Readers' Submissions

Moaning Bar Scene Guys

  • Written by Anonymous
  • March 7th, 2005
  • 6 min read


I thought after reading the Thai girl's comments I had to write in. At last someone with a brain and some morals.

After visiting Thailand for the 7th time in so many years I was beginning to think I was in a different country. Being a keen reader of the Stickman site and the readers’ comments for nearly two years and never written in I felt this was my opportunity.

The Thailand I read on here was alien to me, bar girls, sex, bar girls and more dirty tales of sleazy back room fumbles. As I said I am a regular traveller to Thailand. I have a Thai wife of which we have been happily married for over 5 years now. I’m 28 and she is 31, we met in Australia while I was a poor skint backpacker and she was a poor, skint student. We met in a famous backpackers haunt in Sydney an Irish bar full of travellers telling tales and sharing the odd drink or ten.

I turned around to see my 2 very pissed mates trying to chat up 2 Asian girls and felt god I must rescue these 2 girls before they get eaten alive. Now they are not bad guys it's just the accent is so strong even other English speaking humans cant understand them, so I felt I had to step in.

Well that split decision changed my life forever.

So as I rescued them it was plain to see that one girl was very attractive and the other equally as the one I tried to chat up couldn’t hardly string a word of English together so I felt I was wasting my time, I tried my luck on the next one as you do….we got chatting said she was from Thailand and at that stage in my life I never really knew too much about Thailand only that it was famous for lady boys and food.

So as the night went on I got drunker and drunker as you do…and tried the same old tricks when you are free and single on a night out….got her number and then tried for a snog…now I'm not big headed but I usually get a drunken snog no problem, it's not that hard I guess…but she was having none of it….which impressed me…and off she went…

6 months later we were sharing a place together…and then the crunch came, my one year travelling visa was up….what to do..???

We were clearly in love with each other….she was perfect….good looking, intelligent…a real sweetheart…and not a bargirl. Never had been…. an educated girl. Her dad was immigration police officer… (Handy eh)….

Anyhow…we decided we would come to the UK for a month to travel meet the parents etc etc…. the plan was to get a fiancé visa and I would try and to get a visa to live in Thailand… but as things went on we had a brain storm….why wait?….what’s the point of a fiancé visa? It meant she couldn’t work in the UK and so we decided we would with my parents' financial backing to open a Thai restaurant…Aussie style casual dining and fresh…

So 2 years down the line the business is going strong and we are very happy…we got married in the UK and then in Thailand. And we are now thinking of having kids.

The point I'm trying to get across here is I have never been in a go-go bar or brothel in Thailand or been with a bargirl. I just have seen a totally different Thailand …my wife’s family are middle class but no way rich. Her sister works in an advertising firm and all her family work for a living …no bargirls to be seen…

They have never ever asked me for money or anything like that. No tricks or lies…although when we do go for dinner its usually us who pays for her parents but with friends we all share …the farang has never been asked to pay for anyone, only her parents…which is understandable….after all I would pay for my parents…respect thing. All her friends have decent jobs and I have not heard of or my wife doesn’t know any bargirls…

I feel so ashamed when I walk down the street in Bangkok and see these big fat sweating low life’s holding hands with young girls from the country…I guess its there business, but it is very sad….when my parents were here on holiday I felt disgusted….and ashamed….

And I ask all these guys who frequent the bar scene why? Why take the risk? Of catching AIDS or STDs? If you are looking a girl for love why not try and learn the language and meet a decent hard working girl…

I read week after week about these guys moaning about these girls scamming them for money….guys WAKE UP AND SMELL THE COFFEE…they are hookers and want money….do you really think they want a fat balding fat bloke? Get real….its your western money they are after…think of it like this.,….if you went to see a hooker in your own country and tried to date her….they would tell you to f**k off…why? because they don’t want love they want money, same applies in Thailand….only they see as a walking lottery ticket and a passport to new life….my wife sees it even here in the UK….you can spot a bargirl a mile off….dark skin…bad style and a big fat old husband…makes me laugh…but hey not my business.

It s the moaning gets to me…guys what do you really expect from a girl who sells her body? She obviously has no respect for herself, so why would she have any for u?….and think about this…if Thailand had no girls for example….would you be there? There are plenty of other countries where if there were no women you would be quite happy….I know hard to believe but hey…

I search endlessly on sticks site for stories of real people, real life not hanging out in a brothel.. skipping thought bargirl stories…zzzzzz…yawn same old crap….I want to hear more from the decent expats there, no more bargirl stories please…same old…are there any family men here in Thailand?

We are considering moving there in a couple of years to live…but I want to know what’s it like as a married man considering having kids living in BKK…Thai people love kids as you know, and we have a great network of friends in Bangkok….life could be good…just I worry about the social side of things.,…I want to meet and have some decent friends the not those involved in the bar scene….would love to hear of stories from you guys…

On another subject altogether …And wait for this I have just had her parents living with us in a 2 bed apartment for 6 months and her sister..!!! Talk about testing times…I guess if I can survive that, I can survive anything…but that’s and another story all together…

Just concurring with the Thai girl who wrote in to defend Thailand and make all you low-lifes think about what you are actually doing to Thailand…would you put up with it in your own country?

Stickman's thoughts:

The bar scene plays a big part in the lives of farangs in Thailand, hence the number of articles on the topic. I for one enjoy the articles of guys getting scammed, not the fact that the got scammed, but just the general warning that it gives other readers who hopefully won't fall into the same trap.