Readers' Submissions

This Is My Story

  • Written by Tong Dee
  • February 11th, 2005
  • 6 min read


By TongDee


Just found Stickman on the net and read almost all submissions. Now thinking about while reading, I think its up to me to send in my story.

First of all I'm wondering why almost all stories based on relationships between bargirls and farangs. I remember only a few stories on the board, telling a story about good running relationship and marriage with happy end.

So now my story, starting in 1996 when I started to get divorced after being married 10 years with a European girl and 2 kids.

While being married, there comes a point when you ask yourself, if all this (hard working, building up a nice house, making money) is all you can expect. Your wife always has headache or something else, and you find out, the best medicine to make your wife feel better is money. So at this point I've been asking myself, why do you pay all the time for only a little bit of fun in your bedroom? There must be much more than this. Ok, when you are the Dad of 2 wonderful kids, you decide not in a second, but after a time I decided to get divorced. I didn't want to go on like that for the rest of my life. Now I was divorced, single (without girlfriend) and part time dad of 2 kids. It happened that I met a woman when I was on a business trip. She was older than me by about 4 years, a native Hawaiian, half Japanese half Hawaiian. It's been a great time and I found out that a man also can be spoiled a lot, just the way I wished it would have been like that before.

Unfortunately it didn't work with her kid and my kids. I guess the main point was the way of American thinking and acting about how to treat kids. Ok, I was single again. Working hard and thinking about what to do.

In the year 2000 accidentally I found a dating service on Excite.com. It was free at that time and I sent an ad into this service with one photo showing me and my kids. So everybody could see and read the truth about me. I got a flood of mail from around the world. One mail was very interesting to read and I answered this mail. It was from a girl from Thailand and she also sent 2 photos for me. I have to say the photos have been very ugly because it was scanned very badly. But the way this girl wrote was very warm. So we have been going on to write e-mails. Later on, after a few weeks we wanted to hear our voices and I made first phone call to her. Hmm, nice voice and the voice was going together with the new photos she send for me by airmail. I have to tell you that before I started writing to this girl, I knew where to find Thailand in a map, never have been there before and didn't know much about people and country. So I started to find out as much as I could find on the net. Message boards with horrible stories about Thai girls made me to get confused, because I almost couldn't find any good news on the boards. But I learned a lot about traditional things, behavior and family ties, including money.

Whenever I talked with my pen pal once a week and my kids have been around me, I gave chance to let them talk to my girl too. My daughter, at this time 11 years also could talk with my girl very good (oh sorry, English is not my native language) and I could see already that my kids wouldn't have any problems with this girl.

So at the end of year 2000 I decided to get a flight to BKK to meet my girl. I have to say while writing and talking by phone we both have reached that point where to decide to cut relationship or to go on really serious.

My heart already told me: That's it!!! Before we met in BKK. What to say? She picked me up at the airport and we started to get to my hotel which she already booked for me. We started sightseeing around BKK, she showed me her business (she run business with tiling floors with marble and granite for Q-house BKK) Its been exciting for me, same way she was excited about me. We went off to see a girlfriend in the province. She was managing a Wedding Studio and we took some nice photos.

After this 2 days trip we got back to BKK just to check in to get a flight to Chiang Mai for another 2 days. Valentines day in Chiang Mai, Riverside restaurant, nice tasty meal, live music and a wonderful girl beside me. Wow!

After that back to BKK and first time I met her family. A nice house and great parents and sisters.

After being introduced to parents, after meeting her girlfriends at Hard Rock Cafe off we went to Samet Island for a few days.

Its been a great time, I met a great girl and during my stay we both decided to go on our relationship. My girl gave up her business and arrived in Europe spring time 2001.

What to say? We have been happily married since 2001, my kids love her, my parents loved her from the first second (also my very old fashioned dad, because my girl like to drink German beer with him) Our wedding party in BKK one year later was great.

My girl learned German language, got a job, has driving license and her own car.

Now I know very well that a man can expect much more than he gets in a "normal" relationship.

In a few days I will be 46 years, my girl is 38. We are one family, she love my parents, I love her parents and they love me. I am not farang for them, I am part of a big family, brother, uncle and son, and happy like never before.

1. Farangs are exotic and sexy for Thai girls same way these girls are sexy for Farangs.
2. Yes, my girl is sending money for her family. Why not? She's working and her money.
3. Normal Thai girls would like to meet normal Farangs for a long term relationship.
4. Unfortunately so-called sex-tourists and farangs with rude manners make them scared.
5. Thai wife would kill you or cut your best thing when you start to be butterfly.
6. Yes, your one and only also will show you nightlife in Pattaya or Patpong BKK.
7. Never forget that you are allowed to look delicious meal, but have to eat at home.

If people would try to get more information about Thai traditional things, family, Buddhist beliefs, sending money, they would be able to understand why they got into trouble. Doesn't matter if BG or normal girl.

Two of my now best friends got burned before, but now they married with wonderful girls. You can guess who helped them just little bit.

Take care you all and hope everybody will find the thing he's look for.

Stickman's thoughts:

Good to hear a happy story.