Outside The Farang Areas
By Indo George
The funniest thing about naughty nightlife outside of farang areas is the quality of girls available in the small town Thai only brothels. We really are getting a rough deal on our own patch and not only financially. By and large the girls are prettier, often without kids, more caring and feminine and they won’t try and drink you under the table for their cut of the drinks bill.
I met a stunning 21 year old student in Nakhon Nayok. I was traveling to deepest Isaan on business and the weather turned so I head into town and checked in at my friend’s house there and he took me into town later that evening. Not a lot going on there so he suggested a trip into a “Karaoke” bar. There was the usual Thai thing with older guys there with a bottle of Johnny Black with their name written on the label and a sweet damsel topping up ice and soda on every sip. There were a dozen or so girls in the joint all of which were very pretty and could have made more than a few baht working Angels one or two nights a week…anyway I had a few drinks and declined the persistent requests for me to bang out a song but before I knew it I was getting merrier and more relaxed in this very friendly gaff. After I belted out Limp Bizkits version of a Who song I suddenly had an admiring audience of 2 Thai guys and their harem and they gestured me to their table.
One of the girls with them was this 21 year old student who I will call Lek. The Johnny boys both spoke reasonable English and we had a very good talk about things in general, one of which was their reason for being out of their native Bang Na and up there in NN. They both agreed that the quality of girls in Bangkok had dropped dramatically and the girls there had serious attitude problems (their words not mine!!). They regularly visit NN and other satellite towns in search of these little Thai treasures and NN was a particular favorite of theirs.
Lek began chatting to them and to my surprise she started talking to me in perfect un-accented English. It turns out that her dad before leaving the family to set up with a woman in Bangkok had been a prominent businessman in NN and she had benefited from regular education holidays to the UK and Europe during her teens and had stayed in the UK most summers. I’m not kidding, if I had closed my eyes and listened to her talk she could have been mistaken for a girl from the home counties. Obviously I asked her what brought her here and she said she has come here many times before on Friday nights to break the monotony of her boring job in the local bank. She had a farang boyfriend who she met in MBK and he’d pissed her around a bit and she had moved away from a half decent job in BKK to get away from his reluctance to leave her alone.
Well the night was drawing in and I expected the Thais to pull a girl and sneak off to a local guest house or something for the night and sure enough they each left arm in arm with their chosen Tilac (isn’t spell check great ?….just came up with a suggestion for Tilac as “Tit Lark”!!! …..fabulous similarity of meaning??) Anyway, I was left with Lek and she suggested that we carry on our chat outside over a can of beer and a few sticks of BBQ. The chat was much the same same gibberish but with a bit more convincing innocence than I am used to with Nana, Cowboy, and Bangla Road etc girls and she was any way simply stunning to look at so I put up with it and popped the question of how much for the night. She was shocked and a bit pissed off with my suggestion that I had expected her to be a BG on the make, but after a bit of consoling she agreed that if she stayed with me the night then a 1,000 baht would make up for her having to explain to her mum where she had stayed out all night and her needing to get 2 taxis in the morning to get home and then get to work at the bank…so there it was, deal done. All night with an amazing babe for 1,000 Baht…..I mean she was Nana "Jap Only" bar quality…magnificent all over.
I had a superb night, she called a sicky with the bank next morning, told her mum she was staying at friends and came with me to Middle Earth….sorry Middle Isaan for my business trip. I’ve still got her mobile number and she regularly joins me on “business trips” around the area.
I have visited quite a few rural Karaoke joints and had many an acquaintance and never once been ripped off and never had a disappointing night of fun and had many a phone number of girls quite willing to join me anywhere at short notice. What a difference to bagging your average Nana girl who sees every hour of every day with you as part of her salary / hourly rate and of course no bar fines or girl out charges to stump up for.
One piece of advice, it does pay if you can string together a sentence or two of the lingo before you go out exploring and go with somebody in the know of the locality you are visiting.
The countryside is about to be invaded and rural karaoke joints will never be the same!