (I may have if I didn’t have that knowledge) and am confident I never will. I am not interested in marriage or a trophy wife. But being able to spend time with a 20 year old girl (mostly different each night) who returns the ‘affection’ illusion that feels so real, is something that puts such a big grin on my face. Friends and colleagues wonder what is wrong with me. Only I know – The Before and After Effects of a trip to LOS.


Stickman's thoughts:

Guys like you who come to Thailand once a year and see it for what it is are the ones who are must in control, addiction or not.