Sister Bangkok. Yes…I am in love with this dirty whore of a city. This crazy grid of hovels and sky scrappers. The broad avenues that go nowhere fast. The taxi clogged sois where misery lives while gripping a dirty steering wheel. The home of filthy
klongs and mesmerizing pollution enhanced sunsets. The lovely street vendors living hand to mouth, just trying to survive one more day…while the bloody touts and the free lance whores live like there is no tomorrow. Yes, Sister Bangkok is my
tee ruk at this very hour and I have paid the bitches barfine and we are going ‘long time’ tonight. Suddenly I have an epiphany and all at once my eyes are opened I am privy to her entire grim design. The once great Siam civilization
in the terminal stages of a slow but steady mental, moral and spiritual decline. A terminal cancer grows inside her. I am bedside this night and she is in her death throws. She groans with pain and calls for her drug…‘I’m coming
my darling’ I say soothingly. I know what she wants and I gently insert the needle. Money is her morphine and I Falang, I am her dealer.
Tonight when I chase the dragon through the streets of Sister Bangkok I will become a third world man without a soul, a name, or a country. For me this will be the culmination of a decade long one-night-stand with this dirty whore of a city
that I love so much. This night is a real occasion and in the 72’ caddy with me tonight are my aged friends, Jim Beam and Jack Daniels extraordinaire. ‘E! ‘E!…Slow down…bi cha cha man!!’…Yeah, E’s…he’s
my driver and his eyes appear reptilian in the rear view mirror as we crawl these dirty urban streets looking for nubile young things. He’s always drunk nowadays… but at least he’s a stoic drunk. You’ve seen his kind before.
Eyes always bloodshot red and skin darken by the sun but still ruddy from too much of the bosses Jack Daniels. Yeah…E loves his Jack. But that’s my fault. I love his crooked smile man, and I could never bring myself to let him go. Out
of respect I call E the quintessential, diminutive, Thai every-man. In ten years as my personal driver and house man we have seen and done a lot of shit together. From the slamming of local brewed meh khong whiskey shots with Thai para-military
types to pulling me and my 9MM out of a crooked card game in Hua hin right before I was ready to kill. We’ve fuckin’ done it all.
Well…Sister Bangkok is with us now and she rides along with our motley crew and we pass her around like the cheap whore that she is. This crazy broad goes anywhere and does anything with us. She knows I’m paying and it’s just
one more expensive kiss off for her. Nights with her is like a Sunday in Tijuana…It’s cheap but it’s not free. I tell E to drive west on Sukumvit to the Golden Hotel when my mobile rings. It’s my regular squeeze ’Nut’
on the other end and she’s checking on the arrival of her Jim Bean on ice. She’s got a wrap sheet a meter long and the boys in brown know her by name. Yeah…she’s got a damned interesting story. Claims she was born on the
floor of a Bangkok noodle shop and weaned on hard ass luck, she knows how to handle herself though. I’ve seen her jump the turnstile going to the sky train and flip off the cops all without missing a beat. Then there was the night she pulled
a six inch double edged knife from the top of her go-go boot to fight off an attacking gang of Katoey, all the while she was on her cell phone talking to a clueless sponsor from New Zealand. WTF!?!?! This girl is a colossal disaster but she does
have a way about her. No matter…I am one fucked up piece of work myself with all kinds of ‘issues’ pre-Bangkok, post Pattaya. But that’s another post in my next life.
E pulls the caddy over to the side of the soi and Nut flips him off as her standard way of saying hello. She hit’s the top of the car with a loud thump and lets herself in without missing a beat. I say nothing but point to her drink
that’s been cooling on ice. She ignores it and goes straight down on me while I watch the passing neon lights slide by behind the tinted glass. She and I have a running bet. It is my claim to have never been made to finish while having
a BJ and it is my contention that no one including nut can ever make me finish unless of course I choose to. Our long standing bet is for one million baht and as Nut knows I am man true to my word and will not renege on my bet thus…she is quite
persistent in pursuing the, as yet, unclaimed money.
E never bothers to put the privacy glass up anymore that separate him from my sin. He’s now my accomplice and completely complicit in every way. Gone are the days when E had any modicum of discretion. He is obliviously and happily
inebriated and my cares have gone out with my decorum. The end of an era has arrived tonight. Now… I feel I am one with this whore whose lips are wrapped around my cock and I am rampant with her disease. My blood is in her now as I let go and
I feel a million baby baht swim free and change the course of her entire families life…Forever. She is caught off guard and she chokes but manages a gulping smile that appears strangely in the shape of a dollar symbol.
Come to me my sister Bangkok. I have given you what you wanted. Money is your morphine and I have just delivered your drug of choice and your chemical romance has now begun. This crazy grid of hovels and sky scrappers. Where lovely street
vendors live hand to mouth, just trying to survive one more day…while the bloody touts and the free lance whores live like there is no tomorrow. I am so in love with this dirty city. Sister Bangkok is her name.
Comments to follow, I think…