The French Connection
I got that French guy Manolo talking to me and explain his side of the story. He is aware that I am putting it on the Stickman page.
“I owe you my story with her.
So, my story: A good friend of hers from Cashinsmart University introduced us to each other in June 2003. We talked a lot on chat, and it appeared that we had some feeling for each other (at least, it's what she said). And we decided to try to be bf/gf and meet as soon as possible to see if we match. We met in April 2004, when I was on a 2 weeks trip in Thailand (I was student, and not enough money to stay longer). I had 2 wonderful weeks in Thailand, and fell in love both with Nadja and the country.
Then I had to come back to France. We decided to meet again in October 2004. Wasn't easy to organize, but she finally came (I paid the whole trip for her, which, believe me, is not easy when you are student with no income. But, I was in love…) She stayed 3 weeks in Europe: 2 weeks with me full time, and 1 week with her family in Berlin (now, I wonder if she only met family in Berlin, or another guy…)
We had some arguments while she was in France (she was moody, impolite and things like that, which is not a normal attitude towards a lover, especially when you didn't meet him since long time) but when she left, she had many tears, saying "I love you". Naturally, I believed it was true. (It's possible but hard to fake tears.) She told me she was about to go in England (and short time in Ireland) in may. We planned that she spend few days in France, but she never came and she sent me email to break. She pretended she was in England with her sister.
I had doubts about her several times. She was often asking for money (I rarely sent her money, as you know I was not wealthy), and complained she had not enough (which was surprising as she said her parents were wealthy). She said she wanted at least 2 million baht from me for wedding (I'm not so familiar to Thai customs, but a friend told me that it's not so much surprising, if she is really from a “high society” family).
I loved her a lot, yes. It broke me when she left me. I asked her if she had another guy, and she said "no", and added that she never cheated on me. I can understand that love might fade away. So, we decided to stay friends, as I was convinced she never cheated on me. (Humm… now, I remember she often said: "I prefer to break with you now. Or do you prefer I cheat on you?" She was convincing in her way to say she never cheated…)
Of course, to know what you told me will greatly change my relationship with her. By the way, she told me 2 weeks ago that she had a new boyfriend, who was very old (which look like the one you told me about). A few days later, she said she broke with him…)
I had also doubt last summer (2004). She had problems with Internet, and asked me to check her emails for her (not read emails, but delete spam, things like that). She gave me her login and password. And one day I saw an email which had a curious object. Pushed by curiosity, I made something Ishouldn't have done (privacy is something I respect a lot, but this time, I was pushed by bad intuition) and I read the email. It was from a guy, saying things like "I must know you better before to marry you"…
Of course, I talked about it with her, willing to make it clear. She quickly avoided the subject (saying that it was a mad guy) and get angry cause I wrote her email (about how she was putting it: I did wrong, but not her. Her reaction was very hysterical, like she was trying to hide something…).
[some private details missing]
I'm waiting for your comments if you have any. Be sure I have no hard feeling towards you too.
(comments Statler: Manolo describes a person I simply don’t know. Not that I don’t believe him, I believe every word he said, but she was never impolite and moody to me. I have to give her that much credit. I wonder why they spoke about dowry and stuff. To me it seems after reading this, she wanted to get married as soon as she could. She never said anything like that to me. One thing I simply just don’t understand is why the hell she gave him her email password. Did she want him to find out that other guys are also interested in marrying her so it would speed up his decision? This is very interesting. Readers suggestions are welcome.)
THE THAI GIRL’S DEFENSE: I AM SORRY ABOUT YOUR BANK ACCOUNT.
Welcome to Reality TV: This is the conversation Manolo had with Nadja after I fed him some information about her. I left it almost untouched and I wanted to give the girl a platform to speak up for herself, so to speak. To be perfectly honest, I feel sorry for that young French guy and I hope he will get over his trauma. I don’t know how this would have affected my life, if I was his age (he is 24). But please read the whole thing, in my opinion it is very informative.
Manolo : hello
Manolo : I had an interesting conversation with an old friend of you…
Manolo : don't be coward and talk with me!!
Nadja : yes
Nadja : I was out
Nadja : who was chatting with you then
Manolo : I had a conversation through emails with Statler & Waldorf
Manolo : who explained me with many many details who you truly are
Nadja : yes
Nadja : really
Nadja : so go talk to him and don't talk to me
Manolo : just wanna know your opinion about yourself, and tell you one or two things
Nadja : ok
Manolo : so, please, as an old friend, tell me what do you think you are?
Nadja : I'm myself
Manolo : ic…
Manolo : so, allow me few comments
Manolo : you are the worst kind of human allowed to be on earth
Manolo : you live in lie and you are a lie yourself
Manolo : are you really Buddhist? I wonder in what you will reincarnate
(comment Statler: That is a good question!)
Manolo : I offered you the best I could, you rejected it and cheated on it
Manolo : I offered you love and then friendship, you'll only have hate
Manolo : I think I never hated someone more than you in my life
Manolo : I wish you die suffering and rot in hell
Manolo : any comment would be welcome. What do you think about what I said?
Nadja : I hope you will be happy with your new friend
Nadja : one thing I wonder, you just chatted with him by accident ?
(comment Statler: First she shows forwardness/defiantness, then she wants to find out how the hell the French guy and me met. Remember: Thai girls don’t ever think we Western guys could be as devious as them. We guys need to stick together (on the Stickman page and in real life too), even we find out some stuff we don’t want to hear. But the naked truth is always better than sweet talk bullshit.)
Manolo : not really
Nadja : so?
Nadja : he found you or what
Manolo : he found me
Nadja : aha
Nadja : congratulations
Nadja : enjoy chatting with him then
Manolo : while I still trusted you blindly, he already discovered your true identity
Manolo : and discovered me
Nadja : good for both of you
Manolo : lol, how can you fake happiness now?
Nadja : anything else to say ?
Nadja : it's not fake but its funny for me
Manolo : yes, I'd like to tell you during hours how much you disappointed me and betrayed me and my family
Manolo : it would be fair from you to stay and listen all that I have to tell you
Nadja : and one thing, you can go and hang out with him, you will have some fun
Manolo : why that?
Nadja : I don't know he seems to be a nice guy isn't he ?
Manolo : well, it depends point of view
Manolo : I know he cheated on you too, which is bad
Manolo : but can I really dislike him for that? after all, when you dated with him, you were supposed to be my gf at first
(comment Statler: Technically he is right. But I would not go that far to call a long distance relationship with a Thai girl a real relationship)
Manolo : what is strange is how you can still look yourself in a mirror without see a monster
Manolo : you take advantage on me while I was blinded by love
Nadja : I'm not telling you to dislike him. He has not done anything bad to you.
Manolo : yes. But that's not the point. We are not talking about him. Don't try change the conversation
Manolo : we are talking about you
Nadja : and sorry for taking advantage and taking so long time to break up with you.
(comment Statler: Now she is incriminating herself. She admits that he was her victim.)
Nadja : I'm not trying
Manolo : come on! "sorry"! is that all you can say? sorry is the way of coward
Nadja : just say whatever you have to say then I can leave
Manolo : I was coward with you to always say sorry when you were angry
Manolo : of, if I can say whatever I want to say, I'd like you allow me maybe one hour
Manolo : it's not a lot, cause we will never talk again later
Nadja : sure
Manolo : I guess you can grant this to me
Manolo : just a question…
Manolo : did you have HIV test lately?
Nadja : better ask Statler
Manolo : ok
Manolo : do you think you are a bitch?
Vous avez envoy un wizz !
Manolo : answer would be welcome
Manolo : please, don't be coward, face me
Nadja : what did Statler say?
Manolo : he said you had STD, but no AIDS
Nadja : One thing why don't you just say whatever you wanna tell me, I don't have much time on this thing
(comment Statler: Here the poor cheated French guy wants to know if she might have a deadly disease, but she has no time to talk to him)
Nadja : ask him please what did he has/had
(comment Statler: This is an interesting point here. The Irish guy John paid for a total medical check-up for her after he found out that she slept with numerous guys without protection in the short time he was with her. Result: She “only” had Chlamydia. Of course I saw her test result too and without wasting another day I started to take doxyclin for a week, without clinically testing if I was infected or not. Her test result showed Chlamydia and nothing else. If I had taken an STD test myself I would not have found out more. And an “AIDS test” I had earlier this year anyway.)
Nadja : stop asking me question, I think Statler told you everything already
Manolo : yes, but please, understand me
Manolo : I'm about dying of rage, and, if I talk with you now, it's too feel better
Manolo : and, I feel I would feel better quicker if you answer my questions
Nadja : I don't understand, sorry. You talked to him, listened to him, so why do you want to hear from me? you believed already. Yes it can be true what he said.
(comment Statler: She is asking him why does he not come to her and ask her about her view of the things. Well I think he is trying to do just exactly that. And the last sentence incriminates herself. She admits that everything I said is true. And of course it is true.)
Manolo : lol! how can you be so proud being what you are? "Yes it can be true what he said". We know it's true
Manolo : all that I want is to talk with you to feel better
Nadja : and I find it's funny that HE Statler, found you to chat, especially about me.
Manolo : okok, tell me, then I'll have a clearer view of the picture
Manolo : I listen to you
Nadja : no don't I'm sorry I have other thing to do, that is why I ask you to say whatever you have then I can go.
(comment Statler: Now he really gives her a chance to speak. But she does not want to give her view of what happened. She just wants the annoying chat to be over.)
Nadja : and I dont think it's important
(comment Statler: Nothing negative seems important in Thailand)
Nadja : isn't it ?
Nadja : one thing about the dowry, how much I said to you ? ]
Manolo : humm, you said more than 2 millions baht
Nadja : okay
(comment Statler: I can’t believe that they talked about things like that. He was 22 when he met her. She was 18. How the hell would be able to come up with that money? He saved already a year for her flight ticket. What surprises me: The whole 15 months I was with her and I WAS with her, not like Manolo in a long distance relationship, she always said she wants to finish her studies first and would not think about marriage now. She knew that I would never be willing to pay a cent for her. I told her that about a hundred times just to make sure. And besides that, I don’t want to get married anyway, especially not to a Thai.)
Manolo : do you know you are breaking what might have been a good life for you?
Manolo : I'm not talking about me, here
Manolo : but playing bitch, always lying about everything…
Nadja : aha
Manolo : what will you be in 10 years?
Manolo : bargirl?
Nadja : ask Statler
Nadja : he knows everything
Manolo : come on, stop it! and answer me
Nadja : sorry I am not talking to those who judge me already. And I really am not interested to always defense myself from he had said. I'm tired
(comment Statler: All you get confronting a Thai girl with her lies is her defiance.)
Manolo : I know what I need to know from Statler. Just curious about your own opinion
Manolo : cause you have any defense? lol
Manolo : no defense for cheater. You cheated me, used me, lied to me, and broke my heart
Manolo : have any defense for this?
Nadja : I really am sorry for what I had done to you. I know you are a good guy but I just can not love you. And I really am sorry for that. But I'm glad that I did not persist and take adventage of you, even I know I can.
(comment Statler: “You were a good toy for me and I enjoyed playing with you. The moor had done its duty, the moor must go. And say thank you to me that I have not used you more.”)
Manolo : will you say you're a poor little girl which had no luck
Manolo : and "you appear to be strong, but you are so weak inside"
Nadja : sorry I did not learn to say that. and I never said that
Manolo : you know what makes me the most angry?
Manolo : well, if you would have cheated on me, ok, my fate, and only me is affected
Manolo : but you took advantage of my family too
Manolo : everybody liked you
Manolo : but you are nothing more like a cheat
Manolo : shit, sorry
Nadja : I like them a lot and appreciated everything
Manolo : lie lie lie
Nadja : and that’s also a reason I feel sorry for
Nadja : okay
Nadja : well, just say whatever
Nadja : I'm tired
Manolo : if you were sorry for them, you wouldn't have act like that, and be honest since the beginning
Nadja : I will listen as okay I was wrong.
Nadja : oh yes I am so happy, maybe I can be an actress as I can act and pretend all the time, I must be so famous, wow
(comment Statler: You don’t need my comments on that one, it is embarrassing enough)
Manolo : yes. Or you can be a bitch who will die in misery and when you'll die, you'll consider all your life, and you'll discover that you broke all happiness you could have had
Manolo : but, sorry, you're a bitch already, am I wrong?
Manolo : it make me vomit to remember what you said:
Manolo : "i will never prostitute, it's for low class"
Manolo : another thing which make me vomit:
Manolo : (i resume, cause it was longer)
Manolo : "oh, sorry, I broke your heart. But I never cheated on you. Can we stay friends?">>> "ok"
(comment Statler: I think that was from an email she sent to him or a chat they had in the beginning of this year to end their “relationship”. Technically they had been together for about a year I guess. And I am sure HE has seen it as a relationship and probably was even faithful to her. Yes, there are people like that in the world.)
Manolo : so fool I am
Manolo : you know, you break my life too
Manolo : and for that, you should go in jail
Manolo : cause:
Manolo : you broke my heart. Ok, I can understand that you might have find someone else. Let's say it's life
Manolo : you took advantage of my already poor bank account… Ok, I was blind and silly
Manolo : but now, I wonder how I'll be able to love so passionately and trust any girl?
(comment Statler: It is not a good idea to have a Thai girlfriend at a young age)
Manolo : do you realize you broke all my expectations and dreams?
Manolo : "away"? are you fleeing? you coward girl!
Manolo : (if you are there, please, tell me)
Nadja : I will never prostitute, it's for low class" when ? did I exactly say that? I dont think my English was that broken?
(comment Statler: She has the nerve to tell him her English is superior than his.)
Manolo : oh, I think I can find it in emails
Manolo : but it would need time to find…
Manolo : you maybe didn't used these words, but the meaning was it
Nadja : I'm sorry about your Bank Account. To pay for the tickets for me. And I hope you sold those jewelry you bought for me already. At least I never want that
Manolo : my grandmother bought it to make you happy, while her financial situation was not so good
Nadja : I know I could have that.
Nadja : NO
Nadja : I mean the necklace or whatever you said you bought for me
Nadja : this year
Manolo : yes, I sold it on ebay, half price
Nadja : I know everyone tried to help me. I'm thankful for that.
(comment Statler: She said a similar thing to me once when I asked her to return my 19,000 baht.)
Nadja : Maybe next time you should ask the girl first if she want that.
(comment Statler: That is true. He should have asked her if she really wants to go to France and not FORCE her into that aeroplane. That was not nice)
Manolo : is that the way you thanked us? cheated on me? Fxxxing there and there?
Manolo : saying "I love you" to anybody?
Nadja : everyday
Manolo : and you are proud of this? poor little girl
Manolo : with such way of life, you'll never find real happiness in your life
Manolo : you're so pathetic
Manolo : in some way, I feel sorry for you
Nadja : you are also pathetic, espectially Statler
Manolo : I don't know. I think I have better chance to find happiness by being trustable and right
Nadja : I hope he will let me go off his life very soon
(comment Statler: Yes, soon. But first we get even. Always remember what JFK said: Don’t get mad, get even!)
Manolo : but..; why do you think I'm pathetic?
Manolo : because I'm there now talking with you and saying how much I hate you?
Nadja : no
Nadja : but because you don't have your own point but always be dragged by people.
Nadja : well, I think I better go. You take care and have fun with Statler. If you got anything more to complain just send me email then.
Manolo : ok
Manolo : I hope you will answer my email
Manolo : it would let me feel better if you answer
Manolo : can you do that?
Nadja : sorry. I will do what I want. if I don't answer you just ask Statler then.
Manolo : I'm just curious about how you can live being such a trash
Nadja : good bye.