Readers' Submissions

Said I Love You But I Lie

  • Written by Horizon
  • November 13th, 2004
  • 7 min read

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Let me say thank you for my job-a receptionist that has nothing to do much so I have a lot of free time to enter to internet (sometimes I think they hired me for traveling in the internet world. Sounds great, right? Don’t envy me coz I’m
so bored now). I’m so lucky to find this site. It’s so good to know people‘s views about my country. Also it is a good chance for me to practice my English skills. “Good morning ka” and “go along this
way and turn left the toilet is in your right side” is all English words I have to say almost everyday. So, don’t get upset when you see some (maybe a lot mistake). Ok, let start before my boss will notice!

“Don’t fall in love with any bargirl” I see this warning from many issues in this site but after reading, I found that there are many farangs who can’t help falling in love with them. Why? Why do they think they love those
girls who do anything for just pleasing the custom? I don’t know. It might hard for me to understand that feeling because I’m not farang. I’m Thai woman who was born and raised in Isaan. What I want to know and share are my
ideas about bargirls. Farangs can sometimes easily fall in love with bargirls. And how about bargirls? Have you ever thought that what do they feel? Did they love you as they always said? Or they just tell you a lie? And it is really a lie?

The point that I want to say here is not about reasons of falling in love (how dare a person who never have love talks about it!). But it is about bargirls’ feeling (No no, don’t think you are too lucky to read the issue here directly from
them. I’m not a bargirl and never want to be.) As I told you that I’m from Isaan so I quite a little bit believe that I might be able to guess the feeling of bargirls who always come from the Isaan countryside. When I was in high
school, I used to hate prostitutes or bargirls because I thought their behavior ruined Thai’s image. Many people think Thailand is a land for sex because of them. Many people think they can buy Thai women with a little money because of
them. Many embassies don’t let Thai women enter in their countries and do a bad treat with us because of them. That was I thought when I was young. But after I studied more (special thank for temporary class), I changed my mind. Now I don’t
hate but sympathy instead. Most of bargirl is Isaan or any poor girl from countryside. They don’t know much about the wild world outside their villages. Some of them have to do that because they have a low educate so they are so easy to
be tricked or forced to be a prostitute. They are too naïve to fight for their right. And when they get use to with this stupid world, they might think it is too late to escape and it seems very hard for low educated person to find a job.
They might think they have no choice. I believe no one wants to be a prostitute. Do you think so? However, it doesn’t mean all is good. There are some women are too bad to be true so there are someone who is willing to be prostitute because
they think it is the easiest way to get money and get a rich silly farang so that they can use his money for just playing any silly gambling , shopping or drinking all day. For people who have stereotypes about Thai, I think perhaps because those
people have a narrow mind. Every place in the world has a prostitute (It is the demand & supply theory, right?). But why people focus only in Thailand? So I tell myself that just forget and forgive those narrow mind people.

Anyway, I don’t want to talk about the bad one. All I want to know is if it possible that bargirls can really fall in love with farang who just come to enjoy themselves, who just “f…and forget” (I got this sentence for Pattaya
where shocked and scared me with a lot of prostitute. If I have a chance I will tell you later about the Pattaya in my Isaan Thai view). Do bargirls really have love as they said? Someone might answer “Yes, why not” for this question
without hesitation because there are many bargirls who now have a happy marriage with farangs husband. Ok so now we know that there are some that not lie. And how about the others who lie and the others one who lie. The one who lie, she wants
only money. She is in the f…..and forget group! Ok, forget this group. But I will focus to the others who lie. The one who said I love you….but I lie. Yes it is like the song, her feeling is more than love or she says she lies but
it is not lie. Confuse? I mean in fact she does love you but she has to think it is a lie! Such a case like this can happen? Comparing with the farangs’ side that has the warning about bargirl so there has no doubt that bargirls ’side
should also have one. But what warning is about? I don’t know really I never have a chance to talk to them. (Maybe some of you might know well, if so let me know please). I guess those warn should be like this “Don’t waste
the time with the poor customer”, “Try to get the rich young one”, “Get ready everyday”, “Don’t let the baby stay in the stomach because be sure that no one wants to be his/her father (but if it
is you plan, hm….no comment)”, etc. Among a dozen of the warning I believe the most important one is “Don’t fell in love with farangs, only sex they want not your heart”. I know there might have suggest for bargirls
to try to get the farang husband. But remember for them husband might not mean the one they fall in love but is the one who can support their finance. So, I think there are a lot of bargirls who meet the one that they like or their Mr. Right.
But at last they might end up with thinking that the entire thing that she said to him is just other lie that she should do or have to do. They might to keep telling themselves that no one wants to have a serious relationship with them. They give
happiness for client but all they get except money is just an empty feeling inside. They have to not bring their heart with them while they are working because it is not good for giving heart to clients who are far away from them. Some farangs
feel pain when they have to leave. It might also happen with bargirls to know that one day they have to say bye. And while you come back to you hometown staying at your comfortable house and gradually forgetting the girl that you meet in Thailand,
that girl stills stuck with the bad bar bad people, bad environment and wonder when you will come back. That’s all what I think about the bargirl’s feeling. It is another side of them that you might have never thinks. They can really
fall in love and love. They can really said I LOVE YOU …but I lie. Do your bargirls lie or lie?

Stickman’s thoughts:


Contributions from Thais are always VERY welcome!