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Just Another Trip Report To (Yawn) Paradise



I have contributed to this post before, the most recent being “I Left My Heart In Pattaya,” which was posted about one year ago. At that time, I had spent two nights with two different bar girls during the trip, and had wonderful memories. Just to spark your curiosity, I only had sex with one of them.

A year later, a question remained in my head: Can one return to paradise? Or will the illusion finally vaporize and one realizes it was just the newness of it all? Well, after five further nights in Pattaya this past December, the illusion still remains. Pattaya is paradise on earth.

Five nights, with one night off in the middle, and four different beautiful Thai girls. My one night off, I went back to the hotel to take a small rest before going back on the prowl and what can I say? I woke up early the next morning. Sigh.

I went with a couple of ground rules in hand: 1. What happens in Pattaya stays in Pattaya. I was going to use whatever protective means and precautions were available to come back to the States in the same condition I arrived. 2. Try not to fall in love to the point of doing something stupid. Well, I fell in love four different times, trust me, but not enough to stay in touch with any of these lovelies. BUT I have a few beautiful photographs to spark many fine memories.

I had had good luck on Soi 8 on my previous trip, so that is where my adventures started. I soon found a cutie and brought her back to my hotel. Just like my last trip, sanuk (fun) was just as important to me as sex…and what better form of sanuk is there than foreplay?

I was able to convince lovely number one, Dim, to let me join her in the shower and we had tons of fun scrubbing and polishing. The shower then turned into a long, hot, soaking bath, where Dim wound up laying on top of me, a great vantage point for straying hands. Fun was had by all. I think she actually enjoyed herself! Wow! Imagine that!

The usual then ensued in the bed. No need to go into that. And although I had planned for her to spend the night, for some nagging reason, I was ready for her to go. What it amounted to was that – and I hesitate to say this for fear my fellow readers will think me a prude – she kept trying to open-mouth kiss me, and I was going to have none of it. Sorry – no exchange of fluids! I thought that was understood, but evidently not with all of these young girls.

This episode with Dim came back to me when my son told me a story his teacher had told the class. My son, never the shy one, asked what that red mark was above her lip. She then went into the whole story for the whole class about how her sleaze bag ex-husband was kind enough to share the herpes virus with her.

I was not going to ask her to leave, though. I thought that would be rude, but I went ahead and gave her the long-time fee of 1000 baht. I think she kind of caught my drift and she told me: I go now. I smiled my agreement and she gave me one more big hug before she went and with a big smile saying: I really had a good time!! Well, for whatever that is worth, it made me happy hearing her say that.

The next day, late afternoon, I decided it was time to widen my horizons and try out a Thai massage parlor. I was given guidance by my trusty friend that the Thai massage was an “honest” massage and the oil massage was the “naughty” massage. Well, I ordered the oil massage and received a wonderful hour-long massage while I was naked to every single inch of my body but one particular part. There was no happy ending. How disappointing! It seems I stumbled into the only massage parlor in Pattaya that didn’t get happy endings on oil massage. When I told my friend, he didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

Walking back to the hotel from my unsuccessful massage, I met Pum. She sure was a friendly lass. I met her in the late afternoon somewhere between Soi 3 and Hard Rock Hotel on Beach Road. I had actually spotted another lass, but upon closer examination girl number two had a sweeter, more innocent look about her, which helped float my boat, you might say. While chatting away, one of the girls gave me a free manicure, which of course I tipped before leaving. That was kind of neat.

Pum had been in Pattaya just a few months. Pum told me she would not go with a man she was not attracted to. I really liked her. She thought she was fat because she did not have super skinny stick legs, but I thought she looked just fine. Back at the hotel, I was happy that I was again allowed to take a shower with her. Wow! I was two for two in that department! I would have paid 1000 baht just for that privilege, much less spending the rest of the night with her.

The deed was done. She had very interesting birthmarks on her chest, which I actually found very attractive. We went back out, since it was still early evening, and wound up at one of her friend’s bar, where we killed time in classic bargirl fashion, playing 4-in-a-row, some dice game and playing pool. I felt really bad for her friends, as this bar was way out of the main traffic patterns. I wondered how they ever got any business. I am not sure where this bar was, but it was off some alley in the Soi 7 or 8 area. On a side note, I felt good that they were as bad at pool as I was.

Pum spent the night and in the morning I emptied my wallet and gave her all the baht I had…about 1140 baht. Hey, I am not stupid. I didn’t keep a lot of baht on me, but I think she felt good I gave her ALL the baht I had. I held up the American money and I go: MY money! Held up the baht and said: YOUR money. Yes, I am so funny. We went walking up toward Walking Street and had rice soup for breakfast with the ocean as a backdrop. Very nice!

The next night, I fulfilled a promise to my friend to visit the Tahitian Queen. Wow, Sodom and Gomorrah personified! Never in my life have I seen so much hot female (Thai) flesh in such a small area. A very friendly young lass had me convinced that it would be a great idea to have a threesome with her and her friend ALL NIGHT LONG. The downside? The bar fine before midnight was some ridiculous sum like 1500 baht each! I am not joking! This is serious! It was right before New Year’s Eve and the bar wanted to keep the dancers dancing and the patrons drinking. The plan was for me to come back after midnight and pay the discount 600-baht fine for both of them. I said I would give it some serious thought. I went back to the hotel to rest up till midnight and fell asleep for the night. Yes, I know, I know. But now I have a reason to return to Pattaya! Sigh.

I might as well put in here, I am in my mid-forties, in reasonable shape, and very appreciate of any and all attention I receive from the opposite sex.

For night number four, I was tempted to go back and see Pum, but I decided I was going to be a butterfly on this trip. Again, cutting down Soi 8, it was not long before I met Tee-ow. I was talking to her friend at the bar and somehow she caught my attention when she grabbed me and started a rhythmic motion against my pelvis area yelling: We will do it all night long! It was cute. She was cuddly, petite and – off we go!

Tee-ow was convinced she was ugly, although I had to disagree. (I thought she was a teenager, but she was 28 years old. Goodness!) She would say things like: In the morning you wake up and scream! She told me she was very interested in meeting and marrying a good farang man, but none of them would fall in love with her. She asked me if her being a bargirl would be an issue, and I kind of stumbled, responding to the effect of, well, all things can be overcome.

She had a child back with mom. She told me the child was conceived in a bout of childhood stupidity with a local Thai boy who she did not love. Of course, the young Thai boy just kept on going. She felt somewhat trapped in her line of work, as she had to support her mom and child. What is a girl to do? If any of you want to rescue her, I think I have her email hanging around somewhere, (maybe) along with a digi-pic.

Oh, yes. I almost forgot. We took both a shower and a bath together! That was as much fun as anything! I guess me and Dana have at least one thing in common. I have never gotten my balls stuck in a stepladder though. Oh, well. I can’t have all the fun. Three for three in the tub department!

Ah, now we come down to last night in paradise. Sigh. This night I never made it to Soi 8. I met Yu walking on Beach Road 2 headed toward Soi 8. She was absolutely perfect. Sigh. Thank God I have my digipic to remember her by. (Clothed, if you are wondering.) Petite, 20 years old, her eyes of the extreme Oriental variety, and a deadly, perfect smile. I must say about Yu, I am glad she didn’t pretend to fall in love with me. That could have been painful. A girl like Yu, I could very well imagine having her as my companion, my “special” friend. I could love her, but knowing that she wasn’t deeply in love with me could keep the whole thing in check and just enjoy the ride. Deep sigh.

Yu was the most reserved of the whole trip, but I was still able to shower with her. Four out of four! (That in itself made my trip a success, in my humble eyes.) I must say, sometimes what you see in clothes looks a bit different (and very slightly disappointing) without, but with Yu, things just got better. She was a walking piece of artwork.

She did not provoke or initiate any contact, but quite polite. She smiled the whole time. LOL Quite an enigma. She wrapped her towel back around her to sleep in, and I didn’t protest. I would occasionally give her butt a little pat and say “dee butt.” Ah, the simple pleasures in life. If anyone is interested in a digipic of Yu (with clothes) just send me an email. Breathtaking! But I am just a rookie. What do I know?

Well, I could tell all about how I filled my days and the trauma I experienced with family members thinking I was dead from the tsunami, but I have gone on long enough. The tsunami had an impact on my vacation, I must say, even though I was in Pattaya, and caused unwanted questioning into my travel itinerary. Incredible thing, that tsunami.

I was trying to think of a central theme to my trip to tie it all together, but I can’t think of one. The closest I can come is that a large portion of my life I have tried to lead my life in a way that others judge moral and correct. In a way, I still do. But I have come to a point in my life that I feel that Pattaya is the exact salve that I need to cure the cuts and bruises and bumps I have suffered in my life. I have paid my dues, I feel I have done the right things in life, taken care of my responsibilities, and sometimes the right, appropriate thing to do is to — play! I feel fulfilled and more complete because of my brief sojourns to sin city. Some people might refer to this activity with negative titles and adjectives, but the way I feel in my heart right now is that – I am just living my life and it feels damned good!!

Cheers to you, Stick, and all of your readers.