Stickman Readers' Submissions May 24th, 2005

Three Thai Girls


Let me start by saying that I was introduced to this site by a Thai female(!!) about 6 months ago. She wanted me to read some funny story on here when I mentioned to her that I was going to Thailand and after I finished reading it, I proceeded to read
on, and on, and on. The night grew dark and I had read probably 35+ articles from Stickman’s site before I went to sleep. After many of the articles I exclaimed out loud “holy shit! that’s brutal!”, or something to
that affect. After a few months, I had read through the majority of the articles on this site and became familiar with many of the authors through their writing. I had read case studies about relationships between Thai women and foreign sponsors
in the past (in a book from my sociology class), I had also read many guide books and works of fiction based on Thailand because I had planned to come here some day. It was all very fascinating to me.

Anyways, I will have to remain vague about some details in this essay, please forgive me but as I mentioned before, I was introduced to this site by a Thai girl, so it’s probably best that I not give out all of the details as apparently
some Thai girls get a kick out of reading this site. I am a 25 year old male, from an English speaking country. I had recently graduated from college when I decided to head out and explore the world. I first stopped in Taiwan for 3 months, then
I had hopped over to Japan, where I spent almost 1.5 years working (that whole experience deserves its own website, under construction!). After serving my time in Japan, which I thought to be a great place, I flew to Singapore and proceeded to
party for a month before making my way through Vietnam and eventually to Thailand and Bangkok.

He Clinic Bangkok

I got myself a 90 day tourist visa prior to entering Thailand, and then I proceeded to get myself setup in a modest 13,000 baht studio in central Bangkok. I did all the tourist things, went to all the markets, ate all sorts of food, visited
temples and beaches. After about 6 weeks of being in Bangkok, I grew tired of being alone all the time. I had learned from my other experiences in traveling, especially in Japan and Hong Kong, that making friends with other foreigners can be difficult
at times, because you are there by yourself and all of the sudden you have no friends, you get bored and because of this you decide to lower your standards regarding who your friends are. This can lead you to make friends with people who you generally
would not associate with back home for one reason or another. So needless to say, when I arrived in Bangkok I was alone.

After my first month and a half I set out, my goal was to interact more, talk with people, and make contact with people who seemed to be of decent values. I am not a sex tourist, nor am I a backpacker. I am not an English teacher. I guess
I’m just a tourist who stays for long periods of time in other countries with no specific goal other than to set out and see something new every day. Something different from my own culture. That is how I ended up on this side of the world.
So I researched on the internet, asked various people, chatted online with some young Bangkok people who were
my age. I found out where people my age congregate and I too began to go there. I went to various nightclubs where people my age
go out; The Bed, Q Bar, Roof Top Bar, Lava Club and countless other places. Generally not places where you find bar girls and older ex-pats. It was in these places is where I had my first contact with the middle to upper class, college educated
early twenties Thai women that I would soon be spending more time with.

I am generally not attracted to Thai women. I do find some of them to be extremely attractive, but not the vast majority. Everyone has their own tastes and tend to prefer tall, slender, light skinned women. I tend to shy away short, round
and brown women, but once again each guy is going to have his own likes and dislikes and I know that one woman is not superior to the other in any way, just different; it’s just a matter of personal taste, especially since I am a rather
tall guy myself at 189cm. It was only at this point in my stay that I actually started having conversations with Thai women, seeing how they acted and observing them. I will give my accounts of three different women that I met. All of these women
are college educated, one of them having completed college overseas. None of these women know each other, and none of them is / were my girlfriend at any time. (Names changed)

CBD bangkok

1. Ami is 24 years old, her father owns a travel company here in Bangkok and also has translation contracts with various companies throughout Bangkok. She lives with her parents in a nice house in Bangkok. They do very well for themselves.
She is the only child and graduated with a degree in Business. Ami is quite witty and very quick to answer any question you may ask her. Ami is average looking, not-so-light skin, average face and style, but has an AMAZING chest. She is very popular
with foreign men and Thai men. She prefers foreign men. Despite having graduated from college, Ami has no job and yet has money to go out (this should raise a red flag). I met her in a club and while I was waiting for my drink she was standing
next to me receiving her drink. I casually asked her what she had ordered, as the drink was brown in color. Without answering, she shoved the straw in my face and I took a swig. It didn’t even have alcohol in it; it was some kind of shake.
She handed me her phone and told me to program my number into it, and as any man of the 21st century should be able to do, even after having downed a few ‘Jack and Cokes’, I expertly programmed my number into her mobile phone and
saved it in under 10 seconds.

Soon after that the calls began at all hours of the night. She was lonely, she was bored, blah blah blah. I was not really attracted to her, so I decided to just ask her some questions, not fearing any negative thoughts on her part as I didn’t
plan on trying to date her anyway. After having her tell me that she was lonely and wanted to make out with someone (yes, literally!), I jokingly asked her, “so how many boyfriends do you have?” Ami paused for about 4 seconds. She
was not her quick and witty self as she replied “what do you mean…….?” “I mean, how many guys are you going out with, how many men do you have? Don’t worry I won’t judge you or anything…” She responded
with “Well I have two right now but I’m going to break up with one of them soon…”. Wow. I sat up in my bed and propped myself up against the wall while I egged her on; “Just two?” and she replied with “Well
I have two in Thailand, but also one in America and one in France.” Wow. Stories from the Stickman site flashed back into my mind as I heard her words. Amazing. Here was this girl, middle class, definitely not a bar girl, even educated
and she too was juggling all of these men both on the internet and here in Thailand! Her man in America was only 21 years old, the French man 26. She was dating an Italian and an American in Thailand, at the same time! Apparently none of these
guys were / are the wiser.

Ami is not the type of person I would associate with back home. I keep her at arm’s length and don’t really go anywhere with her, but at the same time I am fascinated and I love asking her questions and hearing her replies,
it’s good for some comic relief. I tell her that if I see her out with a guy, I’m going to walk up to them and ask how her other 3 boyfriends are doing. I am only halfway joking when I say this, but she laughs.

2. Wendy is a Thai girl that I met at a club here in Bangkok. She was there with three friends and one of her friends grabbed me from the bar and dragged me over to meet her. That’s where it all started. After talking and again punching
my phone number into her phone, we began go out together regularly. Wendy lived at home with her mother, father and brother. She also had a university education (abroad), as did her brother. Her parents own a string of successful auto dealerships
and live in an above average house in Bangkok with two nice cars. Wendy was working at a large airline when I met her. We started going out together quite frequently, though not really dating. I found that her English was perfect and she had a
good sense of humor and style. I was interested in Wendy, but I had my guards up as this is a foreign country and I was unfamiliar with everything at this point. Plus, there was something that just wasn’t right and I couldn’t pinpoint
it at first.

wonderland clinic

I am a picky guy. I have unreasonably high standards and these standards have left me single for two years. This is a result of having dated the most low-down, lying, cheating and crazy woman possible in my home country. So anyways, I finally
pinpointed what was putting me off about Wendy, she was constantly telling little white lies! We were at a nightclub one night, sitting in the lounge when Wendy spotted one of her “friends” and he came over. She introduced him as
‘Sean’ from Australia. Like most Thai girls who speak fluent / semi-fluent English, half of Wendy’s friends are Farangs, and of that half, 100% of them are male. I don’t know if other people have made any observations
about other Farangs my age in Thailand, but from what I have observed, MANY of them are less than reputable individuals. ‘Sean’ for one, was into drugs and reeked of weed smoke just standing next to me. I asked Wendy how many of
her Farang friends were involved with drugs and how she came to know ‘Sean’. She replied very quickly and expertly with, “oh we’re just friends, and he’s gay.” Funny, because I didn’t ask her what
her relation to him was, I just asked how she met him.

What was also funny is that I had seen ‘Sean’ not five minutes before in the line to the men’s restroom, making out with a girl. He most certainly was not gay. I guess she didn’t want me to feel like he was ‘competition’,
or her former lover / sex friend which is VERY likely. From that point forward, when ever I would ask her about various Farang men that called her on her phone, or talked to her online, she would respond with “oh, he’s gay”.
I am not a meddling person, and Wendy is not my girlfriend, I would just ask her these things casually to make conversation. It was quite obvious that most of these men were in fact not homosexual, it was just a little white lie aimed at making
me feel more comfortable with her talking to all these other men. Whatever. She isn’t relationship material anyway, I was just bothered by the amount of times I caught little white lies rolling off her tongue so EASILY and casually. It
was so natural for her. Soon after meeting me, Wendy told me that her parents were moving “down south” and she did not want to go with them.

That sounded suspect, as they had a successful business here in Bangkok. Wendy had plenty of money, but instead of getting her own place, she moved in with one of her Thai friends. Her Thai friend is a little bit lower in class than Wendy
is. Wendy’s Thai friend spends a lot of her time playing cards (gambling) and drinking whisky. She has zero money management skills and constantly borrows money from Wendy, who now has no job. Wendy willingly lends money to her gambling
friend, a few thousand baht here, and few thousand there. Never to be re-paid. What is Wendy’s excuse? She told me: “I tried to tell her no, but she saw how much money I had in my wallet so I had to lend her the money!” You’re
kidding me right? -I thought to myself. You see, in my home country, it generally goes against the conscious decision making process of any educated person to lend money to someone who gambles and cannot manage money. But Wendy’s logic
is different, it is Thai logic. As a result, she is losing her ability to be financially independent and she is living with someone who is leaching what is left of her money in that grandest Thai fashion.

Wendy also despite now being unemployed has told me a few times that she has to go “out of town for a few days on business”. She has to do this for “a temporary job that I got from my cousin’s boss doing paperwork…”.
Once again, this could be true but it sounds a little bit suspect to me. You maythink at this point “Ok Wendy has got to be a hooker, as that is bargirl lie # 5431 that they tell to Farang men when they are going out with another customer”.
But no, she is not a hooker, she has money, considerably more money than a bargirl or hooker could hope to have. She is probably going to meet one of her ‘gay’ Farang friends, haha! I just wonder why she lies so often (her parents
by the way, had not moved as she claimed, as I found out when I ran into her brother and he told me that she had simply left home and that her parents were giving her money!). I am also bothered by the fact that it is so easy for her to lie, so
natural, so casual, and she follows the lie with words like “sweetie” or “hunnie”. I noticed that when she tells a lie, she looks down to the right, away from my eyes and immediately follows the lie with “sweetie”
or “hunnie” even though we are not boyfriend / girlfriend. That is her give-away. Every card player has one, and many poker players will hide their eyes with glasses in order to prevent people from picking up their ‘give away’,
Wendy’s is more obvious, though it seems she is very comfortable with lying at this point, which indicates to me that she has had quite a bit of practice. She is also, by the way, extremely proficient at poker, and I don’t know if
that can be any type of indicator about a woman’s personality, you be the judge.

I also try to distance myself from Wendy now. Her friends are mostly Farang druggies and Thai gamblers, people I find myself not really wanting to associate with too much. What disturbs me is that from the outside, she has the appearance
of a pretty, stylish, high class Thai woman. Nice clothes, her makeup isn’t slutty, she wears all of this expensive designer crap, her English is PERFECT, she is University educated, and from a good family, yet she surrounds herself with
the lowest common denominator of people. If you saw her walking down the street, you’d never know. You’d think that she was one of those light skinned, tall and skinny model girls who wouldn’t give you the time of day, the
kind that are reserved for truly rich men. If only we could get inside the minds of every girl we passed on the street….

3. Girl three is a bit of an anomaly. Her name is Cynthia and she is 24 years old. I met her at a café just waiting in line for some coffee! Cynthia is highly educated and speaks fluent English, I’ve never heard her make a mistake
with English. She and her family have traveled abroad quite a bit. She is very pretty and very stylish. She takes good care of herself and it shows. No tight, fake jeans with rolls of stretch marked fat hanging over the edges. No sir. Cynthia
works at a multinational corporation in Bangkok, and if I mentioned the name, you would all recognize it for sure. Unlike many Thais, Cynthia draws a multinational pay check as well. She has her own condo and car. She lives alone. I thought I
had hit pay-dirt with this one, as she was single and very pretty. She is the type of girl that I could also go for back in my home country where attractive women are a dime a dozen. She seemed normal enough, and showed interest in me very quickly.
Like the women I have mentioned before, Cynthia for some reason has a disdain for Thai men, and refuses to date them. I find it ironic however that all of these women despise Thai men, and yet from what they tell me, the Farang men they date treat
them no better and womanize to much greater lengths. Go figure. It was the same back in Japan and Taiwan. Same story, different country. I am undecided with Cynthia as she is neither a liar nor a slut. She is a pretty, educated girl with a good
job at an international financial institution and has a nice place. She supports herself 100%. She is well traveled and we share many of the same interests. What bothers me is the fact that her friends are mostly all hard drug users! Is this like
a running trend in Thailand? I’m not talking about burning some ganja either, I’m talking about these girls popping pills, doing lines and smoking yaba! I’m just not into that whole scene, especially after reading
about how ‘fun’ it is in Thai prison. I can’t help but be amazed at how this sample of women from middle class Thailand behaves.

Where ever there are drugs, there are people who need / want money to buy drugs. In that situation, there are usually people who will steal money / ask to borrow money. I’m just not comfortable in those types of situations, nor do
I want to be inside a car or with a group of people who get caught with drugs. That being said, I’ve met a few more females who are very nice and educated as well. The more girls I meet here, the more patterns I see. I’ve seen bar-girl
like behavior exhibited by quite a few middle to upper class Thai females. Dating multiple men and having sugar daddies overseas is a concept that has crept its way out of the bar and into some parts of mainstream middle class Thai society. I
have a realistic outlook on my future. I cannot live here forever, the salary is too low, the career prospects are very poor for a recent graduate like myself. I do enjoy it here and I would like to stay another year. I have kept myself out of
the bargirl / gogo scene but honestly, after spending quite a few nights with non-bar girls, I’ve sometimes felt the temptation to just go out and have a straight shag, no strings attached. Just hand over some money, have a shag, and be
done with it. Luckily, my fear of STDs and general lack of attraction to bar girls has kept me clean! I find myself not wanting to learn about the women I meet because more often than not, they’ve exposed some pretty nasty habits after
I’ve gotten to know them.

Here are some pointers regarding some of the more obvious deceivers I have
come across:

– They throw around the words “sweetie”, “hunnie”, “darling”, “I luv you”, even though they have only known you for an hour and really know nothing about you.
– They ask you nothing
about your life back home, your home country, your culture, etc. When you try to volunteer some information about yourself or your culture / home, they change the subject or show zero interest.
– They DO ask you about work, school and how
much money you make. – They show zero interest in anything outside of Thailand (maybe this is common with many Thais?)
– They go out with you, fully expecting you to pick up the tab for EVERYTHING, when the bill comes at a restaurant, they
stare off into space. This is before you are even dating them.
– They tend to be clingy. They form some type of mental ‘relationship bond’ with you right away, so that even if you have just met them, you are ‘cheating’
if you look at another girl. They instantly want to hold hands after just having met you in a bar or club.
– Their cell phones are filled with names like Larry, James, Robert, Richard, Brian, Fred, Vince, Stanley, Randy, Bob, Ricky, Dave and
50 other Farang male names, with maybe 5 Thai female names.
– They have no job, but somehow have the money to go out every night. And they never offer to split the bill with you anyway!
– They are extremely proficient at using the internet,
typing English emails and are constantly popping in and out of cafes to check their email (this could obviously apply to normal people as well).
– They get calls and SMS messages late at night. When they get a call, they feel the need to walk
into your bathroom or outside your apartment to take the call, and they talk in hushed English to the person on the other end.
– When you ask them who is calling them at 2am and speaking English to them,
they tell you “My Thai friend
Noi” (who doesn’t speak English). Or “It’s my gay friend”
– They are unemployed or have a stable job and yet at times they must “go out of town for business this weekend”. In my country, secretaries
don’t usually have to travel out of town for the weekend on “business”.

Stickman's thoughts:

Very nice submission, but damning! I loved the bit from the girl who kept saying that the blokes were gay.

Unfortunately, you only need to be sure that you have been told one lie to know that there are heaps more.

nana plaza