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Dawny’s Bedtime Stories Part 3

  • Written by Dawny
  • September 29th, 2005
  • 7 min read


PART 3

It was hot and dusty and the road ahead was congested by motorbikes all getting in the way of one another at the junction. The traffic lights took an age to change and the four men entertained themselves by trying to find the bike with the most crammed onto it. The winner was a small moped with dad driving with child in front, two kids and mum holding a babe in arms all sitting at the back with a dog sitting in the front basket barking its head off, at the side there was a cart piled high with fresh fruit with all the components of a stall folded on top. “That’s amazing” remarked Brad “how the hell do they all stay on?”

The traffic began to move and Sarod skilfully weaved around the motorbikes, crossed the Sukhumvit road and headed towards the golf course.

“How you feel this morning?” Sarod threw the question out generally. The consensus was not too bad, considering. Despite self made promises of an early night before the game not one of them had managed it, the bars and the girls had won again!

The road made its way past numerous spare parts garages crammed high with tyres and rusting vehicles, in between there were small family run shops, yards where spirit houses were made and stored and small plant nursery’s. Every few miles groups of make shift stalls appeared selling fresh fruit and vegetables or cold drinks served in plastic bags. Food hawkers pushing loaded carts struggled along against the traffic, whilst road workers toiled hard watering the central reservation, pruning the plants their heads shaded by huge conical hats their faces protected by towels so that only their eyes could be seen.

The car turned off the main road and a sign announced that they had arrived at “The Royal Siam Golf Club”. Pandemonium then ensued as golf clubs were unloaded and players organised themselves. John looked on with an amused look on his face, he didn’t play but had come along for the ride and now whilst he looked at the chaos before him he couldn’t help thinking this was the reason why.

Sarod took charge of the scene and soon all was organised and buggies were brought forward with their compliment of caddies. “It’s great here” announced Stan “you can’t cheat or anything ‘cause the caddies do it all for you”.

The caddies climbed aboard the buggies and off they drove to the first tee. The noise from the crickets was deafening as they stood overlooking the first fairway, they all took their separate turns and teed off, striking the balls with varying degrees of success. The caddies duly set off to find them and the players were ferried to their next shots. Eventually the green was reached and the golfers took their turns to putt the ball into the hole.

“Ever had a hole in one?” Adie asked “Not on the golf course” came Sta’s course reply followed by sniggering from the others. They moved to the next tee and the game continued. As the heat of the day increased so did the humidity and the need to replace lost fluids, luckily Thai golf courses are designed around this idea with bars placed frequently around them and the players made sure that each one received their attention.

By the fourteenth the novelty of the game was wearing thin and the effects of the night before were beginning to hit home. Lining up to tee off, Stan shanked the ball way off to the side, swearing under his breath, he stood aside to let Brad play. “Too much last night mate” came Brads comment. “You only live once” was the reply. “Hey who was that you were with last night she was stunning” said John. “Oh that was Joy, found her in the World Bar”

“Boy she could play with my five wood any day” grinned John.

“You should get out more” giggled Stan “Anyway where did you disappear to?”

John just smiled, “Come on then tell us” demanded Adie.

“Oh me and Annie went back to the hotel she was tired”

“Tired my foot, bet you had a wail of a time” laughed Brad.

“Obviously not as good as Stan, he can’t even hit the ball straight anymore!”

“You’re only jealous, not my fault you’ve decided to stick with the one girl” Stan made the comment as he climbed into his buggy which then headed off for his next shot.

John had within a few days of arriving in Pattaya found a girl he was very happy with and had settled on having a long time girl leaving the field to the others!

The caddies carried on; pointing out the best way to take the shots, what clubs would be the better to use, what obstacles were hiding behind the trees and valiantly trying to guide the men around the course.

After five hours the green of the 18th hole was reached, play had become rushed towards the end and Sarod and Stan had begun it appeared to lose interest in the game. Adie lined up his ball on the green and gently hit it towards the pin, “Nice try Adie” commented Brad as Sarod rushed forward tapped his ball in the general direction of the pin and picked up, he glanced at his watch and then gestured to Stan to hurry up. “You got to be somewhere mate?” questioned Brad, Sarod just grinned and glanced at Stan, he grinned too and the game was declared over. “C’mon lads lets pack up and head back, Sarod has to go to the airport to fetch a friend and there’s somewhere we want to go first”

“OK, but can we stop for a drink somewhere?”

“Ah no, ehm believe you me, you will prefer to have a drink at the place we’re going to now, trust me” Stan remarked.

Thanks were exchanged with the caddies and tips handed over, clubs packed away and the return journey back to the city was begun. Sarod drove quickly down the main road and then made a series of turns down small roads crammed with shops, people, dogs and bars; this was a new part of town that the Pattaya virgins had not ventured to before. The bars were full of girls looking good, smiling and attracting attention, the atmosphere here was however slightly different. It seemed more business like, not as relaxed as the previous bars they had frequented. “What’s all this then?” growled John.

“Butterfly Bar” replied Sarod as he pulled up outside one of the establishments and made a hasty exit out of the vehicle. “What goes on here then Stan?” asked Brad as he too got out of the mini bus and perused the scene.

“This my friend is a short time bar, there are small rooms out the back and the girl’s out front, put two and two together and I’ll leave it to your imagination what you can make that add up to! Or you can just plonk yourself at the bar and have that drink you were on about……up to you, but I know where I’ll be; for just a short time of course, remember Sarod has got the airport to go to! This is our after golf treat, I mean you have to wind down somehow after a hard day grafting on the golf course don’t you?”

Looks were exchanged from one to another and decisions made. As to who enjoyed what whilst they stayed for that short time is yet again another kind of bedtime story, needless to say they all went back to the hotel happy with the kind of day they had had, whatever they had had, for after all it is the land of smiles.

Stickman's thoughts:

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