Readers' Submissions

June 1991 My First Trip

  • Written by Anonymous
  • April 21st, 2005
  • 6 min read


Black Pagoda Patpong Bangkok


You don't know how lucky some of you to have a site like Stickman's. He don't know me and I am not trying to get a brown tongue. So here we go, 1991 no web sites, no computer, I now nothing about Thailand apart from Yul Bryner playing the king in the film "The king and I". But I am reasonably street wise well in Farangland.

Feb 1991 my brother said to me fancy going to Thailand. He's older, wiser so I thought? booked the flights and one of my friends just split up with he's girlfriend so I said join us two we are going to Thailand in may around £550 for the flight on Qantas he said a bit expensive as my brother went six months before and paid about £425, in the end he booked when we get near the end of this money well spent. May 24th 1991 were on the flight as my brother has been there before he knows the ropes so I thought again ,He's telling us how much the bar fines are in Patpong how its cheaper in Pattaya how much the bar girls want for the taxi fair in the morning but sort it out before you pay the bar fine. great he knows the score remember the last sentence because this comes back to haunt him and I'm not joking hear.

We arrive Don Muang clear immigration collect luggage we go outside get a meter taxi takes us to the hotel where my brother stayed before checked in safe deposit box sorted shower change to more suitable clothes for the climate. My brother said He will take you somewhere you won't believe your eyes. We said ok show us Bangkok. He told the taxi driver where to go we turn up at the back of some building I didn't feel to happy being there as the three Thai men outside looked dodgy to say the least at this point I'm thinking slow down a minute this don't look right to me my brother said what's the matter I told him what I thought he laughed we go in up a flight of stairs through some doors.

Bang! It hits me a glass screen with about seventy girls in there I said what happens here, he said lets sit down order a beer take your time see what the number is tell the Thai guy give him 1500 baht and we all meet here after. I have heard about these massages so I started to look the girl are trying to get eye contact two minutes I make my mind up told the Thai guy the number give him the money she comes out smiling hour & 30 ins I come smiling I have been in Bangkok for four hours the last two more like heaven. Anyone who hasn't had a soapy or a Thai sandwich you don't know what your missing.

Same day 8pm we go to Patpong what a shock see a few shows razor blades, pussy painting etc.not my cup of tea so we go to few gogo bars and around midnight I'm thinking a bit of company for the night told the lads they want to carry on drinking & looking at the gogo girls I want to get into the bedroom with a little cutie, this how green I was then see a girl walking round the bar very smart silk suit I thought she's got a bit of style that's the one for me told the lads and my brother said not possible as she is the mamasan (I know what your thinking mamasan there old & ugly as. f..k) No this one wasn't well I was a bit pissed now there a challenge back then 1000 all night was the going rate but there was only 42 baht to the £ now 72+. Approached her asked if she would like a drink you know the answer to that not many bar girls & mamasans refuse drinks she spoke a little english then I new two words of Thai thank you and no thank you. Normal questions where you from what's your name etc. I then said I would like to pay bar for you. She said no can do I cannot leave the bar told the lads, my brother (know all) or thinks he is, started laughing. I thought fair enough he must know something I don't so I went over to her again. I said 1500 before I said baht she got someone to cover for her and her bag and we was in a tuk tuk heading for the hotel. Won't go into the nitty gritty but had a good night I must of been a bit drunk because I have not seen a good looking mamasan since then well that's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Skip the next two days go down to Pattaya check in at the Carlton hotel on second road near soi 2 at the time not bad 500 baht per night now its very old. This is how prices are now you can get a nice hotel in soi Diana for 500-650 baht per night brand swimming pool cleaned daily & clean towels sheets etc. Getting back to story the Carlton hotel is opposite Sabbai room now we now them as fish bowls but you can get a soapy in there now all in 1600 baht back then it was 350 for the soapy & 1000 baht for the bedroom Olympics 14 year only increased 250 baht not bad value and your getting 72+ baht to the pound sterling. First night in Pattaya we go to soi 2 for a few beers then on to walking street now its about 11pm walking street is buzzing my brother take us to the marine bar and disco upstairs boxing downstairs were having a good time then I heard a voice say how you doing it was one of my brothers friends from the UK sat down had a beer with him my brother ordered a bottle of Mekong whiskey large bottle of coke & a bucket of ice for the three of us had a couple of glasses couldn't drink anymore so stayed on the beer my brother was getting drunk by now and he had a freelancer hanging around his neck as I said earlier I was green for Thailand but I could see what was happening, him drunk gold chain around he's neck a few thousand baht in his pocket but as he's been to Thailand before he's in control he thinks so I told her to piss off but I let you know I have never said it to a bar girl or freelancer since as I have seen what damage they can do with a Heineken bottle. to be continued police, guns, visas, prison, money, & immigration all in 23 days over wait 500 baht.

part one might be a bit boring but part two is scary.

Stickman's thoughts:

I'm in NZ at the moment, so no silly comments from me on submissions for a week or two…