I’m Boning Your Bitch
I'm a Caucasian man in my early 30s. I've read this site for a long while and it makes one think the women (bar girls) usually want as much money from farangs as possible. I almost feel if they have a choice between love or money, they'll take the money. I understand my role to them much more based on that thinking alone. I am aware of the exceptions of course.
My technique is to show them a good time on date 1 and 2. This doesn't need to have much to do with a lot of cash but just to make them less like hookers. Movies, dinner (always Thai food or they often seem restless if I dare say sushi), massages, sex, etc. All said and done, I keep the payments very modest (never more than 1000 baht long time) and I think that actually buys me respect.
Ask any bar girl which nationality pays her the most, hands down it's the Japanese and Chinese. Why do bar girls fleece these men for 3000 baht per night or less? I think it's a variety of reasons which I've heard include the men's lack of desire for confrontation / haggling and possibly their perceived economic situation. All in all, they think little to nothing of these men once the payment is made.
With me, there are exceptions but I find the bar girls wanting to sleep over after work and spend the next day with me. I think the activities we do gives them a semblance of life not as a prostitute but as a girlfriend. I'm not here for 2 weeks. I live here in Pattaya now. I don't buy them gold or give their parents cash. I'm not being cheap but I do try to distinguish myself from the hundreds of other farangs who deservedly get the ATM title. I want to add, if you push me, I'll push back. If a bar girl bullshits, ticks me off even in the slightest or clearly isn't pulling her weight in bed, I won't pay her and tell her exactly why. 9/10 there is no argument from the girl because I think I make her realize the error of her ways. Quite a challenge coming from a farang new to Thai life!
In the various trip reports I read on this site, not every girl is a winner in bed. We all know a starfish simply lies flat and unresponsive. Why pay to shag a lifeless hole? You're better off wanking yourself. When you pay a lifeless shag, you're only encouraging her. If money is #1, then you have to ask yourself who is the boss, you or the pussy? In a stereotypical way, even though I'm fully aware the relationship is based on cash, I occasionally find myself acting like a kind generous boyfriend which goes against my principles with prostitutes that I must pay but it happens regardless. The working girls have feelings for me at times and sometimes they do want more or so it seems.
I was recently making plans to move in with a bar girl (gasp!). We discussed all the logistics and everything was looking good for the move to take place. I must have been so pussy whipped because the issue of me paying her anything never came up by her or I. I guess she felt she had to raise the point and that is when our entire negotiation fell apart. One minute we're jokingly discussing if we'd prefer having a boy or a girl and the next was "fuck you too!" at the elevator door. This breakdown really disturbed me although I really should know better as I'm no novice. I must confess my plan of retaliation was already brewing in my mind: I would go to her bar to apologize, re-gain her trust, and then fuck her over once I got tired of her. I could be brutish about it and just walk her to the curb or make up something like my ex is coming back to Pattaya.
Interestingly, girls looking for a farang boyfriend are very quick to examine the possibility that there's no possibility of a girl coming into the picture (to steal their loot!). I guess there's no double standard there with any bar girl we meet because you know her "boyfriend(s)" lives 235442345 kilometres away in Auckland, Amsterdam, or Alabama.
Dear reader: Do your best not to fall for their charms. Don't be an idiot and send them money when you get home. There's always exceptions but why assume yours is one of them? Why is there a need for private investigators in Thailand to monitor these bar girls you're supporting? Let me put it a little less academic, I am shagging the girl you are supporting. I don't pay her much because you are so generous. I know you would rather be in Thailand now but when you do come back, they'll be thousands more girls as good or better than whatever you're hooked on now. You'll see them in the arrivals area at Bangkok Airport. I know you miss the girl who kept you up at nights on your vacation but she's with me now and we're spending your money together. Anyway, you get my point.
Yep, these working girls tend not to be faithful.