Readers' Submissions

Delightful Bangkok Music And Girls Part 1/4 Sukhumvit Zoo



Music and Thai lady aficionados around the world: Aren't you tired of picking up your cuties in generic a gogo dens with mind-deafening techno sounds and ditto girls? Do you really savour the "HellohansummanIgowithyou" mantra from pimpled faceless asphalt scratchers down Sukhumvit Zoo?

Unfortunately, Mr. F. never had the funds or the stamina to purport the industrial-scale whorism that is propagated on these pages. So when he actually hits town, he tries to enjoy a bit more quality – quality music and quality girls.

Mr. F., tired of lightning fast sperm-extraction, would like to play a bit of the traditional mating game, with body and soul moved by quality music live or canned; he fancies inspiring ladies who offer more than just opening their legs and hands. He'd even like to have the option of just having a good time and shaking a leg to quality beats without any willy-exercise at all.

Mr. F. feels: Bangkok's a gogos and beer bars only play their generic noisy soundtracks to camouflage that you have nothing to say. Is that a great setting to discover great females? Whereas, in places that are dedicated to a certain style of music and are open for dancing, you can at least enjoy sounds to your liking; and you can meet ladies who enjoy the same tunes – which might easily lead to more, anything from fun sex to even understanding. Dancing with somebody is a great way to find out more about her.

So Mr. F. has researched a few places around town and around SE Asia where reportedly you can have it all – good music and good, or good-fun girls for sale. All that in a relaxed relatively unpushy atmosphere which leaves at least something to the imagination. (And for Mr. F., imagination is always better than real life deliveries.)

Mr. F. visited places with live and with canned music. He found venues with hired ladies and with free floating hobby whores. The interested reader may follow Mr. F. on his trip through the Bangkok night:

– In this instalment, we start out on the eastern end of Bangkok's fun strip, on Sukhumvit road near Soi Cowboy; we then move to Soi Nana; these places sport hired sex workers.
– One submission later, we make it downtown to Ploenchit road and Siam Square, where upmarket freelance ladies can be had over tunes from live bands or CD players.
– In submission 3, we stop at Patpong for live music and more freelancers.
– Part 4 contains a homage to the freelance ladies you meet in music-oriented joints, from foreplay to pay time.

Our itinerary never takes you far from your hotel; if in need, a quickie can be bought in no time.

Country Road II

Where Soi 19 meets Sukhumvit road, smack on the pilgrimage trail between Soi Nana and Soi Cowboy, there is this half-wrecked three-storey building with, guess what, a bar outside and more bars inside. Walk into the ground floor bar to discover "Country Road II".

This delightfully dilapidated live rock joints reminds Mr. F. of the government youth clubs he frequented too long ago: A variety of wrecked tables and chairs, collected by charity, stand around with no system and no charm either, plus there is a bar. Customers hang out here and there, it is not full and not empty. There are none of those punters with shaved heads and tattoo exhibition, and nobody came in shorts or pyjamas. Most guys actually look a bit old-fashioned or just old. There seem to be no western ladies, but several Thai men came for a good time.

In all its delightful unkempt neglectance, which is so untypical of the otherwise highly organized Sukhumvit Zoo businesses, "Country Road II" does have its own style somehow. When Mr. F. pops in around 9.30 pm, a Thai band plays harmless 60s oldies like "Beautiful Sunday" or "Proud Mary".

Like every Thai music club, "Country Road II" has a gallery on the first floor. The stairway up to the very dark first floor is crumbling, the railing seems half-broken. The stairs immediately remind Mr. F. of those immortal song lines:
"I met a jigsaw bar room queen in Bangkok
[-Keith Richards guitar riff-],
she tried to take me upstairs for a ride…"
[-more Keith Richards guitar riff-],
Of course, it is nice to see the short-skirted well-built waitresses climbing up there; some ladies come back only after 30 minutes.

The waitresses at "Country Road II" are all easy-going, not stunning, but friendly. No bullshit, no attitudes. You feel like buddies after a few minutes. Lady drinks seem unknown, and they aren't very pushy about your refills. Pick anyone for a few dance steps, she will join you.

Waitress khun Aenn from Chumphon (29, 1 child) settles down with Mr. F., and they soon agree that luuk thung or songs-for-life music would now be better than the cranking "Morning has broken" from the house band; some heaving venue like Bangkok's popular "Tawan Daeng" pub, they figure. Aenn does a few animated dance moves; hey, she looks like great fun on the parquet, and that is a good sign for more intense sanuk later. She says, she would like to go to the "Tawan Daeng" music pub with Mr. F. – "but then you must pay 400 baht to bar". Only now Mr. F. realizes that the ladies here are on the take, too.

As always, Mr. F. thinks he can still find something better and goes to "Tawan Daeng" alone. Easygoing Aenn agrees with his solo departure and is not angry or sad. As always, Mr. F. does NOT find something better and around midnight returns from "Tawan Daeng" to "Country Road II". There, Khun Aenn only remembers him after his second order, but Mr. F. is not angry or sad.

The band has changed now. A few wild Thai guys plus a farang guitarist play blues, rock and southern rock, anything from Allman Brothers to Deep Purple to Eric Clapton – if you like the style, the skill and the groove are there. They have great fun jamming along with lengthy improvisation and even drum solos. There is this dark-skinned Elvis-look-alike of indefinable race on one table; he jumps up and takes to the stage, swinging a Stratocaster guitar.

"Country Road II" is heaving now, punters and waitresses shake a leg on the dance space and between the tables. The couples stay together throughout the play list now: Who-bonks-who seems to be sorted out.

Morning Night

Soi 3 or soi 5 are too much of a hike? Thank god, even Sukhumvit's seedy soi 4 offers mild music fun. Shortly before you enter Nana Plaza, there is the semi al fresco "Morning Night" bar. They play lots of western pop rock from CD, Bon Jovi can be heard a lot. Good to know they have Thai favourites on their play list too, this keeps your gal in a good mood. When the regular DJ is off-duty, though, music and sound may detoriate.

"Morning Night" operates in the daytime, too, and even then seems to be a fun place. Most hostesses there are quite down to earth, entertaining and more individualistic than your average generic dance pole wobbler; they have two pool tables, and talking is possible. Occasionally, the "Morning Night" gals start to dance and even get their drunk punters to move a bone or two. Some of the ladies are working there for many months already. Some are pushy about lady drinks and your drinks, others not.

One long-running girl in "Morning Night" once flushed to Mr. F.: "Oh, without a drink, I feel shy somehow." Not without an ironic smile. With a glass in her hand, she then calculated that this month she had already made 29,500 baht by being bonked, plus 7000 baht hostess salary from the bar. She had an eye on some land near Nong Khai, which would be suitable for a restaurant. On his last two stop-overs at "Morning Night", Mr. F. didn't see her again. Probably she's already doing catfish soup and Thom Ka Kai up on the Mekong coast; good luck too you, Lek.

If you want to stay longer with your girl, but don't want to be pestered about lady drinks, just shove 100 baht into her tiny receiving hand. Still the ladies are no freelancers, and they are more professional and slick than the true country ladies at "Country Road II"; so all in all you get a more business-like experience.

Stickman's thoughts:

Nice!