Readers' Submissions

It’s Not Always About The Money

  • Written by Anonymous
  • March 24th, 2005
  • 9 min read


Black Pagoda Patpong Bangkok

By The Director's Wife's Disciple


Hi Everyone. Have been reading the problems a lot of men have been having with Thai woman, all seem to blame the culture, or money. How many Western woman also love the money, pretty well as much as any Thai woman I think, maybe worse.

I work with Thais at work and the owner where I work often talks to his wife about Thai women. Seems they are not all after money as many think they are. She was saying with them and many other Thai couples, they work together, and pull their money together as a family, which to me sounds a good idea, as two can live better than one. How many Western couples can marry and put what they both earn together, the western woman wants her money and yours also if she can get it, and seems western couples don't work in together.

I found out that the Thais where I work always pull in their money together as a family. Also can a western male handle the love a Thai woman has to offer. Once again talking to The director's wife at work about Thai relationships etc they have. It seems the love they have for their husbands is far deeper and more meaningful then a western relationship.

What is wrong with western society when they say I love being out with my best friends, spend as much time with them as I can have fun, yet meet a nice woman say I love you, you're my best friend then say your crowding me, we are seeing to much of each other etc.

Seems the Thais at work never say that to one another, and love being with each other. This is what love is, they are meant to be your best friend and lover, so you want to spend as much time with them as you can. With a loving Thai couple this is how they are.

Not only the director's wife, but all his sisters are here and I see this all the time with them.

To me the trouble is too many western men cannot handle true love, with a Thai woman with a good man she gives all to him and she becomes his life as he becomes hers.

Is this not what we all seek, this is true love at it's best.

I have seen this with my own eyes and asked the director's wife often. Talking to her about Thai/farang relationships, seems the ones that work the best have this attitude of they are their lives and spend time with each other and heaps of it.

Love is like a brand new car, if you want to keep it you have to clean it, polish it and keep it maintained, don't do this then it will get dirty and break down, same as love. It needs to be maintained, so you have to put lots of time into each other for a relationships or marriage to work. At work The director's younger sister has hooked me up with a Thai woman in Thailand, and she is learning English for me, and hopefully maybe able to see her at Xmas, and propose marriage. < Always a winner mate, meet her and propose. Actually, why not propose first and then meet her?Stick>

I have written to her and text her and her Uncle can speak English and reads them to her. And we are so in love and have so much in common. She is willing to take me as I am, not into the money seen as many Thai women are.

She wants to be happy with me and I with her. We will learn about each other's culture. I am learning Thai slowly and don't see the cultures as a problem, but we can both see it as a learning experience and learn about each other's cultures.

How often we blame culture for breakdowns etc. It is like saying since my father was an alcoholic so will I be, but we all know it does not have to be.

How many times do we all say I grow up like this so cannot change? We make choices and don't have to be like the alcoholic father, or locked into our cultures.

To fall in Love with a Thai woman is it not better to learn from each other and learn the cultures from each other instead of battling and blaming each others culture. It's not the culture for either the man or woman it's about the choice we don't want to change.

Seems in the West we are bought up to believe if you see too much of each other it's over crowding, or seeing to much of each other, but a loving Thai couple it's about each other and your family are your life.

This is what I want. If you found the right woman and know it's true love then how can you say we cannot love each other 24 hours a day?

I have seen it in posts about Farang/Thai relationships where the guy says exactly that, how can we be in love 24 hours a day?

Yet with the right person how could you not be. Got a love for cars then how can you not give it all your love and attention, your always polishing it cleaning it loving it, but when it comes to woman it seems over in the west we cannot give deeply to one another.

I have seen it reading many posts about Thai/farang relationships. Thai woman when they are so in love with you they give it all to you, and if your not prepared for this then don't fall for a Thai woman else you will not last in a marriage.

I have seen and heard from the director's wife this is the case, and western men and Thai woman with great and successful relationships are really into loving a Thai wife and not backing off as we are taught in the west. Seems we are taught if someone really loves you then run away say your crowding me, smothering me etc, but in with Thai woman it's I want to be with you always be in your life, be beside you your my life.

Seems many good western Thai relationships the man takes time also to learn her culture and she his then you can come halfway together you learn to understand one another not fight cultures, you bend your cultures mould them into a slightly different form, you take parts of each others culture, but also never give them up, you're not afraid to learn.

Also often there is the money situation, you throw heaps of money at any woman, Western or Thai they will all take it and want more. The money situation is a problem with all women from all cultures.

Have you not heard of the saying in the end times people will be lovers of money, and the root of all evil is the love of money.

No wonder it is hard for anyone to find true love when they place money above love. Was talking to the directors wife a work and they used to place money above love, and I talked to her what I have talked about here how love needs maintenance just like a car, and said her and her husband found this out and now place each other above money and it works.

You love each other first and you get the money anyway as your both willing to work for it together. Only here in the west her money is her money she keeps it and over here also you the man earns money and that is also hers.

With the Thais here it is the money they both earn they share it together.

With my Thai girl I have said I place love first and her over money and talked about what I have said here regarding love and she knows what she is getting from me.

If I love her so deeply how can I say she is crowding me, or smothering me. I want to shear her in my life and she becomes my life and the most important part of it. Seems in the west this is not the case, and we are taught if it's to much love then run away. Seems with a good Thai woman they love this attention and love and pay it back to you many times over.

Love given is love returned, back away from love and each other then you end up going separate ways. As happens here in the west.

Seems at work they are looking after me, and the Directors wife wants me to have a very good Thai woman as I am not happy with any Western woman, they are so cold and the love from them does not last. She interviewed and asked the directors sister about the Thai woman she has hooked me up with to see if she is a really good woman for me, and is now happy she is.

Seems they are all happy for me and says we will both be good for one another. My girl In Thailand is happy and full of love and praise for me and her family are happy for us both.

This is my observation of really good Thai relationships. Sure they are married to Thai, but she also knows very happy Thai/farang couples and my observations of both being interested in each others cultures hold true to their good relationships, they don't blame cultures but learn each others cultures so they can help come to understand each other and even in many cases speak each others language. This is also want I want to do because when my Thai woman is with me I want her to teach me Thai, if I love her so deeply why would I not want to know about her Language and culture?

It's an advantage for both of you, also if she really loves you then why would she not learn about your culture also?

Everyone blames cultures but the whole point is you both can make choices but put the blame on cultures it's to easy to blame a culture or religion. We are all given free will and freedom of choice but few of us use it and put the blame on something else.

Stickman's thoughts:

Sorry, I am not convinced…