Stickman Readers' Submissions May 19th, 2005

How To Tell Her To Piss Off

by Denver Guy


This is a reply to Union Hill who wrote "Piss Off And Leave Me Alone".

He wrote that he is running out of bars to go to because the same girls comes up to him and won't leave. I have spent many hours in Bangkok bars of all types (gogo, beer bars, Soi33) and I have some suggestions that might help. Point
by point:

He Clinic Bangkok

He wrote: "Does this happen to everybody or am I just unlucky?"

Neither. I think you are bringing this on yourself. Read on.

He wrote: "usually at random, a lady will come and join you. … She will sit and chat with you and she will be very nice. You, however would prefer to be talking to another girl but as you already have the company of this lady, changing
her for your preferred target is not an option."

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This is where I think you are mistaken. Changing lady is almost always an option, and there is a good way to do it and a bad way to do it. When the girl approaches you to sit down, you can just wave her off as if "I want to be alone".
If she still comes and sits down, you can have one minute polite conversation with her and say "I just want to watch the girls dance, OK mai?" Don't have conversation with her, do not buy her a drink, show no interest in talking
to her. This is not rude because she approached you unsolicited. This is hard to do at first, but the girls actually appreciate it because they are not wasting their time with someone who is not interested in them. If she just will not leave,
then go to the toilet or go outside and fake a quick phone call. Once she goes away, you can make goo-goo eyes with the preferred target or wake her over and go from there.

If you buy one girl a drink before (the worst thing you can if a girl approaches you unsolicited, if you buy a drink you are now valuable to her), it is still possible to change lady on your next visit. You can tell her "I am a little
bit butterfly" and "I want to talk to that other girl, do you know her?". Do not buy the one you want to get rid of a drink! Give her a 50 baht tip (or 100) <why?Stick> and ask her to bring the
girl you really want to talk to over. Do this all with a smile on your face. She will do it. You are then rid of the first lady forever. Never buy her a drink again, never give her any tip again.

If you get sick of talking to your new girl, repeat the above.

He wrote: "On your next visit to the same bar, you still have your eye on your original target but the lady that sat with you last time sees you come in and makes a beeline for you. You are now her regular …"

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This will usually happen only if you bought her a drink (depending on the bar). A tip to bring over the new girl will get rid of the old one. Do it with a smile on your face, but do not cave into to any pressure to buy a drink for the first
girl.

He wrote: "The girls seem to have a working code of ethics at these places so none of the other girls will bother with you anyway once you have been bar coded as "Ae's customer" or "Bee's customer"."

True, but you can avoid becoming Ae's customer by NOT buying her a drink or applying the advise above.

He wrote: "Do you bluntly tell the little princess to piss off and leave you alone? Is there a softer way of saying this? Even if there is, the other girls are not going to bother with you anyway after you do."

If they think you are rude, then the other girls will not want to be with you for that reason. Be nice and smile, but do NOT buy drinks for girls that you do not want to talk to. Simple in concept, really, but hard to implement depending
on your disposition.

He wrote: "Oh, and by the way, once you do barfine one of these girls this problem gets even worse "

If you've barfined one girl once before, this is more difficult but not impossible. And example for me is in Sheba in Soi Cowboy. I barfined Girl-A there, nice girl, went back a few days later and I want to try a different girl (for
research sake of course!). Girl-A came over and jumped on my lap, as expected. I bought her a drink but told her with a smile on my face "Ihave sanook with you, but I am butterfly little bit, I almost never go with same lady second time.
I am sorry. Can you help me find another lady, maybe your friend? Dai Mai?" and I immediately gave her 200 baht tip. She then told me who were her friends, who was "lady no good" and who was new to the bar. Brought Girl-B over,
Girl-A filled Girl-B in on what the deal was with me, then Girl-A went to dance. I didn't take Girl-B, but the next time I went in, I repeated the process (I forget if I even tipped Girl-A). I pointed to Girl-C and Girl-A brought her over.
I barfined Girl-C on that visit. I have now barfined two dancers and a waitress from Sheba, and I can still return without getting my dick sliced. Why? Because Girl-A saved face by helping me and helping another girl and I am as JaiDee as a butterfly
can be because I tipped Girl-A and I did not bullshit or try to sneak around.

There is a girl from Soi33 that I have slept with many times (sometimes at 1am when her bar closes, sometimes afternoons before she works, sometimes I paid the barfine). There is also a gogo girl I see regularly. I would not try the above
technique in either of their bars, they would lose a lot of face because I am a repeat customer ("special customer") for them. And I almost NEVER go to either of these two regular girls' bars. There is no reason to. If I want to
spend time with them instead of them working, they can just meet me outside the bar. If I am paying the barfine, I just give them the barfine money directly, they settle it up with the bar themselves. (Any girl who insists you have to visit their
bar on the day you barfine them is doing this in order to get you to buy drinks at that bar.)

Your problem with Mon might be caused by you buying her drinks. She also sounds like a pain-in-the-ass and maybe she is to be avoided by not visiting this bar (you're unlikely to have fun in there with her around).

Stick's suggestion (tongue-in-cheek, maybe) to go to Pattaya won't really help until you solve YOUR problem of getting rid of unsolicited girls. In Pattaya, it might even be harder, as (in my opinion) there are more desperate girls
there and it is harder to find the cute, nice ones.

I know that some of this is harder to follow through with than I make it sound, but stick to your guns, don't buy ANY drinks for girls that approach you unsolicited, and do everything with a smile. Good luck.


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