Readers' Submissions

Visit To England – Part 6 – Month 4



I nearly sent Flossy home this month.

A couple of weeks ago the moment all of us stupid farangs (with ex bargirls for girlfriends) dread happened – she lost her temper in public.

I will explain the build up to this first. My landlady was having a quiet drink in the pub with me, flossy (Flossy is the nickname I have chosen for my girlfriend, if you’ve not read my previous submissions) her husband, and a beautiful blond girl. I discovered that the beautiful blond girl, let us call her “Bimbo” for now, was from the Czech Republic, and the former nanny for my landlady’s children. Unfortunately she’d been kicked out of her digs by her German boyfriend, and was back in England (she’d been in Germany) looking for work.

We were short staffed, so naturally I offered Bimbo a temporary job whilst she looked for full time work. Mistake number 1.

Flossy then immediately took an instant dislike to her, particularly because bimbo took an instant shine to me.

Several days later, I invited a pal to stay so we could go out for a beer or three. My pal, let’s call him Fanny magnet, cos it’s funny, and he is one, that is, he is a fanny magnet. When he goes out, girls surround him like flies round shit. Anyway, I decided it would be good if Bimbo joined fanny magnet, myself and flossy for a beer.

At around 12pm, we ended up in a nightclub; all was well, though flossy had virtually ignored bimbo all night. Additionally it had become apparent that Bimbo wasn’t quite into fanny magnet in quite the way I thought she would be, and was spending too much time talking to me.

Flossy decided it was time to dance, and pulled at my hands, but I was at the time being told how lucky I was to have my own business, travel the world, and stuff like that by Bimbo, and I was feeling rather flattered. Mistake number 2.

Besides the music was crap, and I thought Fanny magnet would be up dancing with Flossy as he had on previous occasions. It became obvious Flossy wasn’t prepared to leave me alone with bimbo.

Then Flossy, with an edge to her voice said she wanted to go back home. I told her that was fine, and offered her the door key. The final mistake.

“You come back now.”

“No, I’m with my friend Fanny Magnet, and want to stay.”

“You come back now, I want to go home, and I not want you stay here WITH HER.”….pointing at her from 6 inches away.

“Sorry, but I don’t want to go home yet, you go home if you want, and I’ll be back soon.”

She then threw a drink over me, screamed, pulled at my clothes and stormed out of the club. After the initial embarrassment, I dried myself out in the loo, and returned to my seat in the club.

A couple of hours later I returned to my apartment with Fanny Magnet only, as Bimbo had chosen to go home (Though I had been invited to stay with Bimbo at this stage, as Bimbo felt that perhaps I wouldn’t want to go home, which was generous of her. I may be stupid, but I think perhaps this would have added fuel to an already VERY alight fire.)

I opened the apartment door to find a very, very, very drunk flossy spread across the sofa, along with several empty bottles of wine, and an empty bottle of Bacardi.

Yes, she’d drunk the lot, and smashed several glasses in the process.

She slumped over fanny magnet, and repeatedly said sorry to him for 10 minutes, though ignoring me completely. She then left our company, preferring the company of the blue goldfish. (The toilet)

Perhaps many of you would have counselled her at this stage, to find out what particularly had gone wrong, but speaking for myself, I have never in the years I was married, nor the previous years, nor in fact, subsequently, IE, I have never had a drink thrown over me, accept by accident, and I wasn’t about to pander to the whims of a drunk, incoherent Thai girl that was throwing up, and feeling sorry for herself, having had alcohol poured over me, not now, nor ever.

Perhaps more importantly, I was fully aware of what was wrong, as you are yourselves reading this, and I also know that if I were to chase after Flossy at this stage, I would be completely bowing to her stupid childish behavior.

An hour or so later, I decided to go to bed. Fanny Magnet wished me good luck, and went off to his room, and I proceeded into my bedroom.

Flossy was crying her eyes out, and then lost her temper again, and started screaming that she was going to kill herself.

Personally, I have no sympathy for people who threaten this action, as my office is next door to a counselling service, I am reliably informed self harming, and suicidal behavior is a cry for help, and nothing more, and whilst I appreciate she is asking for help from me, a regular supply of love, financial reward, and attention comes from me to her, and if she decided this isn’t sufficient, she can bugger off back to whence she came, or indeed slash her wrists etc. I bend over backwards to make her feel at home, pander to most of her whims, and show her more affection than I did to my ex in the 18 years we were together.

Some months previously she had tried this, and had wielded a knife at me. At that time, I had simply walked out of her apartment, and told her to get on with it, and if she failed, she would find me in my usual hotel, which worked sufficiently enough to shut her up. (Eventually) This time, I told her there was a particularly large and sharp kitchen knife in the kitchen, and if she stood in the shower she wouldn’t mess up my apartment. This obviously gave way to personal threats made towards me, and I of course told her to hurry up, because I wanted to sleep.

Some while later she calmed down, and quietly sobbed in the bed.

(I’m sorry to those that feel I should have been more sympathetic, but I have seen her behave like this before, and she knows exactly how I will react. If I start to pander to her, it will get worse, not better, and if she’s daft enough to hurt herself, then she isn’t the girl I want to spend my time with. I am 37 years old, and whilst I adore her, and am willing to forgive certain child like, and daft behavior, I don’t need, nor will put up with this crap)

The next day I told her to pack her bag, and when I finish work, I would be taking her to the airport. I left her to sulk.

That evening when I arrived home she was still sulking, but hadn’t packed her bag.

Fortunately for her I was going to be away in Spain for the next 4 days, and couldn’t afford to leave a suicidal Thai girl in my apartment, so I decided I was going to have to talk to her.

Well, for the first time ever, she opened up completely. I mean, I wasn’t aware that she contained so much emotion.

We got over the temper tantrum quickly. She explained she’d told her parents about what had happened, she had spoken with friends (God help my phone bill again) and all had told her what to do, ALL had told her to grow up, and start behaving herself, as she was about to lose me, and this had an instant and amazing effect.

For the first time she spoke emotionally, but clearly about her life to date, her parents treatment of her, and hers of them, how she got into the naughty nightlife, the pressure her parents put her under to support them, her brothers and how they fit into her life. What she thought of me. (Incredibly, she told me truthfully about how she played me for just another stupid farang in the beginning, how her parents and her plotted to get money from me, and much much more besides.)

She spoke honestly about the pressure for her to marry me, but that she hadn’t been certain how she felt about marrying a farang. She stated she felt she needed to grow up more before we married, but that she wanted me to be clear that she felt this was because she was sure I would not marry her until she grew up. She admitted being lazy, and she would improve this. She wanted me to teach her to cook English food, so she could look after me properly. She knew she had crossed a line, and felt certain she had gone too far, and as such, she was going to show me what a Thai girl can and will do to keep her man.

We talked for hours, about everything; she bared all, much of which I’d never heard before. She cried, we hugged, and she would talk more.

I can’t begin to fully go into detail here, but you need to know that it has had a dramatic effect on her, and her outlook. Whether this will be temporary, or permanent, I’ve yet to see, and frankly, I’m assuming it’s temporary.

I never thought I would begin to understand what went on in that mind of hers, but I learnt a huge amount, and feel I am closer than I’ve ever been to understanding her.

She may well be a peasant farmer’s girl, as Stick quite rightly mentioned at the end of my previous submission, and the emotional temper tantrum that I experienced left nothing to suggest she was anything otherwise, but I add in her defence, that the level of maturity and intelligence that she has shown me subsequently has been incredible.

She stepped over the line, and now theirs a 10ft wall for her to climb!

I’ll try to let you know how we get on.


Till next time.
The Director.

(P.S. This is bloody exciting – All these sad sods that moan about loosing their 50,000 baht after 4 months, should try it for the long term. This has cost me hundreds of thousands of baht, and I’ve never had so much fun. Win or loose, this has been worth every penny / baht for the experience alone – though it goes against 90% of all the other advice on this web site – you gotta give yourself a chance with a bargirl, it’s better than a 100 ft Bungee Jump, with 150 ft of elastic!)

Stickman's thoughts:

I think the next piece in this excellent series will be the most interesting yet. A totally captivating series.