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More From The Lonely Professor



By The Lonely Professor


More from the Lonely Professor…

There is a certain Stickman reader by the name of the Lonely Professor who has admitted to being a regular patron of Bangkok’s naughty bars but at the same time doesn’t want other patrons sitting next to him to teach his children at an international school during the daytime. This hypocrisy has justifiably infuriated other Stickman readers particularly the ones who are guilty of such “double standards”. – Phil Ross (Stickman contributor)

Sorry Hoss, ‘er…Ross…or, whatever your name is…

If you read back you will find that I have never attested to being a ‘regular’ patron of any kind to any of Bangkok’s bars. In fact, you’ll probably find that my only bar days go all the way back to the days when I was a GI in Vietnam…where I did patronize Vietnamese bars on a regular basis. But, I did this between the age of 19 and 21 years old! And, I’ll have to admit, at the time the behavior was as much the result of ‘peer pressure’ than from anything else. I was a kid, I tasted ‘candy’, and I liked it.

Gosh, I think that was even the name of my first major heart attack in Vietnam: “Candy”.

Sure was.

Well, many folks knew her by ‘many’ names, but I knew her by her real name and she eventually became my ‘war bride’ and followed me home 14 years after I first met her as a GI in Vietnam in 1970.

…And it is a story about love, war, honor, tragedy, and dishonor…that I sometimes would rather not choose to think about.

All I can say is that what I did as a GI in Vietnam was done in as honorable a way as I could under the circumstances and that unlike a lot of others who had merely turned their backs on the situation they left behind when they got home, I didn’t – even though it took me some 12 years to retrieve the ‘baggage’ I had left behind…and I did it during a time when there was no established diplomatic relations with Vietnam.

Bargirls? Yes, I know something about ‘bargirls’…but, not ‘Thai’ bargirls.

At 54, I can hardly say that I am interested in women who’re little more than ‘teeny boppers’, who’ve little more to offer a man of my age but physical relief.

For the intellectual, aesthetic and ‘physical’ satisfaction, I have my wife. And, although she is Vietnamese like my first Asian wife, she isn’t and never has been a bar whore. This wife comes from a decent background, she has her own degree and today we have a 4-year old son between us. This was never possible with my first Vietnamese wife.

With all this going for me, why would anyone think that I’d be interested in Bangkok bar whores while teaching in Bangkok? Don’t you think that would be ‘a conflict of interest’ – on both a personal and professional level?

Unless a man’s a lecher and totally corrupted, it couldn’t be possible.

Anyway, Phil, you misrepresented me and I felt I had to respond. No, I was not a regular patron of the Bangkok night scene when I was living in Thailand. My wife is North Vietnamese and if you know anything about the women of North Vietnam, you would know that my ability to troll the streets of Bangkok at night while I was there was very limited…usually only restricted to getting home at night from a late class halfway across the city. Well, we all know how ‘traffic jams’ can be in Bangkok…but, along came ‘the skyrain’…and there became less excuse for getting home on time. Hanoi wives tend to have a ‘tizzy’ when their man is only a few minutes late…and, well if you want ‘peace’ in your life…it is best to do the thing that brings peace <sounds like you're under the thumb, sunshineStick>…and that didn’t include patronizing bars in Bangkok when I was there. Although I often scrutinized the bright lights of Bangkok’s nights with some nostalgia while I was there…I will have to admit that I was never tempted. And, well, if you’ve ever handled snakes before…love tends to take the wind out of you for that sort of thing.

So, fellas…think clearly. Please don’t mix me up with other people in this discussion. I’m being flat honest with you.

Why don’t we talk about something less sleazy…about some of the ‘good’ relationships that you have had with Thai women. What about regrets? Have there been any relationships with Thai women that you possibly regretted for not taking serious at the moment and lost your chance forever and ever with that chick? What about that kind of experience? Even with Thai bargirls, I bet there’s some that have had a few. When I look back 30 years ago, when I was a kid and wet behind the ears, I remember ‘relationships’ with Vietnamese bargirls…but never one that I walked away from and regretted and the only one I didn’t walk away from, I regretted and paid severely for.

Maybe this is a lesson learned for anyone who insists on patronizing a sleazy Asian bar scene where cultures are contradicted and traditional ideas clash and pride hurts the most when truth prevails.

But, when it doesn’t ….as the Bible puts it: “The dog returns to his own vomit and the sow to her mire”.

Some of us were lucky enough and wise enough during our lives to escape from the foolishness of our youth.

Some never learn and will end their days in misery.

What more is there to say…?

Stickman's thoughts:

Damn the skytrain!