Stickman Readers' Submissions October 3rd, 2005

Thai And Taiwanese Hell

Living in a small town in Kentucky has its advantages. It's pretty nice to go to the bank to cash your pay check and they don't ask for your I. D. and they call you by name. It's pretty nice to go pay your utility bill and they don't
even ask your name because they know you. Actually, every where I go, people know my name and this has more advantages than I can write about. To sum it up, if people know you and trust you, they will do favours for you and it's a two way
street. It has nothing to do with politics, it has
everything to do with knowledge of each other and trust, pretty simple don't you think?

But then again, being a 45 year old single male in a small Kentucky town has its disadvantages, the foremost being the lack of available American females in my age range. In my submission "Farang woman", I wrote about my life's experiences
with American women, now it's simply a lack of available women in my age range which has led me to pursue the female immigrant and Asian student population here, which
led me to the following very confusing experience.

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I was chatting with one of my associates at the store where I work about the numbers of Asian females at the University here (he is also a teacher’s assistant at the university) and he told me about this Taiwanese girl named Mai (not her real name)
who was in his class. He described her as a very sweet girl, very outgoing and very easy to talk to. He said she stood only 4'10"and very tiny and petite, but according to him she was was very special. But then again, he is Hispanic.
What do Hispanics know about Asian girls? Actually, he was trying to help me to meet a nice girl and I don't blame him for what happened, we are still friends to this day and I love him as if he were my brother. Our blood is still red, no
matter what race we are, the blood is red.

Well, the next day my associate and I were chatting about Mai and then she walked in. He pointed her out to me but he didn't introduce her to me. Then the next day, he and I are chatting about her and again and she just happens to walk in, this time
with a Taiwanese guy. My associate told me that I should talk to her, however I was a bit reluctant to do so since she was with this Taiwanese guy, but I thought what he hell, I have nothing to lose. I decided to talk to her. I got her e-mail
address and we chatted via e-mail a couple of times, but then she had to go back to Taiwan for about a month. When she got back, we continued the e-mails and chat on MSN. This led to phone conversation and after our second phone conversation,
she invited herself to my house, but I just wasn't up to it. I had worked late that night and I had to be in early the next morning for work.

We chat on the phone the next day and she asks me out on a date. I am a bit confused my this since I am 45 and she is just 20 and surely she has a lot of younger and better looking guys on campus to choose from, but me being male and the male hormones
taking charge over logical thinking, I go for it!

I then pick her up at her apartment. I took her to a very nice restaurant for dinner. We chat and everything is going very good at this point. I am actually enjoying her company so much that I thought that I was in heaven! Across the table from me is
this very cute, sweet Taiwanese hottie smiling from ear to ear and she is actually enjoying me being nice to her and I just as much am enjoying being nice to her. At this point, things are going very well between Mai and I, but that will soon

We chat some more, and after we finished our meal, I asked her what she wanted to do after dinner and she said that she wanted to go to a movie. When we were leaving the restaurant, we ran into a friend of mine and his wife and children. I introduced
Mai to them. Mai then walks over to them and starts playing with their little boy, holding him in her arms as if he was her own child. While watching Mai handle this child, I thought that I had finally met the girl of my dreams. My friend also
felt the same way. He said that I
would be very lucky to ever meet a girl with a personality like hers.

At this point, it is very loud in the restaurant and I really needed to go to the restroom. I tried to tell Mai, but she couldn't hear me because it was so loud in there, so I tapped her on her shoulder to get her attention (which I found out later
is a very big no no in Taiwanese culture). Maybe this is where things went wrong.

We had about 45 minutes before the movie, so I decided to show her my house. She toured every room in my house, which is very simple and plain, it meets my needs being single, nothing more. Then we are heading to the movie and she says she is too tired
to go. I then take her back to her place and she invites me in. She makes 2 phone calls in Mandarin and then she tells me she is going to a friend’s house and I must leave.

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Now I know something is very wrong with this picture. When I was leaving, she promised me that the next time we will go to see a movie after dinner. I'm thinking "yeah, right". At this point as far as I was concerned, there would not be
a "next time" as I took this as a major slap in my face. Then to add further salt to my wounds, I sign on to MSN before I go to bed and Mai is online. Now I'm very pissed off! Too tired to go to a movie with me, but not too tired
to go to a friend's house or be on MSN? So I instant message her and she tells me to call her at this Taiwanese guy's house (the guy she was with when I first talked to her, probably her boyfriend) and this just led to a heated argument.
Actually, I probably should have just let it go at this point, but she pissed me off and my temper took control over my usual rational thinking. This whole series of events caught me so off guard to the point that I was way beyond any rational

Then a few days later, a good friend of mine tells me that Mai goes to a dance club
every Thursday night and she pretty much gets shagged by the first horny guy that she meets.

This is a small town, and where there is smoke, there is some fire. I then confront her with this via e-mail since she won't answer my phone calls (again I should have let this go along time ago) and this led to the following confrontation. The next
day I am called to the front of the store only to be greeted by a sea of black hair. Mai stood there with 2 of her Thai friends. Three against one is not very good odds unless you are Chuck Norris or Steven Segal, so I get 3 of my employees to
join me just in case they became violent (I’m not stupid, these 3 girls could have kicked my ass) Then this Thai girl says” is my seeeester, why you do dis to my seeeester?" All the time with Mai (the Taiwanese girl) crying
on her shoulder. Then Mai steps forward and she says”: I wanted to talk to you in private, but” and then she starts chanting in Mandarin. Then I have her chanting in Mandarin and Thai girls cursing me in Thai and Mai just walks away
crying. Then one of the Thai girls holds a copy of one of my e-mails up in the air in an obvious attempt to cause me to lose face. She goes to an American customer and asks him if he wants to read the e-mail. He says “No I don't, it's
none of my business! You are acting like an idiot and you are making
a fool of yourself!"

I then tell the girls that I'm not going to discuss personal business at work and I ask them to leave the store. They refused to leave. I then told them that I would call the police if they didn't leave.

One of the Thai girls then said "OK, you call police, we show them e-mail."

At this point, I decided not to call the police because they could have charged me with
"Harassing communications", but I could have also charged them with "Trespassing and disturbing the peace", but I should have called
the police anyway because they did.

My next page to the front of the store was to meet a Police Officer. He simply took me
outside and gave me a very kind "ass chewing" He gave the Asian girls an "ass chewing" also and that's the end of it. Actually,
we all could have ended up in jail, but for some reason, we didn't.

Something went wrong between Mai and me at the very start of this story. Maybe I should have shagged her at her apartment, but she didn't seem to be that kind of girl. But then again, why would a 20 year old Taiwanese girl go out with a 45 year old guy like me when she has very many younger and better looking guys on campus to choose from? Maybe I shouldn't have touched her on her shoulder? This is by large the most confusing experience that I has ever happened to me. I just don't get it.

Stickman's thoughts:

What did you say in the email?! That could be a whole submission itself!

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